Help Getting Through M C Part 5

137 Replies
Jennifer28 - June 22

This thread is for anyone that has experienced a miscarriage (m/c) and is looking for advice on how to cope or need to talk to other women who have experienced the loss. **Some of the women on this thread are pregnant following a m/c, trying to conceive (ttc), or have just recently suffered from the loss of a m/c...

 

Jennifer28 - June 22

Hey girls. Hope you find it. I thought I would put a small explaination of what this site is about - since it really seems to have become MORE than just helping others through a miscarriage - although we are all still coping with our losses. Make sense to everyone? I hope so. Well, let's get it started! :)

 

BIG RED - June 22

Hi Jennifer 28. I just posted yesterday t_tle I need some support. I just went through a m/c in April. I am still bleeding from it. I am having the hardest time coping with this. It was just so unexpected and sudden. I was so excited. I was getting things all ready making plans and room for the new baby. I have 2 girls of my own ages 5&6 and my fiance has a daughter age 5. This was going to be the 1st pregnancy , birth and raising of a child I would have gotten to do with a partner. They dads of my girls have never been there and they don't see there children either. When we were told that there was no heatbeat at the Dr.'s office. My fiance was releaved. This last pregnancy was a surprise to both of us. He was not supportive at all. He has since then gotten a vesectomy in May even with my protesting against it. I am just having a hard time getting over the loss of my baby. I haven't yet figured out how to just move on with life now knowing that I will not have anymore babies if I stay with this man. My girls were devistated that I lost the baby they wanted a baby brother so bad. How do you just move on?

 

Jennifer28 - June 22

Welcome, Big Red. Let me start by saying I am so sorry for your loss. There is no 'just moving on' from a m/c. You will greive the loss of your child for years to come. But, it does get easier with time. You will cry a little less everyday. But, you will NEVER forget. When you need someone to talk to, this forum is a wonderful place to turn. We have all been thru what you are experiencing and can hopefully help you to cope with your loss. {{{HUGS}}}... I am so sorry your fiance is being such an a__s (for lack of a better word). My question for you is - if he went and made such a huge life altering decision w/o your support, is he really the guy you want to spend the rest of your life with? Granted, I don't know your whole story. He may be a really nice guy - except for in this situation - and he might be a great daddy to his and your children. But it seems to me as if you have a lot of soul searching to do. The fact that he was relieved to have lost his own child is pretty horrific. Unplanned pregnancy or not. I'm sorry if I was a bit harsh. I just hate to think you are going thru this alone. But, we're here when you need to talk!! {{{BIG HUGS}}}.

 

josita - June 22

great idea jen28 --- congrats so much on the recent good news... it is so awesome to be progressing well... you are always in my prayers that it continues! Also, jen01 (I forgot ur #) half way there is great! keep us updated of all your good news... I had the worst day yesterday, the vulture City of Chicago towed my car.. it was complicated, but took bascially all day and $160 to get it back. Plus they ticket you! I parked in a meter which I thought was ok, but then got back and my car was gone (no parking on school days -) the catch is, school is out for the summer... anyways, I got the car back , so minus the $160 no huge loss. Plus, I got to spend the whole day with dh, which is rare and was really nice :) I love to read all of your stories, by the way, just want everyone to know that I truly love this forum... to all the newbies... stay with us if you feel inclined! mc is something, I have found, that noone wants to really talk about - it is upsetting and everyone just counters by saying 'you'll get pregnant, don't worry.' Since I have no kids, I hope that this is true - but who really knows? I found it true with my dh also, although he is amazing, so supportive, etc, etc. he just can't seem to talk about it. Plus, almost everyone in my life has never been though an mc or has had an mc, but with successful preg. So i find this forum a god-send. with respect to me physically, I am pretty sure that I am having my period right now... so thats good news. I haven't been to the doc yet to find out if my levels are to 0, i should do that soon. feel like i need to write more....

 

BIG RED - June 22

Jennifer 28 thank you for the warm welcome. You are right ton of soul searching I need to do. He is a nice guy generally but you are right he was an a__s in this situation. I do want more kids just very fearful of being alone again. Well I am glad someone else besides me thought he was being a total a__s about the whole situation. I am so glad I found this place it is nice to talk with women who are going through the same things I am and those who have already been there. To read about hard times getting better is very hopeful!!!!!!! :)

 

littleangel - June 22

hi jennifer, glad you started part 5 i cant belive its got so long again, i hope every one finds us and i hope you are ok too. welcome Big Red, sorry for your loss, you will be help a lot on here and the woman are just great if you ever need to talk or just vent about any thing you can on here, here is my history i lost my DD on 11/01/06 i was 22wks pg and had to give birth to her, it was the hardest thing i have every done in my life, but i am ok now, i know that next time i will be look after as i had test done and they said i have something wrong with my placenta not producing enough oxygen to her which cause blood clots, so next time i will have meds to help me thin my blood. i am on CD28 today still no AF so i am not stressing out yet cos the witch could turn up at any time, so i have been at work all day with a tampon in my bra cos i had no pockets lol, so every time i went to the loo to check i had one on me and its still there. so dont know what to do. just have to wait and see. talk later chow for now. :) jo

 

ksorbin - June 22

Hi all!! Well...I continue to test and I continue to get BFPs. At some point I am sure it will completely hit me. My OB was so excited. She is seeing me on 7/6 and then I have a sono scheduled for 7/11. I made an error in estimating my due date. It is actually 2/28/07. I am 4wks and 1 day according to my LMP. Feeling pretty good, except bloated with some pelvic pains. -------------------- BIG RED--First off...I am soooo sorry about losing your baby. I lost my ds at 18wks and delivered him born still. It is sooo difficult to lose a baby at any time. Please know the women here are AWESOME. They have helped me through my loss, and now they are already helping me through my current pregnancy (which I found out about 2 days ago). Second.....I agree with Jen28...what an a__s. You do NOT want to be with someone who finds it relieving that they have lost their unborn child. How horrible and insensitive. DONT be afraid of being alone....be afraid of being with someone like that. There are NICE fish in the sea and MOST would be devastated if they lost their unborn child. I am sorry if I am being too blunt, but that made me angry that he was like that. Maybe its my hormones. --------------------------------Jen28--thanks for the advice. I will try to relax, but it is hard. I so badly want things to go right. It is hard. I am feeling a little more at ease, but will be much better when I have my sono and see something. Hopefully a hb. And a fast 1 at that.--------------------------------Josita...sorry about your rough day. I am glad you are getting your cycle back to normal. I found my first af to be VERY relieving.----------------------------------------------------------Jo---CD28????? When are you going to test? I am soooooooooooooo praying for you. That would be awesome!!! Let us know what happens either way. -----------------------------Well I better go. I am going to go to the gym and get in a light workout. I will talk to you ladies soon. -Kortnee

 

BIG RED - June 22

ksorbin, Thank you so much for the words of encouragment. CONGRADULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

josita - June 22

the transition to part 5, i forgot so much! KORT-- I am SO excited for you... I love love good news, esp on the baby front! and i have to agree with you... JO -- not testing yet??? Big Red, I am so sorry for your loss, it is something so horrible -- i hope that you find the strength to do what is right for you and to not let your partner make a decision for you that you know is not right.... keep us updated... ok I got to go home now...

 

kiza - June 22

Hey ladies, great to see a new thread. Jennifer28, glad to hear all is well---------BIG RED so sorry for your loss and also the att_tude of your partner. I think what he has done is quite appalling, and it really just adds to the grieving process for you. Take time out with your girls and look at the relationship from the outside and see if he truly does make you happy.--------josita, I'm sorry but I laughed when I read about your car ( I really am sorry ) but we just don't have that sort of thing here in Sth Aussie. The worst we get is parking fines of about $13.00AUD. What a pain in the arse that must have been for you, and $160.00 I can't believe it. Hopefully your levels are 0 now and you can't begin again with the rest of us. ------Jo cd28 how,have you resisted testing. I'd be peeing all over the place ( on a stick of course lol ) Best of luck when you do test though. ----- Kort I'm so with you through this, cause like myself it is not just the first trimester to worry getting over with us. We have both lost babies later in the prgnancy and I know myself until I have that healthy baby in my arms, I'm always going to worry. I've finished my clomid now so the wait is on. Still wondering about the Robitussin though? Am I supposed to start it on the last day of tablet for 3 days or 3 days after last tablet for 3days. I hope you are all as confused as I am now lol. Take care girls and will catch up later.xxxxx

 

kiza - June 22

Don't worry about the Robitussen, sorry Kortnee answered it for me in another thread. Thanks girls. xxxx

 

AshleyB - June 22

Just wanted to pop in and say Congratulations kortnee!!!!!! I'm so happy for you.!! I'm doing fine. It's good to start a fresh thread. I'm 15wks tomorrow. Can hardly believe it. I'm still really sick without the zofran. I wish I didn't need it anymore. But I went off it at the beginning of the week and suffered terribly. Throwing up constantly. So I guess it's not over for me yet . But I can manage ok with the meds. I'm still down 18lbs. Who would have thought you'd LOSE weight during pregnancy. LOL weird. Well gotta go, just wanted to let you know KOrtnee how excited I am for ya. And you're in my prayers that everything works out beautifully for you!!

 

anita g - June 22

Hi ladies, Today is Thursday! Almost the weekend... thanks Jenifer for the new thread...Welcome Big Red, I am sorry for loss and maybe take some time to think about things between you and your fiance. If you I may offer some advice think about what your life would be like with your finance, Would it be better with or without him. I don't want to over step my grounds or come down on him. Because I don't know him I am sure he is a good guy. Here is my history: I went for an u/s on May 15th and there was no hb I was at 9wks and the baby was at 8wks. I had an d&c on May 17th. This was our first pregnancy. It was really hard but I excepted that it was God's will and we are currently ttc. The girls on this thread have been great and offered great advice and ears. So if you feel you need to vent about anything this is your place. josita that stinks about your car, but I am glad you are ok and spent time with your DH. In my development we have only head in parking. Ask what the HELL does that mean? LOL It means no back end parking. A friend of mine got his car towed because of that. I did not know the rule or I would have told him to park front end. These home a__sociations do what the HELL they want to do. But, I paid for the tow $ 90. Sorry that happen to you. Kortnee, Cool a Feb baby. I am a Feb baby my birthday is 02/23. Maybe she/he or they ...lol will be born on my birthday.. Well I'm going to call my husband now I will check in later. BABY DUST!!!!!!!

 

llisab - June 22

Hi everyone, I'm so glad that I found this site. I have found it very encouraging. I miscarried April 23, and am still spotting and bleeding. I had my Hcg levels taken yesterday, and they are down to 16. Do you know if you can get your first period before your levels go down to 0?

 

kiza - June 23

Hi AshleyB, good to hear from you. Hey anita g, hope you are keeping well.Llisab, welcome and sorry for your loss. We all feel your pain and we will do whatever it takes to help you through this. Take care ladies. xxxxx

 

littleangel - June 23

hi ladies, CD29 still not AF and was felling very sick this morning, was not sick but the motions were making me sick if that make sany sence. i know i have not tested yet cos i am so scared, i will get one tomor when i go the chemists, i am off out tonight but i am not going to drink just in case. need to let my hair down for a bit had a busy day at work. mark was like your only 2 days late dont worry it Af might come yet but you just know if you are. got to get ready chat late. i am so excited lol jo :)

 

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