Lost Baby Now Maybe Him

1 Replies
TRYNAgoon07 - February 5

I recently lost my son and I'm trying to get back into my daily routine and being strong for my 2 girls. Since it all happned and we came home there has been some tension between my husband and I as if I did something wrong. He is aware that I'd like to try again but he wont even kiss me till I have and IUD. He wasnt the happiest when we found out we were expecting but not quite then saddest when we lost our son. Im feeling lonely Im NOT feeling loved at all. He even gets upset when I cry due to the loss. Any suggestions????

 

linds99 - February 6

I'm so sorry for your loss (I'm going through it now.) Really, this is so complicated. I hate to say this, but I have found the men around me, including my husband and my brothers and father, to be the most supportive and actually appeared more sad about my miscarriage than the women in my life. So I really don't think that your husband is "typical male behavior" post miscarriage. But that is my own opinion. If we had to speculate, maybe he is harboring some resentment against you for "getting pregnant" (like he had nothing to do with it.) Maybe if you ask him directly if he is "mad at you for becoming pregnant" you can get a direct answer from him? Not so much put him on the spot, but just let him know that is the feeling or vibe you are getting from him and that you feel rather lonely and abandoned by it. As for the lack of affection and s_x with IUD, I would definitely say that he is probably not all-about with becoming a father any time soon. It is time you ask him direct questions and try to get direct answers from him like "would you like to try to have another baby?" His answers will be everything to you and you can make a better a__sessment of what is going on with him. Otherwise, we can't even speculate whether his "cold" behavior is him "not wanting to be a father" or "him just being sad in his own way and afraid of another disappointment of a miscarriage" or other issues. It must be hard to have to deal with your husband like this while you are dealing with your own grief. I hope you two find each other again and can get pa__sed this.

 

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