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Faith and hope - September 3rd, 2008 7:58 AM

My husband and I have been trying for 4 yrs to get pregnant and on 8/23 we found out that I was pregnant. We were so excited and then on 8/31 I had a miscarriage. I am at a loss, I am scared to try again as my doctor said when you get over 35 yrs of age your risk of miscarriage is greater.
How do you get over the loss and the fear of trying again concerned that you might have another miscarriage? Do you get over the fear?


julie2007 - September 4th, 2008 12:31 AM

i am so sorry for your loss. you never really do get over it - and you will always have a spot in your heart for the baby you lost. but 38 is NOTHING in terms of age. i delivered my daughter just before i turned 38 - and then once my AF came back (at 17 mos) i tried for anothe baby - got PG and m/c at 11w3d -- a little girl - who showed no signs of genetic issues - was told it was a fluke and 1 in 4 pregnancies ends in m/c...... waited the 2 mos and got PG again - only to lose another little girl at 10+ wks - this time to a trisomy. my heart was broken beyond belief - but my RE said - let's get this taken care of -- if you want a baby - then let's get you pregnant again - right away - fast FWD - after 2 d&c's in 5 months ( just 34 days after my 2nd loss) i did injectible meds and IUI (to increase my egg quality and chance for a healthy baby) - and got PG successfully again - i was so scared thru the whole thing - and worried almost the entire 9 mos - but he came thru a 7lb6oz PREEMIE who is now 11 wks old tomorrow -- and i truly consider myself blessed. . . . i don't know if you have had any testing done - but they can do tests to see what your egg quality / quantity is like - with the clomid challenge - and the FSH test on CD3 - you can google all of that - and ask for it WHEN YOU ARE READY. but if you've been trying for 4 years - i assume you have had testing for most things done already - right? how did that go? if you haven't yet - talk to your OB / RE and be sure to get it all done! -- good luck!


Kagzy - September 8th, 2008 3:19 AM

Yes miscarriage over 35yrs is slighly higher than someone who is 25 - 30, i had a miscarriage 2 weeks ago, yes that baby will always be in my heart, just like his sister or brother that i miscarried at age 23. U never forget but u still tr, just like i did and had a baby boy at 32 years, i may have m/c 2 weeks ago, but its not stopping me getting pregnant again, all pregnancies are different, i always look at it, there must have been something wrong with baby and God thought it be best to take now and not take later. Good luck on trying, it will happen xxx


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