Sad Day Today

23 Replies
joleenb - April 16

i have recently had 2 m/c in the past 6 months and i'm dying to try to get pregnant again. last night as i was laying in bed i told my husband, do you realize i should be out to here pregnant? (holding my hands way out from my belly) our first due date was june 23 and i predict that i'm going to be a total wreck on that day. for some reason it's just hitting me again, everything we've been through in the past few months. the not knowing why and being very angry. i thought i was handling the 2nd m/c a lot better than the first but i realize that i am absolutely heartbroken by BOTH!!! i guess i'm just wondering if this happens to anyone else, the random don't wanna get out of bed, so sad, kinda days? and how to cope with it?

 

minimouse - April 16

You have my deepest sympathy.

 

MamaHarms - April 16

Joleen, I know what you are going through. I had my mc last month. I realized a couple of day ago, I should be starting to show now. My due date was October 6th. Maybe this is border line crazy, but everyday when I get dressed, I have to blink back tears because my clothes still fit me. (Kind of ironic, because what woman wants their clothes to be to tight.???) Anyway, it still hurts so much, and you are not alone. Maybe in a few months, we will have good news to post here. Keep your head up. (I'm trying to)........Brandi

 

llama8 - April 16

That is so normal to feel like that. I lost my baby at 17 weeks due to a faulty and badly developed umbilical cord. I was showing and feeling kicks and then nothing...no heartbeat.(although I did feel someything wasn't right since the beginning. I can't explain why)) My baby was due in June. I know I will be a wreck when June comes. I have some goods days and other days when I am pretty sad. It's tough to act normal and keep going, but there is no choice. I don't know why this happened to me and I hope that when I do get pregnant...it willl last the next time. If you have faith in a religion...it sometimes helps. I guess I cope by trying to keep busy. I am a teacher and the high school kids that I teach keep me going and happy as well as my husband. I know someone that had 5 miscarriages and 2 healthy kids. The hope keeps me going as well. My prayers go out to you...I know what your going through. My advice is to keep busy and active because when I have time to think too much...that's when I get sad. Read a book, watch tv, garden, go shopping...anything than jsut sitting home.

 

jessica72 - April 16

Joleen, it is completely normal and understandable. I have had 2 m/c as well, one exactly a month ago. Like MamaHarms, I think about how I might have been showing by now and how I would have been finishing up the first trimester. I have very sad, weepy days and then there are great days, esp when I realize how blessed I am in other ways. So, you just take all the time it takes to heal and soon you will find the peace you desire.

 

AllieP. - April 17

Joleen, its completely normal what you are feeling! I've had three miscarriages in the last year, two D&C's. It's been a tough road for me. My last D&C was end of January and i just found out that my doctor most likely missed some tissue and my body still has an hcg level of 7 therefore thinking it's been pregnant all this time. I'm waiting it out to see if i get AF next week when the doctor thinks i should and hopefully it will "clear" me out. I cry all the time and think of how "Big" i should be right now. It's heartbreaking. You are not alone by any means!

 

tcrock02 - April 18

There is no time frame when you will feel better. My 2nd mc was 1/08. I still cry. Yesterday i seen a package in my husbands car. It was the maternity clothes i had purchased from motherhood.com and didnt even recieve them before i miscarried again. It is so hard for me to grasp why this happens to so many of us. BAby dust to all

 

Judi Sarah - April 18

JOLEEN - i have days like that too. it seems to be normal. just 2 days ago i was kinda crying when my dh came home. i would have been 26 weeks and i lost our baby at 17 weeks. it's been almost 9 weeks since my d&e, and even though we get better at coping, we will always have that. i honestly don't think we can really "heal" until we have healthy babies in our arms, God willing. i hope you feel better.

 

Judi Sarah - April 18

i meant we will always have that void.

 

joleenb - April 21

thank you all for taking the time to read my post and share your experiences. it defintely helps out having people that have been in similar situations. last nite when i got home from work my u/s pictures were on the kitchen table...my husband had been looking for something and didn't realize he had knocked them out. i know it affects him but he doesn't show it like i do. i've also found out that a few more acquantainces are now expecting so i'm back to the angry phase. it's been almost 5 wk and i'm still waiting for a "visitor". i think if i was at least back to normal and being able to have all my tests i would be doing better because essentially i'd be on the path to finding out and fixing the problem. now i'm just in limbo, once again :( i don't know why we have to be put through such an incredible kind of hurt....

 

tcrock02 - April 22

ya i hear you. I finally tucked away my u/s pictures it jus made me hurt more. My dream shattered in an instant. Its been 3 months and as i watch my 19 yr old pregnant daughter expand i just want to fall apart. She was adopted at age 12 and i love her like my blood but my heart is jealous of her everyday. I would be showinggood by now. so not fair. Life just really sucks. My DH didnt seem to take this last mc as hard as the first one. It feels like i am all alone. If it had not been for this site i dont really dont think i would be sane. Iam praying for you Joleen. Baby dust to both of us.

 

joleenb - April 22

tcrock...i am with you 150% on the jealousy thing!! it makes my heart hurt every day that i hear about people that are expecting that in my mind, shouldn't be. whether they're in abusive relationships, don't know who the father is, or pregnant for the wrong reasons...i know it's not my place to decide who should be pregnant, but i just don't get why some people have to go through so much, i don't think i did anything wrong to have this burden on me....it just hurts and makes me sad and makes even day harder to make it through... baby dust to all of us still fighting the battle

 

tcrock02 - April 22

Joleen my sister had 6 kids without even trying. She popped them out like candy. None of them graduated, they are all on drugs of some sort and have kids without daddies..... what the heck..I am a good mom. My new hubby deserves to be a daddy. 5 years and 2 miscarriages. I have PCOS found out in Feb so im on meds for that. Take my prenatal vitamins everyday to help me stay healthy.I have no insurance so going to any type of fertility Dr is out of the question. I just want ababy of my own to hold and love and kiss. Why is that so out of my reach?

 

joleenb - April 22

tcrock...is this your 1st m/c? i'm the youngest in my family, my 2 sisters have had a total of 7 pregnancies, no m/c, no complications, nothing. my husband has a 4 y/o boy who i raise as my own and now we think his biological mother who didn't even want him is quite possibly pregnant again. 4 kids, and 3 baby daddies. and now i'm in the 2 m/c and no pregnancy yet boat...life sure as sh*t isn't fair sometimes..it's very discouraging! i'm hoping i can hurry up and get my testing under way and find out if there really is a problem with me or if this is just god's way of punishing me for something :(

 

tcrock02 - April 24

I had a mc in 2006 than this one. I too felt like God was punishing me for something it was so funny to hear someone else say that also. i am on Metformin for my PCOS but i lost my insurance after the miscarrige so i cant go back to the DR for further tests and that sucks. I am 37 almost 38 and time is running out i feel like i am spinning my wheels. I bought a statue for my last mc, i named my baby also.People may think i am odd but this was my child wether i lost it at 12 weeks or whatever. The statue is a baby laying on the hand of Jesus. I love that child and no one cant take that from me. As I try to move forward and concieve again i will never forget the 2 angels i lost.

 

abc05 - May 13

Hi. I just want to let you know that my due date was June 21st, I had a misscarriage on December 4th. I took it extremly hard at first, then I thought I was improving but the past two weeks all I want to do is lay on the couch and cry.. June 21st is comming up and I feel crazy because I am still taking it so hard, though this is my first misccarriage, first child even at that.. If you ever need to talk please let me know, im going through the same thing. goodluck.

 

clare-louise - May 13

Joleenb - I know how you feel. its such a horrible time. one min you think your going to be fine but the next a lump comes in your thoat and the tears start again. I lost mine 3 weks ago now and it is still hurting now as much as it did then. Dont know about you but every where i go now i seem see expectant mothers and new born babys, just Sunday i had to run out of Tesco crying as i couldnt handle it. your not alone Hon. i hope you have some good news soon.....I hope we all do

 

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