Scared To Death -pg117111845821

8 Replies
KMcDougall - February 10

Hi everyone.....last monday i started to spot bleed and i would have been eight weeks pregnant the next day(Feb 10). I went to the doctor the same day i started to spot bleed my baby was only measuring 5w 6d two weeks from what it was suppose to be measuring and there was no heart beat. The doctor was very blunt with me and bascially told me and my husband that she was 90% sure that i was miscarrying. She really didnt give us any hope at all. I kept telling my self all that day and the next day that women have periods all the time while there pregnant and that was what i was doing and that everything was going to be ok. Well wednesday morning when i woke up i passed the baby:( which would have been the exact same day i would have started my period if i wasnt pregnant(which i found to be kinda odd) I went back to the doctor and sure enough there was no baby on ultrasound now and the doctor told me that i had had a complete missacarriage and i would not need a D&C which i guess was a good thing from her stand point. she told me to expect to bleed for at least 3 weeks. well i stopped bleeding 4 days after that just as i would have if i was having my period. the doctor told me that i had to wiat one mointh....or until one normal period before we could try again. My question to you all is, is one month to early? should i wait two months or what?

 

KMcDougall - February 10

opps sorry bout the first part i meant to say that i would have been eight weeks pregnanton Jan 30.

 

sososleepy - February 10

K, I'm very sorry. I started mc 28 Jan followed by dnc 29 Jan. Was 9 weeks. I spent most of Sunday afternoon hoping it would all be ok. There was no doubt by Sunday evening. My doc said not to bd for at least 2 weeks, till appt. 12 Feb. We, um... didn't quite follow directions because I am flipping out thinking I could ovulate (everyone says probably won't) before the appointment and I do NOT want af to visit, and I missed doing the baby dance; it's comforting, depending on the tempo of the tune, if you know what I mean. I needed that really badly. After dnc the bleeding and cramping stopped; just twinges and spotting. I waited (counting mc as cd1, dnc as cd2) to cd 12 to bd; spotting had stooped several days prior. Again, that was without permission from doc, although he did say if all was well on visit on 12th he'd let us bd at that time. I've read a lot on this, and it looks like if you have dnc you should wait at least 2 weeks, many many places & ppl say wait 1 to 3 cycles, but a lot of women have posted that they bd a week and a half or later after and got pg; some did fine, some didn't stay pg. I dind't find any concrete answers or statistics so I'm going to give it a shot and if my body is ready perhaps I'll get lucky. It's a personal decision. If you can stand waiting, it's probably better to wait for at least 1 normal period; that will also make it easier to date the pg, which the docs really seem to prefer. I hope you're doing as ok as you can be. Hugs.

 

KMcDougall - February 10

I figured we should wait atleast one month. My husband is leaning towards two months becasue he said he didnt know if he could handle going through this again. I am doind as well as can be expected. I am more worried about my husband now than anything, he really wont talk about anything and its almost like he still doesnt want to believe that im not pregnant. Today was my first day back to work in two weeks and it was hard because there was a lot of people that still didnt know that would ask me things like "hows that baby" and it was soooo very hard telling them that there wsa no baby anymore. I am pretty sure that after one normal cycle we will start trying again. It was soooo hard telling everybody that i had miscarried right after everyone was just begining to get sooo excited about me being pregnant. I am the baby on my side of the family and my husband is an only child. Even though i know that this miscarriage wasnt my fault i still feel like i let everyone down. We got pregnant pretty quick...i had been on birth control for six years and came off of it in november and by the middle of december we were pregnant. I just hope that it doenst this doesnt happen again because i dont know if i could handle it a second time.

 

jalbert - February 10

If it's your first m/c, then most OB's will say to have one normal cycle before trying again. If you've had recurring m/c's, the doctors prefer you hold off for a bit longer. It's whatever you feel comfortable doing.

 

KMcDougall - February 10

Thanks jalbert, i am still scared and will be until i get pregnant again and get past the 8 week mark the second time around. My husband is really the one i am concerned about being a nervous wreck. :) Does stress or working to much play any role in miscarrying?

 

DownbutnotOUT - February 10

Hi I had a missed m/c in May 2006 and than got pregnant right away and had a chemical pregnancy in June. I didnt have a period for two months, af started September 3 and I got pregnant in september! I am currently 22 weeks and 6 days and im having some complications, early labour but it happened with my alst pregnancy, other than that Im having a healthy baby boy. I know its hard but I do believe in waiting at least 2 months to let your uterus heal because I have read horror stories about women losing babies in the 2nd tri after concieving first month after a m/c but I have also heard of success stories. For me the wait is worth it, my SIL lost a baby in August or September and she waited 2 months and her pregnancy is going very well. take care and good luck to you.

 

kristie h - February 11

Hi, 1st of all i would like to say that i am very sorry for your loss. 1 month your body may be ready to conceive but is that enough time mentally? The one thing you have to ask your self are you wanting to ttc straight away to "replace" the pregnancy you loss? I have had two losses and with my last loss my hormones were all over the place for 6 months (i was ttc for that 6 months) so i went on the pill for 3 months to correct it. During that three months of being on the pill i realised i was only trying straight away cause i wanted to be pregnant with my last loss, if that makes sence? I went off the pill in novemeber 2006 and i am now 9 weeks pregnant. No one can say, if one month or 2 months is long enough as it depends on your body but with what ever you and your DH decide i wish you both all the best.

 

KMcDougall - February 11

Thanks!! and i completely understand what you are saying. In some ways i think you might be right but then in others i just want a baby, not nessecarily to replace the one i lost but just becasuse i am ready to start a family now! :) I mean i feel like i did everything right, i am 21 married just graduated RN school and now i am ready for that little one but unfortuantely it doesnt look like that is going to happen. I have been thinking alot about what you said though and i go back to the doctor on march 6th so i will have them draw labs on me to find out what all my hormone levels are and wether or not its safe for to try again.

 

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