Sexual Abuse Or My Fault What Should I Do

7 Replies
musiclover - April 19

I know that this is a pregnancy forum but I don't know where else to get people's opinion so I'm just gonna ask here. When I was 13 I started having s_x with my dad. I met him when I was 11 when he found out that I was in foster care. He never even knew I existed. He got custody of me. He had been making subtle advances towards me and I have to admit I didn't fight him because I only wanted to make him happy. I guess I even encouraged it. The s_x continued until I was 18 and I joined the Marine Corps to get away from him. I thought that I was free from the problem but people that I have talked to about this tell me that if I don't do something about it he could be doing it to other people and I know that he would if he got the chance. I don't want to be the reason that it happens to somebody else. What should I do? I do love my dad. There were times that he was a good father and he is a person. I don't want to be responsible for ruining his life over something that I feel like I am guilty of too. but I don't want another child to feel as dirty and horrible as I do about myself. What should I do?

 

TrevorsMommy - April 19

Uhh...yea. I'm not really sure this the right place for this topic. This is a Forum on Pregnancy Loss. Please direct this somewhere else and go see a Psychologist.

 

Tasman Bay Butterfly - April 19

You need to speak to a counselor about these feelings and you are not responsible for another person's actions, only your own. Speaking to somebody professional will help you sort through things. Don't feel bad about it. You need to work on your own self esteem.

 

Tasman Bay Butterfly - April 19

By the way, what he did to you was not your fault.

 

kalokairi - April 20

you need to go talk to someone hon, someone who can help you work this out. you did nothing wrong, whether you said no or not. you were a child, he is an adult. you have absolutely no reponsiblity for what happened.

 

Judi Sarah - April 20

MUSICLOVER - i think some of the other women are right. you should certainly talk to a counselor and i think you must tell someone about his abuse whether you love him or not. what he has done is wrong and for you not to say anything may allow him to do it someone else and ruin an innocent life. if you feel you will ruin his life, that is not true b/c he has done that on his own and has ruined your life also. the consequences of his actions on you are not good and will never be good. honestly, i find it hard to understand how you can love your father when he has done something so horrific. please seek help and i hope you come back to let us know your progress. TREVORSMOMMY - i cannot tell the tone of your post, but it definitely came off as discouraging and mean. i am sure that' not what you meant it to sound like when someone came here not knowing where else to turn with such a huge problem. if i have learned anything from this forum, it is that we are all here to support each other and i think no matter the tragedy, as women who have suffered in some way, i think we should all offer each other comfort.

 

Teddyfinch - April 20

my opinion on this is your dad is sick mentally. and because you love him, you need to talk to someone so he can get help.

 

Tasman Bay Butterfly - April 20

HUGS

 

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