Went To RE Today

11 Replies
karen goode - May 8

Hi ladies I just wanted to update you. I went to RE today. He performed an ultrasound which showed my uterus is o.k but there is a 10% it is not. I have to go for hystosonogram (wrong spelling). My gut tells me there is nothing wrong with me. The doctor said there is a 50% chance i could go on to have a baby with a 25% chance of mc. BTW this specialist said that after we have the sono we could ttc. We don't have to wait more than 1 cycle. Every doctor has a different opinion.

 

pink_roses - May 8

hi karen, sounds like good news. are you feeling better now that you have had your appt? they use a lot of percentages when they talk. what's a hystosonogram?

 

JuJu - May 8

Karen; sending big hugs your way......although the odds are still in your favour, I can hear how worried you are. Having babies was not supposed to be this hard!! I am not sure how old you are, but I am sure you'll be fine; it may just take a little longer than you initially thought. The procedure sounds like it shouldn't be too painful, but I empathise completely - these types of procedures are never fun. But just think, after it you'll be one step closer to having that little baby! Thinking of you- XX

 

Kristine - May 8

Karen, When are they doing the hysterosalpinogram? Did he say anything about drug treatment? By the way I don't believe in bad luck. There has to be some underlying reason science has not discovered yet. In regards to age, many women have healthy babies after 35 so it's hard for me to accept that reason also. Don't give up Karen. :-)

 

karen goode - May 9

Thanks guys for your support. I have to call on the first day of my period to schedule the hysterosalpinogram. I also have to have blood work called Tennessee bloods. It tests for Anticardiolipin Antibodies. I already had this done but the RE said sometimes when bloodwork is done in a commercial lab mistakes happen. It has to get fed ex out and will cost us $200. I know they are not going to find anything wrong with me even after the sono. I just feel that intuitively it is my age. Yes some women have babies older like my mother who had me at 39 but she was lucky. I am 35. I do believe it is like a roll of the dye. I am just so scared we will never have children. I would be grateful for one i am not greedy. I always imagined having at least 2 but that's not going to happen. I am sorry if I sound down it's just that i have such a strong feeling about this and i can't shake it.

 

pink_roses - May 9

karen, keep your chin up. i know things seem scary now (i have been having anxiety attacks at random times) but we just have to stay positive. i have many friands who have had babies after the age of 35 and they have more than one. it did take a while and a few more m/c than if they were 23 but they did it. knowing this keeps me going. m/c is kept so secret in our society. i know that is b/c we tend to be control freaks but i sometimes feel it is a disservice to women. it is so common- not that i am saying this to dismiss what all of us on this board feel about our miscarriages. it's devestating even if it is common and i don't think people understand that. we have to find support on the internet instead of around us and that sometimes annoys me. i wish people could be more sensitive. when we (society) sees celebrities (the ones who are always talking about wanting children) gain weight and then lose it, they get slammed for being fat when the truth can possibly be that they miscarried or are going through a hard time. i know that is a weird example but it just demonstrates to me how insensitive we as a society can be to each other in general. i just don't understand people sometimes. **steps off soapbox** sorry about my rant.... it's been a hard week of doing too much thinking about this experience.... karen, i know this is scary and hard, but you are doing all you can to get the information you need to get through this. i am sure everything will go well with the hystersalpinogram. don't give up- and i won't either! :)

 

karen goode - May 9

Thank you pink roses you are the best. You hit the nale on how i am feeling. I too am having panic attacks. Chest pains and @times shortness of breath. I felt somewhat better before i went yesterday. I feel bummed out now. My husband gave me a lecture today about positive thinking. I know how important it is but it's just so hard b/c i can't change my age. I am happy i did not marry anyone else and that i waited until i met the right man. It just happened later in my life.. I could never accept not having children. Thank you for your positveness. I will try as well.

 

Val - May 9

Hi Karen - I hope you don't mind me adding a comment to this thread, but I can really empathize with how you are feeling. I'm 36 and keep going back and forth between thinking there is nothing wrong with me except age, and feeling like maybe there is something wrong. (I had a mc in August and haven't been successful at conceiving again. Now in my 8th cycle post-mc.) I just bought a book yesterday called Unsung Lullabies - it's written by 3 reproductive psychologists (never knew there was such a thing.) It shares lots of stories of couples having difficult starting a family and talks about how it affects us emotionally and physically, and some steps that might help. You can find it with a google search. Take care and good luck... :-)

 

Kristine - May 9

Rachel (pInk roses), What you say is so true. There may be support out there through things like grief loss groups but you have to search on your own. I myself am contemplating some therapy but I don't know where to go. I may ask the RE Thursday. Yes, you are right it is common but it is death. We created a life and it is gone. Just because it's not a bouncing 8 pound baby, it is still a LIFE. I wish soceity would try to understand that aspect. My heart aches that I have no "substance" to bury or a grave/memorial to go to. I have just a memory box with the hpt's and sympathy cards (and lucky enough to have one sono photo for my 3rd m/c). It plays such a havoc on my mind that I try to block it out that I lost my babies in my bathroom. I am sorry to be so down here but today is my 34th birthday and it's been a blah day....................................................... Karen, have you considered seeing someone? It may help with your panic attacks. Tomorrow I am going to a Reiki session. Heck it can't hurt, right? From what I've heard, it is healing by the hands,,,,,,,supposedly rids the body of negative energy.

 

karen goode - May 10

Happy Birthday Kristine try to be good to yourself. I am happy you find an outlet to distress. My panic attacks are not too bad. I am just anxious about this procedure i have to have. I am really scared. I am sure when it is over i will feel better. I know it will be neg. so i am scared about miscarrying again.

 

pink_roses - May 10

happy birthday kristine! i have been contemplating seeing someone but my anxiety is mostly under control, it just rears it's ugly head occasionallly. i mostly talk to my mom since she is a psychologist and that helps when i am spinning down. i think i need to do something more physical though. the reiki treatment sounds interesting. i have thought about doing something like that as well- like acupuncture and cranioosacral therapy. i know someone who does craniosacral healing work but she is moving to another state. i might try to see her before she moves. i have also signed up for a yoga/pilates cla__s for stress relief. sounds like we are all on a path of some sort which is a good thing. there are no suppor groups here taht i can find since it is a small town but i am doing my best to keep my head as healthy as possible. we deserve it!

 

Kristine - May 11

Hi Karen, Went for my RE appt. today. I will be having a sonohysterogram, she increased my folic acid intake and I'm having the FSH bloodwork where they test the age of your ovaries. Regarding the sono you had at the RE this week, did they inject saline into your uterus? That's what they want me to have but I have to wait until my cycle begins.

 

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