What Do I Do Next

7 Replies
tonilee7 - June 14

Hi I am 7 weeks and 3 days today, I had my first doctors appointment this morning, i have have very light spotting for 4 days that stopped yesterday, the doc referred for an ultrasound so I went over and they put me in straight away, I had a feeling that the fetus jhad died and i was right, the lady did both an external and an internal and found no heart beat the baby only measured 6 weeks 3 days but the sac measured 7 weeks 3 days, so they just varified what I already thought. But is it possible for it to still be alive and she just didnt pick up the heart beat or is the fact the the sac is bigger a definate indication of a miscarraige. I have to go in for an ultrasound next wednesday to see what is going on, if it hasnt decided to miscarry it's self then I have to go in for a d and c, please anyone who can give me any info or even a shoulder to cry on please do not hesitate. Is there any chance that the baby could still be alive or am i dreaming and should get over it?

 

josita - June 14

Check your pregnancy symptoms, tiredness, b___st hurt, nausea, headaches... are they still present? I also went through the same thing... went in for my first us at what I thought was 9 weeks, but fetus only measured 6 weeks with a low hb (80 bpm) --- the dr left me that day with two options: 1) either my dates were wrong or 2) I was going to miscarry. I knew right away in my heart that it was probably 2. I was almost 100% sure that I had my dates right. My intuition was proved correct a week later. I think that you just need to wait it out and see (and I know that is the hardest thing to do). The week in between my first us and the next one was probably the hardest bc I just didn't know or have any answers. My heart goes out to what you are going through right now and I truly hope that you hear good news next week. Keep you spirits up as much as you can throughout this week and keep us updated.

 

jo-ann - June 14

Tonilee I'm so sorry for what you're going through, I had to do the same last month. My advice to you would be this, wait and see what your next u/s says, I know it seems like an awful wait but it really is best. If the dr is right and you have lost your baby then you need to decide whether to wait or have a d&c. I waited and after 3 weeks I pa__sed my pregnancy. I chose to wait because I'd read that d&c may cause scarring and more problems, plus I wanted to TTC again ASAP and that would have been harder after a d&c as you can sometimes bleed for longer. Everyones experience is different, it's just an awful waiting game. To be honest, if it hadn't have been for the ladies on the TTC in June after MC thread" I think I'd have lost the plot a long time ago. Their support was a Godsend. I hope everything works out for you, I'll send you a whole heap of Babydust.

 

SaraH - June 14

Hey tonilee, I'm so sorry. I also know what it's like to find out that something is wrong and be faced with "waiting to see." With my last mc (I've had 2) I also went into the doc at the start of my 8th week b/c I was spotting. The us showed that the baby was too small for my dates, but I knew exactly what my dates were so I knew there was no way I was wrong on them. The dr. told me to wait and to get my HCG levels checked everyday b/c if they were going up properly than there was hope, but if they weren't rising properly than I was probably going to mc with in the next week or two (this was for my own piece of mind only -so that I would know for sure more quickly- that my dr offered it. Maybe you could ask your dr about having it done). I got lucky (if you can call it that) in that I didn't end up having to wait around, I ended up mc naturally the middle of that night, but I know how I felt being faced with waiting, and I'm so sorry that your having to go through it. It's such an awful feeling not knowing for sure what's going on, but that you’re waiting around for the expected worse to occur. I don't know about the difference in fetal length and sac length, but I have seen a few posts on here where the dr couldn't find a heart beat and thought that the baby had died, but that at the next us they saw a heart beat so... Anyways, you’re in my prayers. HUGS

 

tonilee7 - June 14

Thanks for your support, I hold little hope that at the next ultrasound things will be different, symptoms are very rare......deep down i know that it is dead i just dont want to believe it, it is so hard to deal with especially when you have a fiance who doesnt seem concerned at all......i am better today than yesterday, i have only cried a bit today i spent all day yestereday crying......as much as want to lay down and sulk i know that it will only make things worse coz it actually gives me time to think about it, i go for blood test tomorrow to make sure my levels are not rising still then if i dont miscarry by next wednesday they are gonna give me an ultrasound to be sure then put me in for a d/c.....i think I am more scared about going under anaesetic than actually having to say goodbye to the litte one for good. I dont think i will actually comprehend what has happened until there is actually no baby inside of me i am not feeling the total loss yet.........and that scares me

 

josita - June 15

tonilee, when I came home from the first ultrasound I cried so much and went to my husband and he couldn't handle it either - at first he seemed impatient and not able to deal with my emotions. I dont think it is something that you will ever 'get over' quickly. I have days when all I think about is what happened, i try to talk to dh and he responds by 'I'm trying to move on.' For me, I couldn't or can't move on so easily and since I bled for so long, it was a constant reminder everytime I went to the bathroom. It was my first pregnancy and I hate what happened, but there is nothing I can do and I know that this is something that I will never forget. my heart goes out to you, bc I know exactly what you are going through... it is painful and mixed up with so many emotions despite all the pregnancy emotions that you have from the hormones --- it is unfair and nothing nice. keep your spirits up and stay strong... there are amazing women on this site that can lend support and encouragement... keep us informed of whats going on...

 

DownbutnotOUT - June 15

I am so sorry for your lose Tonilee, I myself just lost my wee peanut. Had bleeding, went to the hospital they said things looked hopeful but it was the u/s that I knew. Even before they told me I knew myself deep down the baby had pa__sed, I was suppose to be 11weeks 1 day but the fetus was only 6 w 6 d. I kept up hope until I pa__sed clots, luckily I pa__sed the baby naturally no D&C. *hugz* keep the hope even though you feel the baby has died, miracles can and do happen. I pray that things turn out for you, take care of yourslef XoX

 

tonilee7 - June 27

Thanks for all your replies, it was confirmed last wednesday, it was defenetly dead it was a missed miscarriage, thats why there was no bleeding or cramping I had a d&c last wednesday just after I found out, now I am just looking forward to trying again.....thanks heaps for all your support

 

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