Confused-pg115126792518

5 Replies
Deirdra - June 25

I cant seem to control my immotions, and i feel so dependent on my DH and feel like i need him to be aorund constanyl that when he isnt i call him constantly...he gets upset, and yesterday he went out with a friend, told me i could come then told me i couldnt saying hed be gone like an hour and then was gone from like 5 to 11pm...which isnt late i know...btu i feel alseep and had a bad dream something happened to him, and he didnt hanser his phone from like 8to 1030pm when he finally called, so by then im panicing and stuff...anyways so he comes home and we get into a huge blow out and i sware im going insane...i couldnt stop crying and i was rocking back and forth and hypervetalating...im 23 weeks pregnant...and i know its not good...but i just feel so depressed...like my DH doesnt like me, i mean i know he loves me....but does he like me? ya know b/c he always wants to be with his friends but not me...im beginging to feel huge...and i try to look nice for him, but its like he doesnt notice...and i cry myself to sleep...i dont know? anyone understand or can help? i dont know exactly what im looking for...im just so damn confused....

 

Aviendha416 - June 25

Seems like you are on the hormonal roller coaster ride that so often appears during pregnancy. As far as I know it's normal although you should check with your doctor to make sure there is nothing physical nderlying that might be exacerbating it. Have a chat with the hubby. He might be feeling smothered.

 

babydreams - June 25

Hi Deirdra: Hang in there! I've been having emotional fits lately too. Don't worry about your DH too much. I'm sure you're just reading into things. Try to focus on something else for a while, like getting the baby's room ready or another project in the house. Your DH may just feel a bit overwhelmed. You might suggest that the two of you go on a "date" or spend some quality time doing something. My husband has adopted this cute "you're the queen" policy to keep me content and unemotional. I'm thankful for his kindness during a stressful time. I need that, and I bet you do too! Why don't you ask your DH to do the same? You could say, in a level-headed way that you need him to be there for you right now -- 100 %. It's not that you're trying to control him or boss him around; but, like me, you probably just need to be a little more rea__sured than usual at this stage in your life (pregnancy!). A good hubbie will recognize this and change his ways. I'm sure yours will! Good luck and hang in there. I'll say a prayer for you.

 

ThePezChick - June 26

I've been feeling a little fat and unattractive lately. I told my husband how I felt and told him I'd probably need a little more rea__surance over the next bit because of the pregnancy. He's not used to this because I'm typically very secure with myself. We talked about the pregnancy hormones and he's made very tremendous effort to be understanding and helpful. We've been doing the date thing too. I think you also need to understand that you're pregnant but that you're both going through this. Understand his need to get away and have time with his friends as well... without you calling constantly (as hard as that may be). You need to do the same. Girlfriends are great for venting, telling all the c___p you're going through, taking your mind off things, etc. without having to continually unload on your husband. It works for me! Good luck and know that what you're going through is normal.

 

venus_in_scorpio - June 26

i feel ya's there!!!! I have put on a lot of weight so far im 19 weeks today and im still not that big but still... and I have this skinny large b___sted (not to mention s___tty) friend who hangs out at my husband's band practices because she's "dating" the ba__sist... (yeah right she has a man in every town she spends more than a day in) and we got into a huge fight the other night when he was going out because i mentioned (and I went OUT OF MY WAY not to sound b___hy) that she makes me uncomfortable and instead of gently rea__suring me like normal he got all defensive and was like WTF why dont you trust me and why do you have to take away the one thing i enjoy (his band) and i was like im not i just dont understand why its such a big deal to you if there truly is nothing for me to worry about. i know its silly and paranoid and o DO trust him i just know her and shell play mind games with me like "ohh i saw your man last night" UGH! well he did end up apologizing but its still annoying that he cant just understand i feel a little insecure now. i never was when I was 125 pounds but 20 lbs later im like OK i hate skinny people LOL

 

venus_in_scorpio - June 26

oh and theres always "why doesnt he care enough about my feelings to say no to going out with the gys so he can hang out with me??" I know its unreasonable but STILL! (and he actually has done that twice without prompting...) im thinking maybe after awhile they learn how much easier it is NOT to send you into a psycho-b___h rage... hes like hmm is going out with the guys worth the trouble..

 

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