Is Anyone Else Worried About What Kind Of Mother They Will B

7 Replies
kazforrest - October 19

This is my first baby and at 18 weeks its just hit me that I will be a mother in a few months at the age of 37. the only thing I know how to do business, my career has been my focus and never planned to have kids and despite being unplanned I was happy once i got used to the idea but it all seems so scary now. I have no idea what to do, how to balance my businesses with a baby and being a good life partner to my husband to be. I dont feel maternal yet. Maybe im just not cut of for this but dont want to let this baby down. im reading books on what to do. My mum says it will come naturally but as i get closer im more scared. I want to be a good mum and role model.

 

Mel Page - October 19

Kazforrest, I don't think that you should be worried. I'm also having my first bub (a girly) and I'm 21 weeks along. I'm just as nirvous and exited in one go!! I'm gonna be a single mom, and dont intend on marrying the dad either. But you know what, I just know that as soon as doc put's my little angel in my arms, that all will be good!!! I trust in God enough to know that he will guide me, through my mom and friends who already do have kids!!! And in His own other special ways!!! Just sit back and relax and enjoy this little life growing inside you!!! It's so gonna be worth it when we hold them for the first time!!! Do you know if your having a boy or a girl yet?? Love Melony

 

Astra - October 19

I think it's so normal to have fears and doubts. This is my first baby too. I'm almost 33 and desperately want to be a good mother. Having worked with families and children I know that it is the hardest job that is out there, but I also believe that if you have a lot of love and good intentions everything will be fine. Just wanting to be a good mother makes a big difference. As for being a business women, I have a close friend who is a real power woman herself and she has two children and is one of the most amazing mothers I know. You also don't have to figure out everything right now, it's ok to learn how to balance when the time comes. I think it's great that you are reading about parenting and development, it can only help you feel more prepared and also know that you will have your maternal instincts too.

 

corbin289 - October 19

Your not alone I think it is very normal to feel the way your feeling. With my first he wasnt planned either. I knew I always wanted kids but we had just gotten married and planned on waiting. About half way through my pregnancy I started thinking the same thing. I have no idea what I'm doing what if I cant do this but like the other women said as soon as you hold your baby it just all comes to you. It is really unexplainable. I mean you will have a million questions but the love you will have for someone you have never met is so crazy! So try not to worry to much about it you will be great!

 

cynthia502 - October 19

I am 39 and pregnant with babies 4 and 5.....had my first at 26, second at 29 and 3rd at 37. I remember waiting and wondering what kind of mom I would be and how I would handle everything. (Actually, I am wondering that now as I just found out I am carrying twins! ha ha)..... It's amazing, something kicks in once your baby gets here.....it may not be that instant joy of "I am a mom and am so excited, let's go home and be a family!" It may take a few days to sink in. I remember my mom being here for the 1st week my 1st was born and I was scared to let her go home...but she did go and you know what we were just fine. You figure it all out. Your family life and dynamics will be different from everyone elses. Use books and advice as guidance, but you learn by doing and caring for your precious gift.. Will you make some minor mistakes....most likely, but they will help you become a better mommy. You will love your baby and his or her unique personality from the moment you see them. But you will be amazed at how much your love and affection, and confidence will grow with each pa__sing day. Good luck!!!

 

cynnababy - October 19

Yes, me! This is my first one too, and I am the youngest child too. I have no experience with babies or young kids except the occasional time with my friend's baby. I have not babysat any babies, or kids before. I am very very scare and afraid that I will be a bad mom. I felt so overwhelm everytime I read a magazine on parenthood, and start looking shopping list for my baby. I am very worry, but my DH is so relax, and he keep on a__suring me that I will be a great mom. Luckily, my mom will be coming over to help me when the baby is born.

 

evae777 - October 19

melony, that is admirable that you are going to be a single mom! and dont feel likeyou have to marry the father. and kazforrest.. yes, i know how it is to have a great career. it's hard to readjust that focus. i ended up being SAHM. it was all or nothing for me.so that is great you will be balancing both. i definitely think there is a healthy balance to it but also benefits of being a SAHM as well. YOu mentioned "husband to be" when are you getting married? that is alot of change all at once. I got married while pregnant and quit my job after 3 months of pregnancy. i think that it is fine you are detached from the whole motherhood thing right now. we don't always have to be wrapped up so tightly in our worries. when the time is right you will feel maternal. i dont feel maternal either, i felt guilty for it for awhile, i would look in the mirror and not recognize the belly that i see everyday and i am 28 weeks along. when peope ask me when i'm due it catches me off guard and i think, "is it that noticeable!" duhhh!! the fact you realize your worries is enough to know that you are fully aware of what is going on and when the time comes you will handle it well. i mean... to be successful in your career takes a lot of determination. just take some of that and aim it towards your family and you will be just as successful. and you will find an amazing amount of empowerment once you get it all down. dont worry.. just remember there is a human growing inside you that will revere you in a way that your a__sociates won't. hope you feel better!

 

kazforrest - October 19

Girls, I cant tell you how much all that helps, this week i have been driving myself mad. I think its a boy i will no for sure in a few week but my ob was fairly sure at 12 weeks. We planned to get married last year but my dad died and i didnt feel ready, then this happened - the best laid plans! I do know i love him more than anything. Evae- im the same i look in the mirror and do recognise myself, my bust double the size and my waist is starting to dissipate.

 

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