Is Your Mum As Mad As Mine

12 Replies
sophandbob - May 30

My mother is being a constant state of amusement to me during my pregnancy, and wondered if this might be a grandma to be thing, or if it is just my nutty mother. You may have read what my mum said when I told her I was pregnant and gave her my due dates ("You do realise I am on holiday then, don't you?") but there have been other little gems too. Such as "Can you not hold your stomach in?", when my bump started to show!

 

venus_in_scorpio - May 30

im so sorry! how rude. my mother has been good so far but my MIL (whos actually his grandmother) has been like that the whole time. i said i think its a boy so she said girl. i said im not ready to talk about it, so she throws an announcement party. i KNOW YOUR PAIN!!

 

Perl - May 30

Your mother sounds like she doesn't think before she speaks, my mother on the other hand is downright rude and mean. Yes, my mother is strange but I'm so not amused. I mentioned this on another discussion: when I told my mother that I wasn't sure if I could take a 2 hour drive (each way) on a major highway by myself to go visit my recuperating grandmother in the hospital because of my nausea and dizziness, mom's solution was to bring a big plastic barf bag and a change of clothes so I could change after I vomitted on myself in the car during the drive. Thanks for your concern mom. ***When she asked me if I could feel the baby yet at 13 weeks into pregnancy and I told her 'no not yet' she immediately suggested something was wrong with my baby. If I didn't know any better I would have really freaked out.

 

sophandbob - May 30

I mean, give my mum her due she has been so great in other ways. Helped mop my tears when i thought i'd lost the baby, and has brought every baby item within a 10 mile radius, and has practically got me everything off 'the list', even tho i've not asked. But her little outbursts every now and then make me smirk, and wonder why!

 

mcatherine - May 30

We were visiting my MIL when I was 18 weeks and my feet and ankles were so swollen that it scared me. It hurt to stand or walk on them. While I was talking to my husband about calling the doctor, she just interjected her two cents worth and told me I should stop whining, just get over it and get on about enjoying the day they had planned (a baseball game in which they wanted me to play third base). When I got home the next night, feet and ankles still swollen - I called my doc and he met me at his office. He said that amount wasn't normal at 18 weeks, my blood pressure was through the roof and told my husband it was a good idea to avoid taking me to his parents again until after the baby was born. Guess who's feet and ankels haven't swelled in the least in over 8 weeks? Also, we live 5 hours away and she wanted to know if we will be bringing the baby to see her and family within two weeks after the birth so everyone would get the "newborn effect." I'm not sure what to credit the behavior to - I just stopped talking to her so I didn't have to deal with it!

 

Jennifer28 - May 30

Ladies- I am so glad I stopped in on this thread. I am so sorry for the mean and insensitive remarks from your moms and mil's. My mother - 1st time grandmother - has been driving me insane w/ spoiling me and wanting to touch my tummy and now I feel really bad b/c I have been short w/ her at times. You all have made me realize it could be much worse and I should appreciate my mom a lot more than I do. Thanks, girls. Again, I am so sorry for what you have to deal with. Good luck to you all!! :)

 

mcatherine - May 30

Jennifer28 - it's sounds like you are lucky. Sophandbob's mom, although with a few slips of the tounge, seems to be genuine at heart, too. My mother pa__sed three years ago, so I have nothing to compare my MIL's behavior to, really. I try not to complain about her (I try...). She did offer to buy the furniture for the baby's room and I was so touched I bragged about it to everyone for a week. Then, she sent my husband an email at work and told him that after she thought about it -she didn't really like the furniture we had picked out, it sounded too hard to put together, she thought it should be a different color and maybe could we reconsider the style of the crib to something more traditional. She attached a list of the sets she liked and told him she would make her final decision that weekend because she really wanted to give us this gift. I mean, how do you respond to something like that?

 

CamysMama - May 30

Well, I think I'm very lucky, because my mom has been nothing but super-supportive since we first told her, even though we're not married yet! My soon-to-be-MIL, however, immediately started telling horror stories of my fiance's birth... he has a fraternal twin, who began to crown first, but my fiance's leg was sticking out, in the way, so they **pushed** his brother back up, and pulled my fiance out first! AAARRRGGG! And then both boys were each 8 1/2 pounds... can you imagine carrying 16 pounds of baby? Holy cow!

 

Mingill - May 30

I've got the opposite problem. My mother lives 8 hours away and even though I know she's excited about her first grandchild, she doesn't really show it. She was the same when I got married. I want her to be more involved and she's keeping her distance because she doesn't want to be meddling. I don't have a MIL, she pa__sed away before hubby and I met.

 

Erynn21 - May 30

Oh the insanity of family, my problem is my step-mom she is a complete b*tch. I am going to have a nervous breakdown from her and my baby shower that she is holding. This is all about her being a grandmother it really has nothing to do w/ me except i guess I'm the one who's carrying the baby. That fact doesn't seem to really phase her, I want my Mom to do the cakes and food, which has been explained numerous times. I don't really know what to say, yesterday when I said this same thing again she said, "Well I AM the one throwing this shower." Oh lord please help me before I completely lose it. She never has given a rats a** about me and now it still seems to not really be about me and the baby, it's all her glory. I could go on and on, at least I told her she is stressing me out. I had to vent, thanks ladies. Please pray for my sanity.

 

Newhoneybuns - May 31

I guess i am one of the lucky ones. But wasnt always like that. My mom is the kinda person that would say anything to put you down (even to us her kids). She's a very negative person but since i have told her i was pregnant it all changed. At first she was scared and being all negative saying we weren't a lucky family and i would have a misscariage (cause i had 2 a few years ago). But now OMG ! she's like super grandma she helps with everything always tells me to sit down and not do this and not do that. When i came home with the pictures from the ultrasound last friday we were both jumping from joy, crying and holding each other which i never seen lol Our child is the first in my family and the first in my bf's family as well. I dont have much trouble with MIL since she's the one that wished for that baby lol She has Multiple Sclerosis (for 21 years now) and she wished to see her grandkids before she can no longer do so. But i guess i am not shy enough and when they do say something wrong i tell them to take a 10 minute break lol Anyways i feel bad for you ladies out there but in a way i fully understand how you feel cause my mom was that way before i got pregnant. I hope all your moms and MIL will come to their senses :)

 

Erynn21 - May 31

Oh I'm lucky in every other way, I have a great Mom and MIL, and are supportive of us. My step-mom is just a psycho control freak, she just wants all this really dumb stuff for this shower. I am caught in the middle of everything, she called to find out what is going on w/ my mom, she left a nasty message on my mom's phone I'm convinced she's crazy. I personally have to look on the bright side if I had that and a crazy MIL you may as well send me away because I would go insane. This is her first grandchild I give her that, but to be so obsessed w/ this shower when she really hasn't given me the time of day for 20 yrs, AUGHHH, it makes me wants to scream. I really hate being in this situation I wish I lived far away so this wouldn't be an issue, but she's only 10 min away, so that doesn't work. Oh well, I guess this party is for her, I just am some kind of status symbol w/ a big ol' belly.

 

mcatherine - May 31

Erynn21 - I feel bad for you being caught in the middle. Since my mom pa__sed, my MIL thinks she should get everything her way simply by default. She's the same way with my shower - doesn't matter what anyone says. It's her day to shine! I try my hardest to be grateful, but she makes it very hard to do. I am 5 hours away and it isn't far enough......

 

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