Lets Give It A Shot

12 Replies
seanandmya - February 22

Ok , so I don't think dh grasps the enormity of pregnancy , He doesn't understand to be sensitive when I'm haveing a mood swing or that I might be just as tired as him at the end of the day because looking after a 4 year old and a one year old and keeping the house clean is not exactly an easy job while being 23 weeks preggers , so I had a brain wave ! Later on Im going to force him to sit in front of this computer and read any posts you ladies have left giving any advice you might feel appropriate ! His name is Alan by the way . I just think that some stuff will sink in a bit better if he hears it from someone besides me . You see if I say it it's nagging ! MEN ! Im just looking for a bit of sympathy sometimes , You know like ' you look tired sweetheart , let me put the kids to bed ' or would you like a backrub ?' . he's just being a typical man , but I feel like he should have gotten it by now , this is number three ! A little compassion please ! wow there are a lot of exclamation marks ! thanks ladies

 

c_baer19 - February 22

I'm guessing I should direct this to him? Haha. Alan, I don't have any little ones at home right now, and I can't imagine how I'd function if I did! I work from home, about 5-6 hours a day, and still struggle to keep the house clean and get everything done before my husband gets home from work. Most of the time, it's not clean - I just don't have the time and I don't move quite as quickly as I did! And I'm only 18 weeks pregnant, not 23! I can't imagine have two little ones, especially a one year old, running around and needing care while I'm trying to get everything else done. I'd go crazy! All you have to do is be a litte understanding and a little sympathetic - a little goes a long way. =)

 

sarahd - February 22

Alan, although pregnancy is a wonderful time, it's also a very EXHAUSTING time. I don't have any other kids, and I also work from home, but I'm just dead tired by the end of the day. Also, our hormones go wild, so a little extra sympathy and compa__sion can go a LONG way. So much is happening to our bodies in such a short time, it can be a little rough a times. (Ha - now I should get my own husband to read this post, lol!)

 

lily10 - February 22

Alan, please try to be a little more understanding. This is my first pregnancy and I have to say I really never understood it until now. It really is exhausting and i can't even imaginine how exhausting it would be taking care of a 1 and 4 year old!!! Please try to do something nice for your wife at least once a week, it doesn't have to be big but like she already mentioned putting the kids to bed etc, it would mean so much to her. I think if you made this effort you would notice much less "nagging".

 

seanandmya - February 22

Thanks you guys , appreciate it . Your hubbies are probably the same , it must be a hard thing to understand for a man . Are your hubbies showing interest in your pregnancies , like asking questions and googling stuff at all ? Just curious : D

 

ophelia73 - February 22

This is my first, I will be 25 weeks on Sunday. I don't have other kids, but I do work a 40-hour week outside the home. My husband works 50-60 hours a week on third shift, and on Friday's he spends the day cleaning. I feel terribly lazy for not contributing more, but growing a baby is HARD WORK!! I am exhausted, sore, achy and starting to swell, so my feet hurt like hell by the end of the day. Women need encouragement, and to be told they are still beautiful. We need to be given a little bit of slack temporarily! My husband checks each week on the internet to see what week we are on & how big baby girl is. He checks to see what's going on with my body, and the one time he said I might feel better if....... I told him when he had lived inside my body for a week, then he could offer advise. Since then, he has been very supportive and doesn't offer "helpful" advise so much!!

 

lily10 - February 22

I really don't want any helpful "advice" from my fiance. When I first became pregnant I would express concern about weight gain, my fiance would tell me about the pregnant woman at his gym working out and staying in shape. That was his way of trying to get me to workout. I couldn't even imagine working out in my first trimester it took all I had to get up and go to work everyday, but he just did'nt get it. They have no concept of how we feel. Another time when I had bad MS my fiance said isn't it a little soon for that, OBVIOSLY NOT becasue I'm not making up the fact that I feel like death. For the most part he is very supportive and helpful, no he does not google anything about pregnancy but he does show interest and excitment when I tell him things and he voluntarily comes to all the doctors appointments. With that being said, there have been times when he was pretty insensitive and that drove me crazy.

 

Diva647 - February 22

Hey Alan - the 8 best words you can say to a woman knee deep in little kids & house work (preggers or not) are: HERE SWEETIE LET ME DO THAT FOR YOU. trust me on that you'll get all kinds of goodness from your wife if you help her out w/out being asked!!!!

 

seanandmya - February 22

god pregnant woman all about ye

 

seanandmya - February 22

never mind that last comment , he lacks a sense of humour , its his disability ! These posts actually made a difference , I asked him if he really got it and he said yes so we'll see if anything changes !

 

wailing - February 24

Seanandmya, like the other ladies on this post I am absolutely AMAZED at the fact that u have 2 kids, are 23 wks preg and still think about cleaning the house. You are seriously a HERO. I thought I was being a trooper and now I feel LAZY!!!! I'm 24 wks w/ my 1st baby, and am only working part time, which I thought was torture. Honestly if Alan doesn't totally appreciate u, just know there are 100's of women out there that commend u:) I'm going to tell my other "new mom" girlfriends about u first thing tmrw!!! HAHA. Ps. I told my daddy-to-be that I was going to make him go to the gym, work out til he was sore, tie a 25lb bag to his belly and make him walk around ALL DAY so he could get a feel for how I am on a reg. basis. I think we should invent somthing like that for all men to go thru!!!!!

 

seanandmya - February 24

aww wailing , thanks ! I have a big huge smile on my face now , probably for the day . NIce to be appreciated . And you are a trooper ! Being preggers is hard work by itself , never mind adding a part time job aswell !

 

kimberly - February 24

I have a 3 and an 8 year old now and am 13 weeks pregnant. I work part time and it is so exhausting! I know how you feel...I feel so tired and sick all the time that I can't hardly get out of bed to get my oldest ready for school and my youngest off to preschool and then off to work in the mornings. I do manage but gosh if my husband had to do it , I don't think he could. He works night 3 days a week and days the other 2, so he usually is gone when I need his help. Then when I come home from picking my youngest up and to make sure my oldest retuns from school there is the house work. I feel exactly how you do, I just wish for once I would come home and find my house already cleaned so I could just lay back and do nothing for a while!!

 

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