My Husband Doesn T Want To Have A Baby But I Do

471 Replies
anaonmy - February 19

my husband refuses to make love and have s_x with me and i want to have a baby. he doesn't. what should i do?

 

To Anaonmy - February 19

Don't force him into it. Let him come around on his own. If s_x is what you want.....do all you can do to entise him. Make yourself irresistable to him but whatever you do use protection. You do not wanna force parenthood on anyone. I wish you the best of luck :O)

 

To anaonmy - February 20

He doesn't want a baby NOW or he doesn't EVER want a baby? There could be a big difference.

 

-Anonymous - April 11

I know how you feel, I really want a Baby and my Husband says he's not ready, I get really frusterated sometimes but I know he'll come around when he's ready... my point... your Husband will come around when he's ready!

 

lou - May 1

my husband is the same. If it wasnt for failed contraception and a daughter from my previous relationship we wouldn't of had any. I would like another one but he does not. I know people will say be lucky with what I have, that does not change the fact I want another one! Good luck to you.

 

hurt - June 5

My husband is the same way. I feel so lonely inside also. I suggest that you wait another year and then tell him that you do want children and that he lied to you so therefore you have given him enough of a chance to possibly adjust to wanting children. You can not continue to stay in a manipulative marriage and be happy. You will eventually become very resentful towards your husband. I wish you well. Whatever, you decide please consider you future mental health.

 

drink bleach - June 7

your husband would probably hate you for the rest of your life and leave you if you tried to force this on him. DONT force this, you're more than likely going to regret it.

 

anonymous - September 1

Leave him. Your value system, goals and dreams are mismatched. This should have been addressed before the marriage. But I discussed this with my husband prior to marriage, and he said he wanted a family. But his behavior has never been in support of that. Now I'm running out of time (I'm 38) and decided to get divorced....something I should have done years ago. If you look deeper, you know this isn't the only problem here. The core problem is lack of respect for values and needs.

 

Allie - September 23

Im in the exact same boat, my husband says hes content with our two but I still want one more, he is now refusing to have s_x at all and Im so frusterated- we had a deal to have one more and now hes backing out of the deal...Im dont want it to come to a divorce because we have a great marriage...aside from the baby arguments. I think if I tricked him into getting pregnant he would accept it and love the baby when it gets here...

 

Justina Ivey - September 23

Just simply talk it over and wait until you are both ready for a baby. When you are both ready then go ahead and do it. But you have to be ready to accept the responsibility and maybe he is afraid of the responsisbility of a baby. So try and just wait.

 

ginamarie - October 7

I know exactly how you feel! My husband is stressed out about money and feels we won't be ready financially. I have always thought that nobody is ready financially, but I have this feeling that everything will work out. Am I wrong for feeling this way? I want a baby in the worst way. I am 33 years old. My clock is ticking too. We have phenomenal s_x as long as we use condoms. I have been wishing for this for 7 years. When do I stop wishing and decide what to do next?

 

ll - October 8

Divorce him and find another guy who want a family..I know a lady who divorce her man cuz he is infertile.

 

to anaomy - October 16

I know how all of you feel! My husband was the one that told me to stop taking birth control. Then he changed his mind and says he is not ready to have a baby. He won't even have s_x because he's afraid that it might just happen. He knows how much I want to make a baby with him and how important it is to me to be a mommy. I am being pacient with him and waiting for him to tell me when he is ready but what about my needs and my dreams? It seems like it is all about him and his wants. How would he feel if he was in my place? I see babies and belly's everywhere.

 

domi - October 16

Answer: is he refusing to have s_x bc he is afraid of getting pregnant or what? I can relate. I am 32, my husband is 35. We agreed that we would wait 2 more years to have kids because of financial concerns. But recently, like the past year, my bio clock is ticking out of control and I want to start trying now. I told him this and he said that when we are making a certain amount of money, he can't argue it because that's his only concern. When I did the math, we were already there, with more than enough money to have a baby, even twins. He then backed down saying that he was tired when he'd said that and he wants to wait one year to start trying. He admitted that it wasn't about the money, but obviously he has fears about his life changing and feels that he'd be resentful if we started now. He feels we had originally agreed to that and that he doesn't want to be "bullied" or manipulated and wants to go a day w/out talking about it!! I don't want to drive him crazy, I want to have a child w/ someone who is excited about it, but all I think about every day is having a baby!!! Am I crazy? 2 friends are having babies this month and I feel jealous which I hate!!!!!! HeLP!

 

hurt - October 16

I am so sad to hear all of these problems. I thought for a while it was just me who had this problem. To be realistic there is nothing we can do. If we manipulate our husbands into having a baby. We will be jeopardizing the welfare of our future child. No child deserves to be not wanted 100%. Trust me I know from personal experience. The only thing we can do after trying to talk to them is either leave or accept the unaccetable. I suggust no woman put down her beliefs.

 

waiting - October 16

Yes,the reason my husband dosen't want to have s_x is because he is afraid that I might get pregnant and dose not want to have a baby. I feel regected by him. I am trying so hard to understand him and let him adjust to changes. Do alot of men go through and how can we help them adjust?

 

waiting - October 16

My husband feels pressured because I want to have a child. It's so hard not to talk about it because it is what I want so much. I have several friends that are are having babies or just had a baby. One thing I find helpful it to get excited about their pregnancys and new babies. I tell my husband about their exciting news and how I am truly happy for them. He see's how my eyes light up when I talk about them and knows that that's what I want too, someday. For now, since he isn't ready, we can spend each day enjoying each other and growing closer. Maybe, in some ways, If I just stop bugging him, only talking about other babies once in a while- not the one I want to have, it will help him not feel so pressured. When I feel the need to talk about having a baby I need to talk to a girlfriend or go for a walk, just not be around him because I know the more I talk about it the more he pushes me away. He isn't ready and I need to try and except that. Ahhh, It is easier said then done. But I am really trying. I'll let you know if it works.

 

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