Would It Be Wrong Toh Ave Another ABORTION

47 Replies
Flick - October 12

I'm 23 and just found out I'm pregnant. I dont want a baby yet, I'm not ready, have nowhere to live (still at home with mum) have a huge pile of debts (so could never afford to give up work) and my boyfriend isn't ready either - we love each other and plan to spend the rest of our lives together but he is in the same position as me...no money and no home of his own. I had an abortion when I was 20 and did say I would never get myself into that position again, but this really wasn't my fault I am on the pill, its not like Ii was being unresposible. Who thinks it would be wrong of me to abort again?? (And please dont suggest adoption...I have already decided not to do that!)

 

my story - October 12

I have had 2 abortions (age 18 & age 20) and do not regret it one bit. I regret getting knocked up in the first place but made up my mind to change my act. I knew I had to abort b/c the man who fathered my children would be in my life for eternity. I could not stand that thought as we were already falling apart. I knew I wanted to clean up my behavior and one day marry and have a baby with someone I was commited to. Good luck and I hope my story can help you in some way. I am now married and in my 30's with a healthy baby on the way. We have money to take care of the baby too. XOXO!

 

my story - October 12

Oh and we are soooo in love to this day. Feels good to have waited for the right man and time.

 

Flick - October 12

Thanks for our reply. Sounds like you are really happy, good on you! I have no doubts about my man, we have been together for 2 years now and are more inlove than ever, its just the situation I'm not comfortable with. We want to have children when we are ready and finacially comfortable with our home! I think Ive probably made my mind up already if I'm honest.

 

my story - October 12

I did not want you to think I was comparing your story to mine... I realize you may have totally different circ_mstances but I just wanted to share what happened to me. Good luck and be well:) The hardest part is the shame I still feel to this day. Still, I would rather feel this shame than to have exacerbated my "mistakes" by having the babies. I know people will write to say I am a selfish b___h and am going to hell. They could be correct, but frankly I do not care what they think.

 

Misty - October 12

Do what you feel is right in your heart. There is nothing you more you could have done to prevent the pregnancy, you were on the pill. Unfortunatly, sh*t happens. If you are not ready, you're not ready. Hope all goes well.

 

just being honest - October 12

I understand that you said youw ere on the pill... but still they said they aren't 100% acurate to keep you from being pregnant. So it is kind of your fault that you are pg. If you didn't want to take the chance of being pg you shouldn't have odne aynthing, or used a condom too, along with the pill and whatever else. I'm all against abortion... you're killing another human. It's a baby no matter how many days weeks or months. It's alive. But.. I'm not you, I don't have to answer for your actions one day, just my own. But whatever your choice I will keep you in my prayers. I mean, I'm not ready for a baby eithr... and I know my parents would die if I even wound up pg. But I still would never abort the baby. But like I said, tha's just me. later days

 

Flick - October 13

Well I'm suprised you said 'dont do anything' I know the pill isn't 100% affective but lets be realistic I'm hardly not gonna have s_x with my boyfriend ever am I. And as for using condoms, well I suppose, but I think realisticy again its not gonna happen everytime when you are in a full time relationship. Therefore I have to say that I think you were a little harsh to saythat it was my fault that I got pregnant! I respect your opinon about being against abortion, but just not that it was my own fault.

 

2 flick - October 13

How far along are you??? and y wouldnt u consider adoption??? thats stupid, u should ALWAYS consider it...at least you would be giving your child a life and probably a good one at that...what about letting your mother or someone in your family take the baby??? as for my opinion on your ?, yes it would be wrong...

 

Re: 2 flick - October 13

2 flick - She obviously considered adoption which is why she stated it is not an option for her. Not everyone is able to carry a baby for 9 months and then give it away to a stranger. That is a difficult thing to do, for anyone in any situation.

 

oh well... - October 13

she should give it a LOT more consideration...now if she carries it for 9months and then have second thoughts about giving it away..then thats a good thing, she should have it by her side anyway...and also babygirl, if you find adoptive parents while she's early in her pregnancy, they will be with her the entire 9months so they wont be complete strangers to her, have u thought about that??? didnt think so!

 

Flick - October 14

I know that adoption is a brilliant thing for people that want but cannot have children and also for unwanted children to find a great home, but really I couldn't do it. I already know that to carry a child for 9 months and give birth to it I wouldn't be able to give it away, I cvouldn't live knowing that the child is out there somewhere. So for me to not have a termination the only other option is keeping it myself. But then not being able to support it the way I would like to....not having a home...or any money....no career to help set up a good future for the child!! Thank you for all your opinions, but I think I've probably answered my own question - I'm not ready!

 

Re: oh well - October 14

knowing someone for 9 months under the pretense that they want your baby and are doing everything possible to impress you, does not mean you truly know who they are. Whether its a complete stranger or a partial stranger does not make a difference for some women. Last, just b/c you carry a baby to term with the intention of adoption, but decide to keep it, does not mean it was meant to be. Sounds whimsical to me. That is about the worst planning I have ever heard. Glad you are doing what you feel is right Flick! Good luck girlfriend!

 

Brandy - October 14

NO morally it is wrong... ever hear of a condom??? or the Pill? your 23 years old stop acting so immature and get some responsiblity

 

re brandy - October 14

Brandy, ever hear of reading a post completely??? She was on the pill.

 

to Flick - October 14

you had an abortion already??? i'm pretty sure u were in the same situation as now, my advice is...either BOTH of you use protection or DO NOT have s_x at all if your pills arent workin....thats disgusting how you just keep getting pregnant and having an abortion like you're getting rid of a cold... and to my story..you just need slapped one good hard time.

 

Flick - October 15

I AM ON THE PILL.....its not my fault the poxy thing didn't work. The first time I got pregnant I was partly to blame because due to illness I was on antibiotics, and I wasn't aware that they could stop the pill from working. I have taken the pill correctly ever since the abortion (which is 3 years now) and it has worked perfectly fine, I wasn't to knwo that at some point it wasn't going to. So you can quit blaming me for falling pregnant. The bottom line is - I AM pregnant and theres no changing that now. I wasn't asking advice on contraception because in my eyes I was using it correctly!!!! And as for getting stuck into 'my story' well just because you dont agree with somebody's way of life or decesions, doesn't mean they need a good slapping, I think you need to grow up there!!!

 

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