Length Of Time Between Siblings

5 Replies
mtnlass - June 23

I would just like some personal stories, opinions and whatever. I'm having a hard time conceiving # 3 and struggling with the time gap that is widening everyday. My other children are 9 (he just turned) and almost 5. I told myself I'd only try for a year, then I'd only try till dd is in Kindergarten but now I'm obsessed with getting pregnant. My husband has the att_tude that if we get pg then we do, if we don't we don't and there's no need to use bc. But I don't know how long I can go just wondering and hoping that this is the month. I'm also concerned with the age gap. I'm the second oldest of 9 (split family). My mom had six, the baby is 12 years younger than me. I moved out of the house when she was 6 so I'm not as close to her as I would love to be. I also don't live close. I just fear my children would end up the same. I thought we were only going to have two then dh changed his mind. I always said I wasn't going to have more than three so I wouldn't need to buy a minivan(this was back before they had the cool minivans) and to please husband who didn't grow up with children I compromised and said if we have a boy and girl then that will be it. Now he doesn't care and of course now I can't seem to get pg. My kids are very excited about becoming big sister/brother so at the moment gap between age isn't a problem. Thanks for letting me vent and for your stories.

 

mtnla__s - June 24

I guess noone has any stories. Oh well.

 

Lin - June 24

I don't have any stories, but to be honest, I don't think it's too much of a gap. At least the younger two will still be relatively close in age. My ex-bf is 6 years younger than his sister, and they feel like they grew up together. The 9 year old might not be *as* close, but since the age gap between him and the next isn't huge, there will still be a close enough connect to tie them all together - the older two by their not-so-huge age gap and the younger two by their not-so-huge age gap. To be honest, no matter what the age situation is in a family, between parents and kids or between kids, whether or not it all works out depends a LOT on the parents. I have a friend who is far younger than all her siblings, and her parents are very old as parents with respect to her. She does seem a bit disconnected from some of her older siblings, but they still have a great relationship. It's just different from those who grew up close in age and is a bit closer to being an only child. She also seems to have a bit of a hard time relating to her older parents, but to be honest, I think that's their fault. I do think that older parents should make an extra effort to keep up with the times to be able to relate to their children. I say go for it. So long as you're good parents, it doesn't really matter how close together in age your children are.

 

LN030905 - June 24

Mtnla__s...just wanted to tell u my story ..When I was 4 my parents had my brother...they decided to stop with the two of us..then when I was 15 my parents found out mom was preg by accident...so..im 15 yrs older than my little brother. Its a complete BLESSING! I love having a brother that young. To be quiet honest..having a screaming baby around while I was in high school made me not want to have s_x and to be very careful when I did! LOL...He keeps my parents young! I think if you want to have another child..then do it. If it isnt meant to be then it wont! But children at any age are blessings!!!

 

sarahd - June 24

I mtnla__s - I don't have a personal story, but my best friend was blessed with a little sister when we were 15 years old - it really truly was a blessing. They are extremely close, and the whole family was very happy with it. Hope that helps a little!

 

mtnla__s - June 26

Thanks for the stories. I guess as long as the family is wanting and willing to have a baby then there isn't a problem. I'm just hoping it happens soon because dd is killing me. She puts her ear to my belly says no baby in there yet. I think she gets more upset when my period comes then I do. It's been so long I've gone a bit numb. Thanks again.

 

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