Teen Pregnancy-pg112960079718

13 Replies
Mel - October 17

What is your opinion on teen pregnancy and what if a teen wants to become a mom?

 

Just me - October 17

I'd say just enjoy your youth. You have years to become a mother. It's hard enough to be a mother when you're older and stable...why bring hardships on yourself. Build yourself up to be a strong established woman so you can pa__s that onto your own children...later :)

 

Pepsi - October 17

Sweetie, I think if you're mature then you'll be ready. When I say mature, I mean, mature enough to know that a baby means giving up all of yourself and giving it to someone who may never say thank you. Having a baby means you're losing your "old self" to become the loving parent of this person who depends on you 100% for everything for a very long time. Mature means that you're willing to sacrifice financial, emotional, physical and material things in the name of love. Mature means that you have the finances and education, along with emotional stregnth, and an unsurpa__sed ability to love without condition, that it takes to raise a child to be happy and healthy. Mature means you have a support system in place that will help you when times get rough--the baby's father, your mother, friends, relatives, anyone who you know is there for you and will love that child as their own. Baby making is more than a notion. I'm not downing you for being a teen and wanting to be preg--I started feeling the "urge" at 19, and now I'm 21, married, almost finished with college, gainfully employed, and finally "together", and the urge never went away. BUT--I was mature enough to wait until I knew I could dedicate my life--along with the life of my husband--to this little gift. If you can do all of these things, not some, but ALL, then you, my dear, are ready.

 

eab - October 17

Mel, Why do you ask?

 

Mel - October 17

Thanks for your response pepsi. I myself am 18 and have always had a maternal side(since playing with dolls at 5). As of now I am in college studying engineering. Recently, my bf and i had a scare that i was pregnant. When it came up false, i said i was releived. But honestly i was not. My friend is also pregnant, and i had honestly wanted to be a mother too. I felt capable of the love it would take. It would give my life meaning i never have known before. If u knew me personally ud understand. I feel like i shouldnt feel this way, yet i do. Am i wrong to feel such emotions?

 

eab - October 17

Mel, The reason I asked why would have to do with my response. I got pregnant at 20 and had my son at 21. I was alone and not married, I was not done with school and now at 28 I might finally go back to finish and get a 4 year degree. I am sill unmaried. And on my 21st birthday I did not even get to go to a bar and have a drink legally. I am not going to say that I have not been blessed with the most wonderful son in the word. And that I do not treasure him daily. But I also wonder if I am going to be able to pay for his college if he wants to go (PLEASE GOD) or even this chirstmas I am wondering if I can get him some nice gifts. I would do NOTHING to negate my sons exixtance. But I TRULY wish I had done more to give HIM the stuff I think he deserves. Give your son/daughter the best mother you can and not someone who will have to scrimp and sc___pe. Baby dust to store for when your schooling is done and a future for you and your child (oh and a father, my son even now I have to deal with the who is my father and did he love me beacue we were both so young and stupid)

 

eab - October 17

and mel you are not wrong to feel that way. But save it for the right time with a good job and a good man. Take the time to make youself the best mother you can be. And if you want it this bad now when the time is right you WILL be a great mom.

 

Tara - October 17

Hi. im 19 and just found out the i am pregnant. after reading these posts, im rethinking my choice of keeping the baby for fear i will lose my life and regret it, but i dont know if i can go through an abortion. any advice?

 

Pepsi - October 17

I agree with everything said here, and I'm so glad that you're not being bashed. I had a pg scare when I was 19, and it was then that I realized how strong the urge in me was to be a mother. There are some women, who can have a baby at 19, finish school, work hard, get married, and their children never have to go without, because they were able to make it. Then there are those who struggle. Tara, don't give up. An abortion can't be taken back, just like labor and delivery cant. Do you have any family who will help you? Is the father there? I ask these things because you really do need support. I'd advise you to find a hope pregnancy center, or even the telephone number, and talk to someone who knows a bit more. People on here will only give you their opinions, and that's not really what you need. I'm praying for you, that God will direct you in the right way to go. Mel, you're definately not wrong to feel that way, and if its so strong now, it will only get stronger in time. But, weigh all things with good judgment before you open yourself up to fully trying to conceive. And one good question to ask is: what does the father( to be) have to say about it? Is this something that your partner and you are thinking about, or just you alone? That's a major part. I hope I'm helping. Please keep us posted.

 

Dia - October 17

Hi Mel and Tara...I agree with the other posters on here...I am 23 and I am 6 weeks pregnant, married for 3 years, and am in Graduate school working on my Masters. Pregnancy is hard...I feel like I have a hangover everyday! However, Tara, I definitely think you would regret an abortion. I mean, you have to do what you feel is best, but you are already pregnant. This advice is directed towards Mel (in particular) b/c she is not yet pregnant, however, you are. And that is a blessing. Many, many people cannot have babies. Try to look at it this way...you are 19, and a mature adult. If you feel like this baby would be too much of a burden..think about adoption...hope this helps you some!! :)

 

Tara - October 17

Thanks for all the input. its nice to know that im not a lone in this and that im not viewed any differently. it def gives me something to think about.

 

To Tara - October 17

Dear Tara, for a start I have never been in your situation, so i can't speak thru experience, also i do not know wether your child has been concieved thru mutual agreed s_x, love-making or any other way for that matter. Growing up alot of my friends got pregnant at your age & younger ( iam 28 Now ), so their children are not babies any more. They too missed out on a few things in their younger life, but now, 10 - 12 years later, they would not change it for the world. One friend in particular had her first baby at 17 and then got preg again and had an abortion. She regrets it to this day. She said at the time, should could barely provide enough as a single mum for her son, let alone another baby. She now lives with that decision every day and it haunts her - She has had another son since but she still thinks about the baby she aborted (down the track if you decide you WANT a child, the one you might abort now can never be re-concieved or replaced). I personally believe that there is no right or wrong age to have a baby - (within in reason on the younger side of the scale). As far as i am concerned 19 is OK. (if you are TRULY ready). I know one thing that i have learned thru my firend is that the regret of missing a few nights of partying, drinking and a general good time or working or going to uni, is going to be nothing compared to the regret of having an abortion & not being 110% sure it is the right thing for you to do. I am Pro-Choice, no-one has the right to judge you for what ever decision you make. But Please PLEASE think about the few months to a couple of years of partying, working and uni versus a life time, with a child that will literally be a part of you and will be there to love you unconditionally. I hope everything works out for you wether you keep your baby, adopt it out, or abort it.

 

eab - October 17

Tara, Hello if you saw my earlier advice to Mel then you can see that was directed to somone who is not in the same boat I was 7 years ago. To date I do not regret ever having had my son. He is the biggest joy in the world to me. But had I had a place like this to go to and read adoption may have been a bigger option I would have though about. I see all of these women who want a child so badly. Them and there husbands and I think that if I were to get in that same boat again I woudl love to give some couple who maybe could not have a child a chance to be a parent. I can not go back in time and change what I did and now after 7 years of loving my son daily would NEVER give him up. But at the time had I known some of the women on this board I would have considered to some who's dr's or thru other reasons they could not have one on there own. I wish you the best of life with this decision and respect you and the fact that in the end the only decision is YOUR decision. These are just my thoughts about my decisions.

 

eab - October 17

Tara, in the end the choice is yours. And though I truly respect all the women here on this board if you do decide to have an abortion it is not anyones choice but yours. If you decied to give the child up for adoption the choice is yours. If you decied to keep the child the choice is yours. Not anyone but yours. All of my love to you as one who has been there and made one of many choices :)

 

ADD A COMMENT:


You must log in to reply.

Are you New to the forum? Sign Up Here! Already a member? Please login below.

Forgot your password?
Need Help?
New to the forum?

Sign Up Here!


Already a member?
Please login below.





Forgot your password?
Need Help?