Feel Like Im Not Going To Make It

11 Replies
Christine - August 11

Hi everyone. I have asked for advice several times on here and everyone has given good advice. But I am going thru such anxiety about having this baby on my own I feel like I am not going to make it. I feel like i made the wrong decision in keeping this baby. My ex left me for another woman when i was 3 months pregnant and now wish i would have had an abortion. What is wrong with me? I feel like there is no hope in site. How am i going to be able to take care of her and give her everything she needs without the father? I even considered suicide and adoption but those are options that dont seem realistic. I am 36 weeks and all i think about day and night is that I cant handle all that is coming my way. I have a lot of friends family therapist and all of them say " I can do this"! but im not convinced. I feel like once the babys born life will be a constant struggle and no man will ever want me. Plus my ex and his girlfriend keep calling me and harrassing me that I better be nice to both of them since my daughter will be them. I feel like I cant take it and Im not gonna make it. Hope is gone. I really messed up my life and my daughters life and I dont know how to accept things and get over it. Is anybody feeling like this? I cant sleep, I can hardley eat, Im barely getting any work done at work and Im having this baby in 4 weeks and I dont feel like I can do it. I know its too late, but I cant accept it. Im in denial. I want out! Help me get some sanity back. Thanks...Christine

 

Natalie - August 11

Christine - You will make it, because you have to make it. Think about all the people who you'd hurt (other than the stupid ex and the stupid new GF if you consider suicide. Please.) Although my baby's not here yet (I'm 22 weeks, and my BF of a year is now my ex, because of this pregnancy), I truly believe that once that precious baby is here, it will all make a whole lot more sense. And you're so close! Ask your doctor about safe (Cla__s B) anti-anxiety medication if its unbearable, really. Meantime, realize that you are wayy too close to the crisis to see things logically and put things into perspective right now, but have faith that time will change that. One day at a time, Christine, seriously. Think about some of the bad stuff from your past and how over those things you are now that time has pa__sed. Some of those crises from years ago probably seem pretty ridiculous to you now, right? Yes, it truly stinks to feel unloved and ditched at a time when we women should feel cherished and pampered. I can absolutely vouch for that. But wishing for that isn't going to make you feel better or serve as a magic wand and make a dumba__s come to his senses. Plus, just think, a lot of the people's lives that seem so much better on the surface, really have c___p going on behind the scenes that you have no idea about. There's no such thing as perfect. One day you will thank God for this baby, and thank God that some other woman got stuck with the loser who left you. Hang in there, really really really.

 

lift your head - August 11

Christine , i know right now you must feel so overwhelmed .Please don't give up ! Your baby needs you . Hope isn't gone you just feel alone ,please believe me when i say "you are not alone " . Your ex is a loser , plain and simple . Don't even consider him !! Take a deep breath .Are you a religious woman ? If so, give all your worries to God . He won't let you down . You are his child . Do not despair , that is the work of the devil .Be strong , so many women have been right where you are at one time or another . I know what i am talking about . I ,too, have been there . Reach out and rely on your family and friends . Your hormones are probably a little off right about now . I've been raising my 5 month old so alone . You can do it ! You just need faith . Faith is not thinking he can, but knowing he will . Please take care of youself & your little one ! Kim

 

Trini - August 13

Christine, you can definitely make it through this, and you will! I am also pregnant (about 24 weeks), and the father of my baby is out of the picture after I found out he cheated on me...I thought in the beginning that all would be great, and that having this baby would bring us closer together, because he vowed to always be there for me and the baby, and even wanted to get married, but I guess his true colors showed as the pregnancy progressed. At one point, I really did consider abortion, because I didn't want to be a single mother, and have to raise this baby alone, but I feel like kicking myself everyday for even thinking that. Children are a blessing, and God has given you this baby for a reason---in order to enrich this new life, and also for you to be enriched yourself. Don't punish this baby for the actions of it's father. This baby deserves a chance at life, and you are capable of providing a wonderful future for this child. Always pray and believe in God, because He will carry you through anything! And please try and take care of yourself, for the sake of the baby's health and your own! You will see that all was worth it in the end, even though things may look bleak now. Always have faith!

 

Melissa Cummings - September 14

Christine- please please consider adoption. Find a family that is looking for open adoption so you are apart of the babies life. If the pressure is too much now, it will be too much after the baby is born... Please take care of yourself you need to eat, sleep and see a doctor. When a person is sleep deprive that makes everything seem worse. Contact the police if they are harra__sing you. Do not try to do this alone. My husband and I would love to adopt a baby or child. Let me tell you a little about us. Our names are Melissa and John Cummings We live in a small town in Illinois. We have a 12 year old son. We would like to adopted an infant or young child. We live in a beautiful 4 bedroom, 4 bathroom home with a large wooded backyard. We have 3 dogs. We have a large close knit family with grandparents on both sides, aunts, uncles and cousins. We have so much to offer a child, we are stable financial and emotionally. Your child will have everything he or she needs. I have been very active in the school system, cub scouts and our church Willow Creek. We want to find a birthparent that wants an open adoption. We a birthparent that we can have strong ties to and the baby will always know who their birthparent is . Please feel free to contact us for more information. We can send you pictures , talk on the phone or even meet. Adoption is a very hard decision... we hope that we can help make that decision easier by making you and your baby part of our family. Thank you for taking the time to read this! Love, John and Melissa Cummings

 

adoption??? - September 14

have you thought about adoption? i mean if you dont think that you are going to be able to do it then maybe you should reconsider all of your options again. adoption is a good thing and with alot of families you can still see your child and recieve photos and letters regularly. my husband and i have always wanted to adopt a baby and havent yet got the chance to. maybe we could talk? please e-mail me at: [email protected]

 

Aisha - September 14

The girl wanted support not adoption!!!!!!! MY GOD

 

Dior - September 15

I have many of the same problems you do - Dont ever think no-one will ever want you because you have a child. I know alot of men that are in relationships with women that have children from before. I think that once your baby is born things will change and you will realize that everything happens for a reason and that you are better off without the dad. One day he will realize what he has lost out on and he will be kicking himself but it will be too late. Keep your head held high!

 

Thankful - September 15

It is so sad that so many women on here have to have the same basis for their story..."he left after I got pregnant" Thank goodness for technology so we can find comfort in stangers walking in the same shoes huh!? Christine - I am no way trying to say what your feeling isn't real but it is all just a matter of time before you feel better. I was and sometimes still am in the same state of mind. My little girl is SO precious though. Life is now about her and that makes every sleepless night and tear I shed more than worth while! PLEASE, PLEASE focus on that little life and keep yourself safe both mentally and physically. There is no greater reward than that little one!

 

Time - September 15

I had so many people tell me so many things to try and keep me positive and so much of it fell on deaf ears. But when I finally had my baby it was a like I found a whole new reason to live. I now cherish everyday because of her. Im just saying to hold out and try and stay positive. I promise it will be worth it

 

Jill - September 26

You will make it. Just take it a day at a time. As for the ex and his skank, get a lawyer and get him out of your life. Record his hara__sing phone calls that's abussive and he needs to be out of your life. Call social services and ask for help. Try catholic charities too. Go see friends or family. Remember, you are pregnant and a lot of your feelings are being heightened by all those hormones rushing around in your body. Just keep your baby in your thoughts and do what is best for her. If you TRULY do not want her, then go to an agency. It's not to late for adoption if you do not want to be a mom.

 

tonya janzen - October 9

i feel so usless righting this i would like to help you but i live in houston b.c. canada try to think possative i had a son when i was 17 i thought everything was over but now hes older and i can presue a career still. cause im young enough still.if you realy need to talk im at [email protected]

 

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