Please Help I Don T Know What To Do

4 Replies
nikol - March 12

My ex and I are in the process of trying to work things out so I guess you could say were back together but it's still not a secure relationship. Anyways, he's very upset because I decided not to give our baby his last name. I said if we were married then I would. Plus my parents told me not to because they think it will give him a better chance of getting full custody of our baby if he ever tried to one day. He's acting so bitter towards me because of this. What would you do?

 

Karen_Fletcher - March 13

you could always double-barrel, your last name then his, if thats no good, tell to either puy a ring on ur finger or stop whining!!!

 

LL - March 13

Nikol, I can't offer much advice because I'm in a similar situation but I feel your pain on this one. My baby's father is just a__suming that I'm going to give our son his last name, I think because it's a boy. Our relationship is not secure and is on again off again from one week to the next. I gave my first child my last name, a girl, because I wasn't married to her father and wasn't planning on it. I feel I'm in a bind with this one because I understand the point of him wanting his son to carry on his last name, but at the same time we are not married and I don't know that we ever will be. Please let me know how you end up handling this.

 

thailiya - March 13

I slept with this guy 3 times and got pregnant. After I found out I stopped seeing him because it was mostly a " go home from the bar " kinda relationship. Now he says he wants our son to have his last name and he's pretty set on it. But I am unsure because I don't really know this guy. Were not in a relationship although he wants to get to that point. I dont want to offend him by telling him we were just s_x buddies..it would be different if there was love or a strong friendship. But I feel uncomfortable giving my son the last name of a man I hardly know , let alone have any affection for. My mom didn't give me my fathers last name. I dont think it matters so much in a girl because our names change when we get married anyway. As for a son thats different. Does your boyfriend have any brothers who have sons to carry on the last name. If not than I'd give your son his last name.

 

April - March 13

Last names have nothing to do with custody, just so you know. But I do agree with your choice to give the baby your last name. Before I had my daughter, when I was debating on what last name to give her.. my mom said "you and your baby are a package deal... if he wants the baby to have his last name.. he needs to give you his last name too" We both knew that wasn't going to happen... hahahah. Anyway, I decided to give her my last name and am sooooo glad I did. Her father ended up not being around at all. She'll be 8 months old tomorrow, and I haven't even heard from him in almost 3 months. Good ridence. Just thank God she doesn't have to grow up having the last name of someone who didn't even bother to get to know her.

 

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