Ran Out On The Father Because I Realized I Didn T Love Him

5 Replies
becca - November 14

After I found I was pregnant, I sobered up (I had been drinking and smoking pot everyday) and then I realized that I despised my boyfriend at the time and that I had sort of been using him over the course of the three months we had been together. He is older and I had nothing, and he had a little bit and lived right next door. Convienience. IT is terrible, I know. The family I was living with tried to convince me to have an abortion and even "Accompanied me there, " but I knew it wasn't my choice and I ended up leaving hysterical over the thought of ending this baby's life. I have since moved across the country to be with my mom and best friend who are both ultra supportive. I don't want anything to do with Michael. He leaves me voice mail messages asking for money for the car he bought me (I still owe about $400 to him, I have already paid a bunch)He keeps talking about his rights, but I can't imagine sharing custody with him. I am working on getting my life together, but he is almost forty and I doesn't think there is anything wrong with his behaviors. I am so confused. On the one hand, I really do feel this child (I am four months now) is better off without him, but I know that is wrong and not fair to him. How do I go about developing a working relationship with someone I don't trust or love ?

 

Jenn.. - November 14

get some counciling hon, that will help you, stay sober and off drugs. thats good you went to your mom.. If he thinks he is going to get money out of you, tell him your sorry for what happend perhaps you can work out a deal with paternity issues. he is problably just mad, he will get over it. dont know what else to tell you. I kicked out my bf. on my own too. we make our choices.. good move to get close to your family.. everything will sort itself out....dont stress right now about any thing.....relax.. take care of yourself and baby..:)

 

Eva - November 15

You are not alone! The most important thing to do right now is take care of yourself so your baby will also have good health. Think of how happy you'll be when you look into your newborns eyes. I am also pregnant and single and trying to make the best of it. As far as the father, i too have doubts, but as long as he is not practicing those bad behaviors in front of the child, it may be okay. But that might be something you'd like to discuss with your doctor, counselor or a trusted friend.

 

Anne - November 17

He was obviously good enough for you at one point in time. I went through the same thing that you are going through. The father has rights, and if he wants to get nasty about it, he can. Judges want the father involved. Don't you think your child deserves his/her father?????

 

doomed - November 17

I feel sorry for you and the father but even more-so for the baby . the future looks bleak if you don't seek alot of help . A considerable amount of damage has already been done

 

dew - November 17

let me know when you find out! I don't trust my baby's father either. The only advise I can offer is think about your baby every time you have to deal with the father. Don't even consider your feelings because it's not about you anymore. Your maternal instincts won't allow you to hurt your baby in any way. If it doesn't kick in, maybe you shouldn't be a mom. I don't mean to be rude, but your instinct is a part of your heart. I'm sure you have it because you were unable to get an abortion. Obviously, you love your baby, just make all major life decisions in thier best interest. hope this helps.

 

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