Telling My Boyfriend

41 Replies
Whitney - August 12

I live with my boyfriend and a couple weeks ago I got really nauseous and he thought I was pregnant and he kept telling me that there was noway we would have the baby, well it turns out that I just had the flu, but now my periods one week late and I just took a pregnancy test and it turns up I am pregnant. Fact is Im 18, but theres noway im having an abortion or giving my baby up for adoption. What should I do? How should I tell him? And how do I stand firm on my desicion without losing my boyfriend? I grew up without my father i dont want the same for my child

 

SoRrY - July 22

I know how you are feeling...Eventually you are going to have to tell him though. Look, If He is going to leave you because you are pregnant with HIS baby...you dont need him. You dont need to stay in a relationship with someone like that. Dont stay with him just for the baby. Chances are he will just need to warm up to the idea. My guy was surely mad when we found out I was preg. But I am 8 weeks along now and we are fine. He is supporting me in every way he can. Do what you said...Stay firm in your decision to tell him that you are not having an abortion...I had to do it. If he leaves...You are better off with out him.

 

Single Mom - August 12

I know where you are coming from. I was in the same situation. It's hard, but only you know what is right for you and no one else. Hold your ground and stand firm and tell him what you want. If he doesn't like it oh well. But he will be responsible for the baby whether or not he likes the deciision you've made. I know you are worried about loosing him, but sweetie do you know how many guys there are out there that would love to be there for you and your child. I know, I've found one who loves me and my daughter. It is time to think about what is inthe best interest of you and your child.

 

Sam - September 17

If you don't want an abortion, dont get one. If your boy is really worth it he wont ask you to and he will support you. Fact is he should have thought about the possibilities before yall moved in together. If things dont work out with him there are all sorts of places and people to help you.. just look around before you give up.

 

Shorty - September 20

If your boy goes, your boy goes. You are better of standing up for yourself and doing what you want rather than falling into the trap of doing what he wants ( abortion) and then have him possibly leave afterwards anyway. ANd if you guys do not make it, you will be kicking yourself that you didn't stand up for yourself!! NO MATTER IN YOU ARE IN A RELATIONSHIP OR NOT.... YOU MUST ALWAYS STAND UP FOR YOURSELF

 

its ok - October 26

i know what your are going through, im 15 and im pregnant and i have no idea how im going to tell the father..i didnt grow up with my dad and i dont want my baby to grow up like i did..and i bet you are scared..u feel alone just like me..just tell him, its better for your baby and u never no..maybe he cant deal with the fact now, but later on he might and when he does he might be a great dad...so just tell him i guess..im still trying to tell the father of my babys dad..and hopefully i will and i hope u do the same thing

 

Julie - October 29

Well I had the same problem when I got pregnant a month ago... I sat him down a told him and i told him if he didn't want to be in the child's live then he can pay child suport... Well evenully he did stay with me.... But I am 13.....

 

k - October 29

He should have already thought and talked about the possibility of an unexpected pregnancy if you guys were having s_x (especially if it was unprotected). If you are living together that's always something you should discuss because it's very possible,and personally, maybe its just me but I don't think I would stay with or risk having s_x with anyone who would force me into an abortion.He could however, just be freaking out. When I first found out I was pregnant, I was the one who said i'm getting an abortion no matter what, it was my bf that suggested we keep it, and after researching and discussing my possibilities, I kept my baby and it was the best decision I have ever made. It's a scary thing at first, and he may not know how to deal with it. Give him a bit of time and he may come around, but do not let him push you into an abortion if it is not in your beliefs

 

Amanda - November 15

It's understandable you dont want your child to grow up without a father, but if he doesnt respect your descision then to hell with him, it goes to show that there is someone else out there that will love you and your child if not the same than better. I am 19 and when I was 17 I lost a baby and that was the hardest thing I ever went through trust me you dont want to lose a baby wether its a miscarraige or an abortion, its hard. And the way I look at it is when God is ready for you to have a child then you will. Honey wether he leaves you or not or if there is someone else there always you are the only person in the world you can depend on the most. Trust what you are saying and have that baby, you have to let him to the guidelines. Please dont give the baby away. Remember if he leaves you he was never a MAN.

 

Salena - November 17

I know how you feel. I am in the same situation. Well if your boyfriend loves you enough and cares for you enough when you tell him he should be supportive and stay with you and help you raise the child. If you or anybody else has questions e-mail me at [email protected]

 

Minnie - February 4

you should tell him. and tell him is not your falt cause u did not climb on your self!!!!

 

Kelie - February 22

I understand. I had an abortion when I was 13. I was raped, and ended up pregnant. At the time I was living with my mother. She told me the child was evil, and that we couldn't let it live. Because I was a kid I didn't understand that I still had to make the decision myself - so I did what she said. I cried through the entire process, and tried to kill myself when I was 14. I'm 20 now, and if I could go back and change what I did, I would. I regret it everyday. Do what YOU feel is right, and let NO ONE dictate to you what you should do with YOUR body and child. If the father wants nothing to do with either of you, than so be it - there is help out there.

 

kim - March 7

just tell him how u feal he should under stand

 

scared - March 10

I have been involved with this guy on and off for four years and although know hes no good for me i choose to keep involving myself with him. The fact is i'm pregnant now by him and at first he was freaking out about it and told me i was to have an abortion and that was that or he would kill me or punch me in my stomach to destroy the fetus. That was something i never heard anyone say before so i stayed away for a while, then he chose to calm down and reason with me because my mind was set on keeping my baby. We tried for a freindship but he's set on me not talking to anybody yet he's able to sleep around if I do he threatens to harm me. Through this all his family is supporting my decision but they dont know the half of what I go through with him should I tell them? And every now and then he makes references to not having the baby and how I trapped him but Im five months pregnant and I cant understand why hes still wanting me not to go through with this... should I allow him to be around this precious little girl of mine because if I deny him of that it will be a world war im so confused hes a good guy when he wants to be and I love him but all this crazy talk scares me ...help!!!!

 

brandi - March 13

well u should tell him that u weren't pregnant at first. then u got pregnant the next time u guys had s_x. tell him that u really love him and u want to make things better for u two. tell him u want your child to have a father with her to grow up with. tell him that if he doesn't want the child because of his family not wanting him to or something like that, he should go with what he thinks not his family, if he loves u like he says then he will ask u to keep it. then he really loves u. go with what your heart says. tell him that u want to be with him forever and u love him so much!

 

j - March 15

Just tell him he has a right to know - if he loves you and owns up to his responsiblities he will stay with you, if not you are better off without him! I had an abortion 4 years ago and i have regreted it everyday since!

 

hether - March 17

just tell him and say that if he doesn´t want this baby he isn´t going to be never a good father! the truth is always the best!

 

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