13 And Pregnant Dont Know Where To Start

15 Replies
Melissa - May 14

Hey, Im Melissa and i was wondering if you might be able to give me advice, i have found out that i am pregnant by my boyfriend i know this because i have not had s_x with anyone else, i felt peer pressure and wanted to keep him so i did it more dan once with no protection. Nobody knows and i know he would want me to give it away because our relasionship is a secret we didint want anyone to know about it, but i want to keep it, where do i go now who do i tell first i am so confused i even thought about ending my life so i wouldnt have to face this but im going to give it a go thank-you x~X~x~X Melissa X~x~X~x

 

Honey - May 14

i cnt help u der maybe u shud think of givin it away and/or end it wif dis guy

 

tex u.k. - May 14

You poor girl this must be so confusing for you, peer pressure can be an awful thing and 13 is not an easy age. I hope you learn after this that you must put your own health and happiness before peer pressure. Sometimes a situation can seem so impossible that ending it all feels like the only option, but i guarentee that you will be able to get through this, whatever decision you make. Now that you are aware of your pregnancy, a few vital first steps must be taken. Is there someone older than you and responsible who you feel close to and who you can trust (e.g. a parent, relative, family friend, doctor)? If so, i suggest that you pluck up the courage and break the news to them, asking for non judgemental advice and support. I know this is a hard thing to do, but at 13 you really need someone older and mature to help you through the scary early days. Your health and the baby's is vital, certain vitamins are needed, you must look after your body with good food and plenty of sleep, and SEE A DOCTOR as soon as possible. A good doctor will be able to provide you with advice, medical care and info on all of your options, contact details of nearby support groups etc. When it comes to deciding what to do about your pregnancy, be it keeping the baby, adoption or abortion, you must feel that you are not under pressure, and have been provided with all of the facts to make a fully informed, mature decision. Every situation is different and you must do what is best for you. Your head must be spinning right now, but the sooner you take some positive action, the sooner you will feel more in control of the situation. It may not feel like it, but the opinion of your boyfriendshould be somewhere very low on your list of priorities. You are being faced with a very adult situation at a very young age and need adult help and support, not pressure from a boy who will probably have even less of an idea of what to do than you do. Please stay strong and ask for support as soon as possible. Best of luck keep us updated on how you progress x

 

Mandy - May 14

Hey, I think you can do it. Any woman can do it no matter her age, the younger the age the tougher it is. I think you should begin with telling your mom. She may get angry but it is better you tell her or else your baby could be threatened if not taken care of properly.Fetal development is one of the most serious stages of development. Tell you boyfriend and tell him of your decision. If he doesn't want you to keep it tell him that he has to take responsibility for his actions, it isn't only his choice you have a choice ince it is a baby in your body. Don't end your life.. you made a choice and you have to live up to the consequences.. When you have your babyyou will love it and I don't think you wold have the heart to get rid of it.. and if you do make sure you find a loving home where he/she will be loved and taken care of properly.

 

Melissa - May 14

I dont know what to say! you have been so very helpful to me and you just dont know how greatful i am i will try and tel someone as soon as possible so i can get proper help

 

tex u.k - May 14

That's great to hear Melissa, this is probably the hardest thing you've faced so far in your life, but just the fact that you came looking for help is a very positive step. The best of luck to you, let us know how it's going and remember that there are always people here to listen if you need to vent your feelings x

 

Mandy - May 14

Well, you're welcome, these are the reason's people create these forums. Soemtimes one needs to talk with others. Good luck :)

 

Daisy Jean - May 15

Melissa, I am so concerned for you. You sound like a sensible girl, but I'm with the others- you should tell someone you trust. There will probably be some yelling and crying, but then you will be relieved to have help. Why was your relationship a secret? I don't think that sounds too good. The people who love you, will still love you. Best of luck.

 

Melissa - May 15

our relasionship was a secret because we didnt want people in school making a fuss and putting pressure on us, only i did not realise that he would be the one putting the pressure on me :( i have been niave, but now im prepared to face up to it and deal with what i have done

 

katy - May 15

calm down how old is your lad??? tell him you ar epregnant and want to keep it then tell your mum and dad sit down and tell them dont wait for them to find out it will only end up worse.. good luck and hope everything works out if your lad leaves you then he isnot worth it think abut you and what ias best for you, remember that this will change your life forever

 

maya - May 15

if u wanna talk u can email me. but for now congrats.

 

Melissa - May 16

Just to let you all know that i am so gratful to everyone who replied but the bigger new is that i managed to tell my parents they have send me to my grandma's while they 'digest' the news so i dont know what will happen when i get back got to go now my dad is waiting outside and mum is calling me downstairs to go to grandma's see you soon x~X~x Melissa ~x~X~x

 

tex u.k. - May 16

That's brilliant, how brave of you! I think that the fact they want to take some time to digest the news and haven't gone mental (at least i hope not!) is a very good sign. Just be prepared to stay as calm as possible, answer any questions that your parents might have about what happened as honestly and openly as you feel possible, and take this time out at your grandma's as an opportunity to gather your thoughts on the matter, think of any questions that you will want to ask your parents, and try to relax yourself as much as possible. I know that this must be a tense time for you, but remember that your health and your baby's is vital and stress cannot be good. Let your parents know that you want to make your own decision based on ALL of the facts, but that you need their loving support to do this. I hope that the next few days are successful for you, and once again WELL DONE for being sensible and brave enough to tell your parents. If you ever want to email,my address is [email protected] Best of luck! x

 

caramel - May 16

well I believ you should follow your heart but you have to understand with a baby there comes alot of sacrafice and remeber your still young you have your whole life aheadof you there is no problem big or small that GOD would'nt place upon you if he you could'nt handle it,just believe in your self you can do it dont let him judge the fate of your child,you should first tell someone you can trust who is able to a__sist you with seeing a doctor to make sure your okay...

 

Melissa - May 22

Hi everyone, ive been gone a while now but i got home from my grandma's yesterday evening. My parents sat me down and explained to me what they think i should do i have agreed to keep and love the baby thank-you to everyone who replied and i promise i will keep you posted x~X~x~X Melissa X~x~X~x

 

Carri - May 23

Way to go Melissa - I think I can safely say, we are all routing for you. Best of luck to you and your baby!

 

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