Breaking The News

7 Replies
AlieNicole - February 11

Hi everyone:) I have been reading these forums for a few weeks now, and decided id register and post. Im 16, soon to be 17 in March. I have been dating my guy for around a year and 4months? He is quite a bit older than me, 25. I was s_xually abused from when I was 8 until about 13, by a close family friend. I was to scared to say anything and in the beginning. I really didn't understand. I wish I would have said something sooner, but I didn't. I ended up having to home school, because the guy attend my school and when I said something, everyone in my town knew shortly after. With all this happening my mom and I formed a great relationship and have always been open about everything in my life. I have a VERY irregular period, which I had checked out and was given medication for this few months back. I haven't received a cycle in about two months. I think I maybe pregnant. If I am , I know I still will take care of my baby , and I know it will not be easy. I have great confidence in myself, although I know I am young and will have to work ten times harder. Here is the hard part, breaking this to my mother. I know she is going to be highly disappointed in me. She had became pregnant at 13 with my brother, and doesn't want to see me make the same "mistake" she did. I know she will love me regardless and be there for me, but how can I break the news? I know this is alot to read but thanks for taking the time too.

 

Blackeye - February 11

Are you sure that you are pregnant? It might be that the medication does like you loose your period. That happens to every person who gets the kind of meds that you get when you have irregular periods. You should take a pregnancy test as sonn as possible. And if it is negative than thats okay but if it is positive than go to the doctor. Have you and your 25 year old boyfriend had s_x? Im so sorry that you got s_xually abused i know how hard it is. But you should tell your boyfriend this. And you might want to check if you will be able to go pregnant for 9 months because you might have problems after beeing s_xually abused. Tell your mum and she will help. She knows you better than anyone. You are her daughter.

 

Grandpa Viv - February 11

You are not telling of any pregnancy signs other than a missing period, which in your case is not unusual. a__suming your mom knows you are dating a man 10 years older, she should be very ready for a convo about effective birth control. At your age you should be having your first gyno exam. Why don't you start there and see how it develops. Good luck!

 

DUESEPTEMBER28TH - February 11

GO TO THE DOCTOR WITHOUT MOM AND IF YOUR DOCTOR SAYS THAT YOU ARE PREGNANT, DON'T HIDE IT FROM YOUR MOM. I AIN'T GOING TO BE EASY TO TELL HER, I WAS 21 WITH MY FIRST CHILD AND IT WASN'T EASY, I JUST CALL HER UP AND THE FIRST WORDS OUT OF MY MOUTH IS THAT I'M PREGNANT. I AM 7.5 WEEKS WITH MY SECOND AND STILL HAVEN'T TOLD MY MOM UNTIL THE ULTRASOUND WHICH IS THE 16TH AND THEN TOO IT WILL BE MOM I AM PREGNANT.

 

AlieNicole - February 12

Thanks for the replies, and yes we have had s_x, on many occupations. as for the meds, I took them a few months ago .. so I do not think the symptoms would come from that? Although im unsure. I have also been having sore b___sts etc. I am going to take a test sometime this week. If I am , its going to be really hard to tell my mom, although I know she will love me and be there regardless, I just know she will be disappointed. Also, what kind of problems may I have getting pregnant . after being s_xually abused? I know my doctor mentioned it before, but never really explained. Thanks again for all the help guys!

 

nate11 - February 12

Well if you really are pregnant and youve been to the doctors and found out, then the best way i think to tell you mom is to set her down and tell her. My fiance found out she was pregnant on he 17th birthday and we finally got the courage up for BOTH of us to go together and tell her mom. Now her mom wasnt yelling and throwing stuff at us or she wasnt cussing at us, but she was disappointed and nevous, so nervous that she bit a hole in her lip. But now shes all happy and she talks to my fiances stomach all the time and calls it her baby lol....so if you are pregnant i wish the best of luck to you and if your mom cares anything about you then she will understand that mistakes happen and that she will have a little baby again that she wont have to carry herself lol so good luck

 

Blackeye - February 12

If you were s_xually abused than you might have what i have. I have a rip between my uterus and placenta what my doctor told me that came from being raped. You can have problems being pregnant at all and several people that get s_xually abused get long time depression after birth.

 

AlieNicole - February 12

Thanks everyone for the help:) Much appreciated.

 

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