I Am 25 And Got A 16yr Old Pregnant

60 Replies
Confused - September 11

I am from nebraska and I don't know what I can do. First off let me say that she lied about her age initially..not that I am trying to justify myself. My first reaction was shock. I am a responsible person but it did happen and I don't believe in abortion and I want to keep the baby. I was just really embarassed but now I am just concerned. She told her parents and they are very unsupportive and angry. What can I do to be in this babies life? I want to raise thsi child also because it could be the only one I ever have. I feel very strongly about a person taking care of their child under any circ_mstances. How can I be with my baby when its born in 6 more months? I would do anything because it is that important to me. The girl wants to be with me also. Any advice please?

 

Confused - June 15

Please give me some good advice guys. Honestly this is the hardest thing I have ever had to go through. I would go so far as to marry this girl if it meant being with my unborn child and making right of all this. he is a great girl and she ddi come honest with me. The embara__sment on my part kinda turned into nothing once I have seen the big picture.

 

leigh - June 15

It is so nice to see a guy stand up to his responsibilities I would contact a councler or lawyer in your state and just give them the info and ask for their advice. Good luck

 

Confused - June 15

Thanks for the advice. I guess I am just kinda paraniod also. Does anyone know about any nebraska laws that could help me out? or maybe a parent on here that can help me say the right words to her parents so they loosen up a bit?

 

Confused - June 16

any more advice?

 

Shelly - June 16

Being open and honest are the most important. Start by making sure that you talk to them at a good time. Ask, “Is there some time that you could talk to us about it?” Let them know you’re feeling nervous, don’t know how to start, and are worried about what they think. “ We really need your help figuring some stuff out.” A few things to keep in mind: Your reaction to their reactions is very important. Remember, these people care deeply for their daughter. The situation is hurting them. Their first reaction is anger. No matter how they react, be understanding. Say something like, “You’re right.” or “I agree” or “I understand.” Keep it short, and don’t make excuses. Be sure to listen, and not interrupt or argue. It is important to not make them more upset. Ask for advice when they have gotten used to the idea that you want to include them. Let them feel special that you chose them out of all the people you know to share this with. Remember a well placed “I love you.” can be invaluable. Use this phrase whenever it feels right. Hope this helps some. You should try talking to a qualified counselor. Good luck.

 

Confused - June 16

As of right now I don't think they would even talk to me. She says her mom is still furious and dad is more forgiving but still unhappy.

 

kay - June 16

my heart is with you. i dont think that there is anything you can do unless the girl nor her parents want to keep the baby. in that case, you get him/her. if they do want to keep the baby and keep you from seeing her, because whether she wanted to have s_x or not, you committed statuatory rape. not in my words though. unless you get a really nice judge that understands your point of view like we do, you dont have a chance. sorry.

 

Confused - June 16

In my state she would have to be 15 for it to be stuatory rape. I am just really concerned about the pregnant situation, not for myself but for the baby. I am basically here just to recieve some nonjudgmental advice on how to gain some peace with her parents. Thanks

 

Shelly - June 17

How long have her parents known about the situation? Could they just need a longer cooling off period? Has she already decided to keep the baby?

 

Emily - June 17

I really respect that you care so much about the baby. Her parents will learn to accept it...right now, they are just hurt that their 16 year old daughter got pregnant. Once the drama dies down, you will have your chance to voice your concerns. If she decides to keep the baby...the baby will need a father. Her parents will realize that you are man enough to want to be there for their daughter and the unborn baby. Good Luck!

 

Confused - June 18

Thanks, you guys have been a great help. Her parents have know for about a month. Yes she wants to keep the baby. Her mom told me tonight not to count on being with her daughter but I can be there for the baby. I dunno where to go from here. I know I am not going to give up.

 

Xx$xX - June 25

well i take it your a guy maybe well if you want to be in the 16 year olds life and her baby well i say she she live with you and you 2 should take care of the baby ok so just talk

 

Confused - July 4

If I married the girl out of state and came back here would it be valid still? Also could I get in trouble? Her parents are really traeting her badly now and I want her to be happy. I know I would be happy with her and our child.

 

kay - July 4

sure it's a big age difference, but look at cameron diez and justin timberlake. and how can we forget 50 cent, and vivica fox. it's not a huge age difference when you look at these people. think about when he's 99, and 90. but for the most part, lilly is right. her parents cant rule you. they'll keep telling you what to do until you stand up to them.

 

fatima - July 6

dear confused person, i think ure no more confused cause she is already pregnant .... i mean u guys shold have thought before having s_x. now lemme tell u one thing im an indian staying in dubai and i got married when i was 17 and my husband was 29 now isnt that a big age difference...but inspite of that i love him a lot cause he cares for me nothing can come between us. and i think that u should also marry that girl and start a new life with ur family. u r lucky u may have a baby with her get married before the child is born. ill pray to allah for u both to have happy life.

 

Mandy - July 6

I understand exzactly where you are comming from...I am 17 and have just recently found that i am pregnant, and my boyfriend is older and my parents are totally against it and want me to have an abortion. but i will not do that because i love the guy i am with and know we could make things work. If you both love each other enouph nothing should come in between this. Age is a number....

 

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