I Need Assurance

11 Replies
Jen - November 29

I know this is going to sound stupid and childish but i've been thinking this through since I was very very young. I am 15 years old and I am ready to have a kid. No, i am not married, but very much in-love. My partner also agrees that we should have a baby. He is 17, with a high-school education and no job. I know your probably thinking how will you support your baby? well, honestly, my dad, atleast until i get on my own 2 feet. My dad should have no problem with it, my sister has 5 kids and my brother has 2 and my dad supports them. Im not going to be just another teen-mom with no high school diploma or on welfare. I have big plans for my future, and im not a quitter. I want to prove that it is possible for a teenage girl to get pregnant and still be successful in life. If i could have 1 thing in life it would be a child, i love babies and i would love to have one of my own. i know the better thing to do is to wait, but we're not promised a tomorrow. And i want to have *my baby* before its to late. I know just how to raise a baby, and grow with it. I know it will be alot harder for me at this age then at an older age, but i want to get it done. Please tell me what you think of this, if you think I am doing the right thing for trying for a baby, or if you think im wrong (please dont be harse though) & please keep in mind that i do know how hard raising a baby is, but i can do it, and i want to.

 

redeem - November 30

if you're absolutely sure that you've thought of everything, there's nothing we can really do to stop you. Being pregnant at your age carries many risks, but if you think you can handle them.... At the very least, I think you should get your boyfriend to propose before you go that far.

 

amber - November 30

I wasn't going to reply to this, but the more my husband and I thought about this, the more I felt I should. I can totally understand where you are coming from with the fact that we are not promised a tomorrow, as I say that day in and day out. I do think you are young to be trying for a baby, my main concern is the fact that you are looking at your dad to support you, and the child. My husbands main concern is the fact that physically you are still growing, and may not be able to handle pregnancy at this point in time. As redeem said, there are many risks for a young girl as yourself. If you plan on going through with trying to have a child, my best advice is talk to your dad and make sure he will help you support the baby, and talk to your dr and make sure you can physically handle pregnancy. You know you want a baby, but do you know the risks you are going to be facing? ask your Dr about all the risk factors before going through with this. Also, I would try to get your BF to at least get a job to help support you and that baby. We are speaking of an innocent life here, not a toy... I personally think that you should wait, even just a couple more short years....but whatever you decide I wish you the best.

 

Jen - November 30

Thank yall for helping me out. Being pregnant has many risks that I know. I have had a miscarriage before and it wasnt easy, my Dr. told me it wasnt because i wasnt ready it was because I didnt diet and excercise right. I did not know that i was preganant until a week before my miscarriage, i was 3 months pregnant. I know i should talk to my Dr. and see if i am physically ready to have a baby now. My sister got pregnant at 16, and if i do get pregnant soon i will be 16 when i deliver the child also. And she is doing really well despite the fact that she has 5 kids at the age of 25. My dad helping me support the baby will not be the only support i will get, my boyfriends family also. and as soon as i turn 16 i will be be working and yes still spending time with my baby and takin care of it. And no hunny my parents didnt abuse me, they never laid a hand on me. Im drug free and always have been therefore i dont need money for drugs, my family is rather wealthy so why would i have a baby just to get money, when all i would have to do is get it straight from them? and my boyfriend wouldnt leave me especially for "sum hotter chick" he loves me for who i am not what i look like. We have been through alot of stuff together and if was going to leave me, he would've already. So no sweetheart its not for money or drugs or because my parents abused.

 

redeem - November 30

how old were u with your first pregnancy?

 

Jen - December 1

i had just turned 14 when i got pregnant.

 

Anonymous - December 28

you cannot be serious! Ever heard of the saying..."kids who have kids"? That is why the welfare rate is so high. Your time will come to have kids, why are you forcing an issue like this at such a young age? You sould be more worried about things like school, and after-school activities, getting your driver's license and finding a job. There are more important things in your life right now, than making babies and having your family support them.

 

Stace - January 3

It might be a better idea to wait a few years. Get out on your own with a HS education at least and a job. It's gonna be really hard, but if you think you can do it, go for it. Good luck!

 

Mareia - January 5

i think that your a bit to young to have a kid..and i think that you should wait a couple of years, because your still i school and have and education to get first before any baby come along.If you do have a baby just remeber that you don't have any financially support only your family members and friends and some of these friend probally won't want anything to do with you because you can't go out because you have this little baby to look after all the time. Well i hope you tke the time to seriously think about what yu are doing.

 

Kimberly - January 5

Sorry this response might be slightly late or something but I just saw it and thought I should reply. I felt the same way as you when I was 15 and it didn't happen...but then when I turned 16 it did and i'm thrilled but then reality starts to hit and the worries come in, my boyfriend cheated on me so we broke up and my life just went down the drain, I couldn't make it to school because of morning sickness so I do home schooling and i'm all alone. It may be different for you and no one can tell you not to do it because it's your life but I think you should atleast try to hold off as long as you can till you have a job and money and you have your life together completly. Always think of the what if's and how being a teenage mom will affect your childs life, not just yours. Good Luck

 

Sarah - January 5

Jen, PLEASE do not do this! Being a mother and a parent is taking all responsibility in raising your child. Your dad has had his time of raising HIS kids, and for you to put him in a position for him to be responsible for yours is very very selfish ( i am sorry, but its true) You have no idea how to raise a child, you cant even vote or legally drink. Being a parent is a trial and error thing, you actually learn as you go. So how the heck you can a__sume to know how to raise a child and grow with it is beyond me. I do not mean to be harsh, but your nieveness seems to be getting you into a mess as you are talking about knowing nothing at all. No we are not promised a tomorrow, so does that mean that my 8 year old daughter should go out have s_x, smoke pot, commit a crime, get pregnant, get married, get a job, drop out of school, all in one day??? I am soory but your argument has too many holes in it. Do the sensible thing. Wait until you are an adult and can support yourself first, before you try and play GOD with a child

 

Sarah - January 5

PLUS stop contradicting yourself.."I know your probably thinking how will you support your baby? well, honestly, my dad, atleast until i get on my own 2 feet. My dad should have no problem with it" and then "I want to prove that it is possible for a teenage girl to get pregnant and still be successful in life. If i could have 1 thing in life it would be a child, i love babies and i would love to have one of my own.....please keep in mind that i do know how hard raising a baby is, but i can do it, and i want to." So how does palming off your child to your dad fit in with you knowing how hard it is to support and raise a child BY YOURSELF!?!?!?!? EDUCATION PLEASE !!!!!!!!

 

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