Im So Ashamed Of My Self But Do I Have Any Rights

35 Replies
cik - November 21

im 17 + about 7 months ago i got really drunk + forced my self on my girl friend at the time shes 14. course,, i havnt seen her since + i dont think she ever reported me. but the other day i saw her in the street (she didnt c me i dont think) + she was definitely pregnant. her stomack was massive. i wana bring up this baby + i know i did a bad thing + im totaly ashamed but the babys still mine + i want a part in its life. what can i do?

 

Lace - November 21

That is really terrible, are you sure you're even the father?? There is a possibility you're not after all....And as far as having any rights I really don't know...

 

Kat - November 21

If this wasn't such a serious issue I'd laugh at you. And you would be laughed out of court. Face it - you raped her - why the hell would she ever want anything to do with you never mind the baby. You don't deserve to have a part in this childs life. Drunk or not, you are a rapist.

 

neet - November 22

you probably do have rights, thats how unjust this world is

 

fanny - November 22

how could you rape her? if she said no or tried to push you off in any manner this is what it is considered. she probably doesn't want you to be part of her child's life or she would have told you

 

ambe - November 22

you need serious help. Any idea how much she will and has been sufferng???? I am a victim of rape, twice in my life. You have RUINED someones life. Why would she give you a chance to Ruin that innocent childs life??? If i were her, you would be in JAIL.

 

T - November 22

I really dont know what to say to your post Cik. Apart from giving you a serious ear-bashing about how wrong what you did was and how disgusting. I suppose you have no idea how much you have seriously messed up this girls life. I think the only honorable thing you can do is own up to raping her. Being under the influcence is no excuse. You still raped her and you've still messed her life up. To be honest you have no idea whether this child is yours or not. You do have rights as the father but its up to the mother mainly. And I dont see her letting you see your child anytime soon. Especially after what you did to her. You really should own up to what you've done. I dont know if talking to her will be any help. I wouldn't advise it. She'll probably scream blue murder when she see's you. I know I would. This is a very difficult situation. You dont know for sure if the baby she's carrying is yours and because of this you dont have any rights. If you are legally confirmed the father, then you have rights. But because you raped her, you will have no rights as you will be cla__sed as dangerous towards the girl.

 

E - November 22

It is possible that she would like to hear from you, for some odd reason. An apology is in order and although you cannot undo the wrong that you did, you can still try to do something right. I would write her a letter and express your sincerity to her and let her know, if it is your child, that you are willing to father the baby if she is open to that. I would make it known that you are aware that you do not have rights and if you want to avoid jail, I would not incriminate yourself in the letter. I do not think you are ent_tled to be a part of this baby's life after what you did but you never know how she feels about you fathering your child, if it is yours. You should consider giving up alcohol given that you cannot control yourself when drunk. Rape is ILLEGAL and you can go to prison for it.

 

McM - November 23

RAPIST

 

Wylie - November 23

Just go and knock on her door. You'll soon know if she wants to see you or not.

 

lala - November 23

Unfortunately you do. Although I think you would be a b___d for trying to enact your parental rights. RAPIST.

 

razmine - November 24

i think u should keep tryin to help even she doen,t want u to

 

cik - November 24

i called her + she slammed the phone down. so i went round + when she saw me she started screamin + her brother hit me he would have proper beaten me up if he could have run faster than me. i know i shouldnt be suprised but i want my kid with me + dont think shes stable enuff to bring the kid up. shes mental. i just dont get it though. was it really so bad??? i only had s_x with her and she didnt struggle that much i thought she might have gotten into it. i know i shouldnt ave done it but was it really that bad that i cant even see my kid?

 

lala - November 24

YES IT REALLY WAS THAT BAD. I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU CAN'T COMPREHEND HOW BAD IT WAS. YOU SHOULD HAVE NO RIGHTS TO YOUR CHILD AND THE LAWS ARE CHANGING SO YOU DONT! YOU ARE IN VERY SERIOUS TROUBLE.

 

Audrey - November 24

Cik, given the situation you should leave your girlfriend alone because it's obvious she doesn't want you in her life or her baby's. You are lucky that she didn't report you because in most U.S. states the age of s_xual consent is 16 therefore you committed a crime. If you are determined to exercise your parental rights then you will probably have to get a lawyer.

 

amber - November 24

you dont think SHE is stable enough? Well it is very CERTAIN you are NOT stable enough. You have taken something from her, you have hurt her beyond words, you need HELP. If i were her, again, you would be in jail where sc_m like you belong. No kid deserves a father like you, i know. My father is a rapist, and I lost my innocence at the age of 4 because of it. Get help, before you ruin someone else's life.

 

T - November 24

Cik - Did i just see right, you asked was it really that bad? Yes it was that bad. Its one of the worst crimes made against a woman and scarrs her emotionally and physically for life. I'll give you some info. Can you imagine what its like being too scared to leave your own home, ever sound you hear when your alone scaring the daylights out of you? Can you comprehend what it feels like to walk down the street then suddenly see a gang and among the gand their are lads - these lads scare you big time. They dont say or do anything, They just hang with their mates. But they terrify you. They terrify you so much that you shake, sweat, have a panic attack and your heart beats so fast you feel like its going to explode through your chest. Can you comprehend that? And this is only the begining. Your ex girlfriend may also be terrified to see her friends, especially when they mention boyfriends or guys they fancy. The thought of s_x will make her shiver and shake and feel sick. She'll be scared to do the usual things she normally does. And as for physically, with feeling the above way, whenever she has s_x it will hurt her. Because self-consciously she is terrified it will happen again. She may also become depressed and try to kill herself. Or some rape victims think its normal and they deserved it, so they go around from one guys bed to another, being abused, physically, emotionally and s_xually and expect it. When they have children, their children expect it and think its normal.Could you imagine what kind of life this is for the girl? And if the above fails, she'll just slit her wrists one day. Could be many years down the line or just a few days or weeks. But it happens. Now do you understand why its that bad? BTW you say your 17+ - how plus exactly are we talking - early 20s? If this is true you'll be done not only for rape, but can be done twice over for it. Because you had s_xual intercourse with a minor. Guys like you disgust me. How can you ask if it that bad?! Of course its that bad! It's horrendous!

 

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