Messy Situation

5 Replies
Molly Girl - September 21

I am 18 years old, and 20 weeks pregnant. When i found out i was pregnant, my boyfriend of 2 years told me that he would be supportive and all the rest of it. When i was 12 weeks pregnant, his att_tude changed, and he started to become really distant from me. I found out last week, that one of my best friends has been sleeping with him for 4 months, now they are dating, and he has proposed to her. I am so depressed, I feel very betrayed by two people who i once loved very much. I am trying to gather my thoughts around this mess, and cope wth the fact that i am going to be a single mother at 18 years old. Anyone have any advice on how i should help myself to deal with this

 

jaedyn - September 21

i am sorry to hear about your situation. he sounds like a true a$$. but the situation at hand now is that your going to be a single mother at the age of 18. well i have good news for you. you are not the only 18 year old in the world that is a single mother. i to was once 18 with a child. he is the greatest thing that has happened to me. and like you my "boyfriend" left me when i was pregnant. but she wasn't my friend. they ended up having a baby together and getting married. i wasn't single for long tho. i find my husband when my son was 2 months old. my advice to you is to not worry. u will be able to go to school and work (im a__suming you do have at least family support). life will be a little bit harder but remeber that your son/daughter is there at the end of the day waiting for your love. a child is the best thing that can happen to anyone (i believe). u will make it! god bless u and good luck!

 

Amy - September 21

What a pair of sc_mbags they are. I have been there. I was 16 at the time. I know its easy to say this now but believe me you are better off without them. Really, you have not lost a friend because a friend would never do that to you. As for him, he is a jumped up little coward that cannot face his responsibilities and is not worthy of you and your baby. Neither of you need that wimp in your lives. He will be the one mssing out on all those precious moments that you are going to have with your baby.

 

Amy - September 21

Cont... Have you got family and other friends around you? If so, don't be afraid to ask for support or even just a little attention and affection. When I was feeling down and worried about being a single mum and thinking about 'him' and why he did it, the thing I found helped the most was thinking into the future and planning. Just simple things like, what my babys first outfit was going to be, where we would go on our first outing, the first time I would b___stfeed her, her first tooth, friend, day at pre-school, first day at proper school, first sc___ped knee and how I would comfort her etc... and instead of feeling dread I began to get excited and look forward to it. Thats when I realised, I didn't need to think about 'him' or need 'him'. I could do this on my own. I feel I have done it better on my own.

 

Amy - September 21

Cont... What I think would help you is to join a prenatal cla__s where you will meet loads of expectant mums and maybe even some in the same situation as you. It's a great source of support. I actually met an older mum of 3 there and she sort of became my mentor. We have stayed firm friends and now our 4 year olds are best friends! Also when you have had your baby you could join a mother and baby group, these are really helpful, gets you out of the house and socialising and allows your child to interact with other kids and prepares them at an early age for pre-school and school. I know these are very baby orientated and you need time to be 'you', not babys mum. Thats where friend and family support comes in. Try and get a babysitter and have a girly night out, or if you can't get a babysitter have a girly night in doing stupid childish stuff while babys in bed. I do hope you can consider my suggestions and have support. Take care of yourself of you and your baby. You have been betrayed by two people close to you and you are bound to feel really c___p but believe me it won't last forever. Being a mum is hard but also one of the most rewarding things in the world. Good luck x

 

Amy - September 21

I'm sorry that was so long! It would let me send it all at once so I had to send it in three parts! I hope it helped though.

 

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