Need Help BAD

3 Replies
scared and alone - October 18

I'm 14 yrs. old... and I'm 2 months and one week pregnant. I had a boyfriend for eight months and it got pretty serious... we were having s_x with condoms for about 5-6 months I was stupid and believed he really loved me and wanted to be with me forever... he said he wanted to have a kid with me... and so we stopped using condoms...and i know that was stupid... i was hesitant after a while but was to afraid to say anything... and now that my boyfriend and me are no longer dating...he said he would help me...but hasnt yet... and i cant tell my mom or have it because she will kick me out of the house... i dont think i can put it up for addoption either because i wouldnt be able to see it for a minute after having it inside me for 9 months and never be able to see it again... that would hurt way to much... i dont like the idea of abortion... but im afraid thats what it comes to...but i dont know how to go about it... plz help!

 

Daile - October 18

Scared, you're wrong. There is a thing called an open adoption. Depending on the terms you and the adoptive parents agree on, this can range anywhere from you visiting the baby while it's growing up, to you receiving pictures and letters every year. Also, you need to tell your mom. I know you think she'll kick you out, but I doubt she really will. She'll be upset for a while, but explain to her what's going on. In the end, she'll be there for you, because she loves you. Your exboyfriend will have to help with the baby, whether he wants to or not, if you decide to keep it. All you have to do is get a paternity test done (and if he doesn't want to, a court will order it). Once it's proven that he's the father, he will be ordered to pay a certain amount of child support every month. Although he cannot legally be made to pay until he is 18, they will keep track of all the payments until that time. When he turns 18, he will have no choice but to start paying, because if he doesn't, he can be sent to prison. If you do decide to adopt out, you may want to consider having a relative adopt the baby. That way you would still be able to see it regularly, and eventually tell it the truth. If you decide that abortion is the way to go, then contact a planned parenthood center near you. This would be a last resort in my opinion.

 

Jade - October 18

I agree with Daile.You need to talk to your mom about this, and even though she might be upset or disappointed, you're her daughter and she loves you. You have so much to think about, and none of us can make the decision for you. You have to think about what's best for you and your baby. No matter what you decide to do, you should probably go see a doctor (if you haven't already) ASAP. Good luck!

 

... - October 19

Dont have an abortion whatever you do..this child was planned and at some point was obviously wanted despite your age/s. Your mum will need to know whatever happens so its best you tell her now.Why dont you talk to your X and ask him what hes planning on doing to help you look after the baby..just talk to your mum she will be able to help!!

 

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