Need Reassurance I Guess

5 Replies
heatherlove - March 29

Hey...i'm 16 and im 5 months pregnant. My boyfriend wanted me to get an abortion so we made the appointment and everything, and we just broke up about 3 days ago (for a very stupid reason might i add). We were together for a year and a half. We broke up once before, last year but we got back together. This time, he's sayin its for good and stuff, so I don't know what going to happen. Now i'm not sure if I want to go through with this. I don't really like abortion and in the beginning I was just doing it to spite him, which was wrong, I know. So now i'm thinking of doing an open adoption. I don't know if i'm just thinking this because i'm upset over the break up or if it's actually the right decision. I know that I won'y be able to handle a baby on my own, with me going back to high school and not having him around. So i figured it would be the best thing, that way I would still be able to watch her grow and stuff. I told him I was thining of not getting the abortion done but I wasn't sure yet. So he told me to call him and let him know when I decide. The thing is, I don't want him thinking i'm not doing it, just because i'm trying to get him back. Because that isn't it at all. And I don't want him to want to get back together cause yes, I do want him back and I hate being away from him, but I don't want him back for that reason. So I guess what i'm here for is advice or reassurance or anything so I know if i'm doing the right thing. I know many of you are going through the stress and decisions too so I know it's part of just what is best for me but I can't seem to figure it out. So thanks, for reading and I could really use the help.

 

MystinaAlise - March 29

i dont know of many places where you can still get an abortion done at 5 months... you waited kinda long for that option... i think if you cant take care of the baby then open adoption is a wonderful idea... i also think that raising the baby yourself would be good if you thought you could do it... it is hard but there are a lot of resources out there to help you... im personally against abortion because there are too many people out there who cant have children... but if you do decide on open adoption please be sure you trust the people because i have heard of cases where they say its open and then there is nothing stopping the new "parents" from not keeping up there end of the deal

 

Grandpa Viv - March 29

Heather, you are several months too late to be thinking of abortion. I commend you for sitting back and confronting the situation realistically. There are tens of thousands of childless women out there desperate for the e-mail address of someone like you. Some of them would even be willing to do open adoption, though most fear that you would come back at a later time and ask for the child to be returned. Would you want open adoption with someone nearby, or on the other side of the country? If you want to go through with this, my suggestion is to psych yourself into believing the baby you are carrying belongs to someone else. Start looking at http://www.birthmother.org or Google Open adoption. Maybe I can help you at http://www.ppowb.org/gv/ .Good luck!

 

teegz_iz_spunky - March 29

Hey Heather, You sound as though you are taking a really mature approach to all of this. Pregnancy and babies are not an easy task!! I haven't been in the same position as you but I do have a 7 month old daughter. If you want to just chat or something my email is [email protected] and I have msn too. Talk soon!!

 

heatherlove - March 29

thanks for your help, i think i'm gonna do the adoption. i told the father and hes really angry about it but i told him that it was my decision. he cant seem to get over the fact that he has to give up the right has a parent, which i dont understand, if he wanted an abortion. so thanks again

 

waffles - March 29

I dont believe in abortion WHAT SO EVER, so there fore i personally dont think you should. But its your decision. Adoption is great, theres so many families dieing to have a little baby. :)

 

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