Why So Young

18 Replies
happy - March 3

i am 19 and pregnant with my first child i have a great loving fiancee and a house car everything i am very lucky why are so many younger girls getting pregnant some that have not even started high school yet these girls should think because they are to young and wont want to care for a baby soon after giving birth it is really sad to have babies that wont be cared for by the mother and father together.

 

Mommy2Kylie - March 4

You can't sit here and say all young girls don't have men who stay by their sides. You're 19, thats how old I am. 19 doesn't make us anymore 'ready' to have a baby. We may be out of school and stuff, but we're just as clueless. As a teen Mom I'd expect you to be a little more sensitive and supportive. I have 2 cars, I have my own place, and a fiance, that doesn't make me any better then any of the girls here. Atleast their trying, thats why their coming on this support forum.

 

I agree - March 4

I totally agree with you "happy". I'm sure alot of these girls pregnancys arn't planned and to the ones that are planned....their mothers are being selfish. I don't mean to bash them but I am not goin to give them sympathy or pity. It is one thing to raise a child when you are 19...out of high school or college...have a job...a stedy bf or fiancee. But it is another thing to be 13...in elementary school...living with your parents...and having s_x with boys who are just started producing sperm. These girls only thing of themselves when they plan to get pregnant at such a young age. They don't stop to think that their babies are probably going to be raised by their grandparents beacuse they are gonna be trying to go to school...have friends...try and get their licenses etc. It is just sad beacuse when these girls plan on getting pregnant they dont reilize that they have so many more years to wait. They are going to miss out on partying, going to moives..spending time with their friends...shopping etc. It is just really sad when teenage girls don't get the chance to act like teenage girls

 

becca - March 4

to happy thats good your happy but your not actually in any position to jugde just because he is your fiancee he could still leave you just like any other man

 

I agree - March 4

Becca...i think you missed her point

 

chelle - March 4

i had my 1st at 16 and my 2nd at 19. I was with their father but he was never around. I didn't have a problem caring for my children. Ever. I didn't see a problem with sacrificing my childhood for something so beautiful. I did not plan either of them but I am the type of person who lies in the bed I make. You live...You learn. I am a wonderful mother alone or not. Mommy and Daddy all in one:)

 

I agree - March 4

Chelle, I am happy that you have two happy babies and that you made it on your own. Did you plan your first baby? Do you feel that you were better able to take care of the child you had at 19 that the one you did at 16?

 

chelle - March 4

at 16yrs old children were furtherst from my mind. i was just as responsible for my first at 16 as my second at 19. However, at 19 i was of course better off finacially and a lot more experienced in being a parent. Being a teen parent is hard but it most definitely can be done. Sacrifice is the key word. I didn't give it up, i just have to put it on hold for a long while:)

 

I agree - March 4

Chelle, well that was the point I was trying to make. I mean it is sad to see girls on here saying that they want a baby and they are 12, 13, 14, 15 or 16 years old. They think it is all fun and games and that if they get pregnant their bf's will stay with them and they will get married and have a big happy family and live happily ever after. They need a big time reality check! I'm glad everything worked out for you and your children. What are their names?

 

PP - March 4

You are very right most of the young girls on here are going to end up punishing their parents and their children because they thought s_x was cool. Very few teen girls step up to the plate and succeed. Personally I think it is wrong to have s_x outside of marriage.

 

Audrey - March 4

To agree- Some people I know have said that many teenagers believe that they're "immortal" and nothing bad can happen to them. Plus there are the perpetuated myths that "you can't get pregnant on your first time", "you can't get pregnant if..." and things like that. Young people do need a reality check and more education on these issues if they're going to become more responsible.

 

Reba - March 4

My mom was a teen Mommy Got pg at 16 (in 1979 that would be the equivalent to a 13yr old now) After talking to her...she felt unloved, she wasn't well supervised, and had some bad information....and was stupid by her own admission. She didn't figure it out until 4husbands and 3kids by different men later. She's now happily married with another kid at 42. You have to let yourself grow up and heal the old wounds.

 

Reba - March 4

Another thing...anti pregnancy myths...I volunteered at at crisis pregnancy center, there are some ODD ones and some just plain stupid. A young woman came in and told me she didn't think she could get pregnant because she had more than one partner and their sperm would cancel each other out....ummm no you're just twice as likely to get pregnant.

 

Giselle - March 4

why do they have to have s_x before turning at least 18 in the first place? Or being married...

 

KM - March 4

Giselle, not being rude, but everyone takes a different stand and has different morals and beliefs when it comes to s_x. we cannot ask someone why they didnt wait till marriage or a specific age, its not everyone's belief.

 

becca - March 5

did i ....? o yea i did sorry are you talking about people who plan there pregnancys?? y do younger girls not wont to care for there babys not long after?? i know i will i c your point but your still young as well but good luck to you

 

KM - March 5

Becca's point was still relevant to the post I think, and it was a good one.the percentage of adult single mothers compared to teens, is probably only slightly lower. Why younger girls don't want to care for their babies long after, is because eventually the novelty of being a new mom wears off, and it is seriously hard. You miss your friends, you miss being able to go out. You can't even go to the store without carting your baby with you.I find it hard, but I do it without any help, my bf works all the time. It is exhausting and completely life consuming. I think many realize after that they weren't ready to dedicate their life to this just yet. Becca, not trying to scare you off I'm sure you will still care for your baby and do a great job, but there will be times where you will find it extremely hard, and wish you could have waited.( i know your pregnancy wasn't planned) At the end of the day it is all worth it, but there are times where you want to pull your hair out, and you feel so different from everyone else your age.

 

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