Feeling Really Anxious Need Some Advice

4 Replies
bubbasmom - May 6

Hi ladies, I am almost 30 weeks pregnant with my second son. I am having mixed emotions about actually meeting my little guy. I'm excited to have him here, but at the same time worried about how my then 2.5 year old will react. I'm already sad about losing time with him and am afraid he is going to regress and be really angry. His whole world is going to change because of a decision my dh and I made and I just feel so sad for him. I know having a brother will be great when they are older, but I feel bad for him now. I'm also dreading the newborn period as it didn't go well with my first son due to some medical issues. I just really need words of encouragement so I can feel more excited instead of scared.

 

Whitney - May 6

Hi, I don't really have advice for you but wanted to let you know you are not alone - I am in the exact same boat as you. I'm 30 weeks & expecting a girl, I also have a 2 1/2 year old son. We spoil him rotten with attention & I am worried about how another baby will affect him when I no longer have the same amount of time to spend with him. I worry that the baby will keep him up at night & the lack of sleep for me will make me grumpy so I wont be "cheerfull happy mommy" as usual. I just keep telling him about his sister & that she's coming to live with us soon & told him her name, & that he's such a big boy now & I have been getting him to help me decorate the room so he feels involved. I also make a point of telling him that his sister is so excited to meet him & she loves him so much & he starts to get all excited to meet her. It will be a hard change at first ( i dread that newborn stage too) but our little guys will eventually adjust to having a sibling & will be for the better in the long run. I just feel better now knowing that they will have each other so if anything ever happened to me & my husband they will not be alone.

 

preggosauce - May 7

I too am in the exact same boat. I WANT to be only excited about the upcomming arrival of our baby girl (I'm 27.5 weeks) yet, we have a 20 month old daughter and I'm just so affraid of how she's going to react, and how she's going to feel about the new baby. Like you I too DREAD the newborn period as my daughter was VERY fussy and then ended up being VERY sick for a long period of time (we were in the hospital over 30 days). My husband was deployed at the time too, so all I know is how hard it was, and I'm trying to prepare my husband...I'm so affraid of it being hard again. Plus, now instead of having one child, I'll have to work out spending my time with the both of them, trying to meet all of their needs. Kind of scary. Though, My advice is just remember although you are feeling unsure now...that, I hear, will pa__s and everything will just fall into place. Your giving your son a best friend for life. I knew If I had one child I'd have to have another just so they'd have a sibling. I am SO close with my sister and I want that same thing for my daughters. I try and remind myself of this whenever I start to doubt...

 

bubbasmom - May 7

Thank you both so much for your replies. I think that people have this vision that they should only feel excitement with a new baby, but I actually feel sad about losing time with my son. I'm just hoping he adjusts well and we are preparing the best we can. Preggosauce, our situations sound a bit similar (although yours was defintely worse). My dh had back surgery when my son was 10 days old and couldn't help at all for about 2 months and I was also taking care of him. Then my son ended up in the hospital for a few days. He ended up being allergic to milk/soy and would scream and scream in pain before we realized this. So, I'm also not looking forward to the newborn stage and trying to manage two. But, I feel so much better knowing I'm not alone in my fears. Again, thank you both so much

 

kendra.marie - May 7

bubbasmom- i dont know how to say it but if your previous son has been in daycare & around children & he enjoys them no worries at first he might be a bit jealous but he will surely adapt to his little brother & love him easier then you thought it would be. im almost 32 weeks pregnant with a little boy; i have a 20 month old daughter & she loves that shes going to have a brother although i dont think she completely understands but she LOVES babies no doubts & she loves kids so im not worried to how she will react. just to ease your mind.

 

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