Feeling Unattractive To My Husband

19 Replies
orie - April 17

im 34 weeks pregnant and me and my husband havent had s_x for i htink a month now. He says its because he feels the baby and its uncomfortable, but it just makes me feel so unattractive! I've told him its safe to but he does'nt want to...Also when i see a girl pass by i just always think hes looking at her and i get so sad and angry Should i believe that thats the problem or do i really seem unattractive to him.? I've gained like 40 lbs but its all to the baby fat....i really just have the tummy in the front....anyone in the same situation?

 

Suzanne - April 17

I have not had s_x in 6 months because he says he feels uncomfortable invading the babies space. Trust me - he loves you and thinks you are beautiful - you are making his baby. Men are weird - just go with the flow. I am 37+ weeks.

 

cyndrz632 - April 17

Hey i know sorta how you feel!! its been a week since me and my fiance had s_x..but everytime a girl pa__ses by i think that im so ugly and i think that he is embara__sed to be with me..i dont know if its me or what :(:( hang in there!! when you have the baby everything will be fine!

 

Karen S - April 17

I agree with Suzanne he loves you and yes men are just strange sometimes or wait I mean all the time:) Maybe you should tell him how your feeling, thats what I did with mine. I felt the same way and I still do at 37 weeks. He try's to make me feel better and sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't, but he does try. Talk to him and tell him how your feeling. Good Luck

 

meme - April 17

Let him read the truth that it does nothing to the baby. And if he means he feels the baby through your stomach, try a different position or two. You probably have no reason to worry about wandering eyes, but hypothetically if that's what he was doing, I'd worry that my relationship was based on physicality only. But I'm sure he likes & loves you for a lot more than that. Besides, lots of men think pregnant bodies are the most beautiful they've ever seen. And rightly so!

 

ash2 - April 17

honey, NO man is tha blessed to feel the baby . you actually have to go past the cervix and that is only if you are dialated. HOWEVER, i am 34 weeks too, and i dont want to really have s_x because i cant breath laying down :) i do feel unattractive around other women that are in shorts this time of year.

 

Renee-Marie - April 18

I'm with you! Bit at least you can have s_x! I'm on bedrest and s_x is not on the approved list of activities. Consider yourself lucky that you can do it if you want to, no matter how uncomfortable.

 

Bee99 - April 18

Has anyone had men say to them that they love pregnant women and that they have a certain something even when I was not pregnant my DH said that if there was a line of women he would be attracted to the pregant women (not s_xualy)I said to him "Thats a__suming I was not in that line" but Im 35 weeks pregnant and even a school teacher metioned it to me just about every pregancy at some stage a man I hardly know comments on it.

 

keenya - April 18

I am in the same situation!!! My husband only has s_x with me about once every 2 weeks. I feel the same way you do!!!

 

Amanda R - April 19

Well, my DH is pretty much the opposite. He still wants to have s_x and tells me how beautiful I am...BUT I feel less attractive than ever! It's really hard to get into the "mood" when you feel like a beached whale. I'd say we are averaging having s_x once every 2 weeks or so. Most of the time I give in just cause I feel bad for him. I know he will have a long wait after I deliver so I try to indulge him. S_x hurts so bad anymore anyway that I don't look forward to it very much!! We don't have much longer to go though. I am anxious to get back to where it doesn't hurt and I can get in the mood again.

 

livdea - April 19

Bee99...I have never been hit on more in my entire life, now that I'm pregnant! And I had a hot lil bod before! SO many guys I run into are completely attracted to this pregnant belly! And in a s_xual way! I've been asked on so many dates and have been told that its some guys fantasies to be with a pregnant woman! I'm not interested in dating at this point but it's very flattering, especially when I'm feeling less then attractive these days! I've definitely seen the men comming out of the wood works though to ask me out. I thought it would be the EXACT opposite!

 

tlew - April 19

Orie all pregnant women are beautiful. Maybe you should remind him how much longer he will have to wait after the baby is born. Tell him that s_x will help u in labor by working those muscles ;). Try having a romantic evening with some candles and sparkling cider. I tell my husband that Love created this miracle and that love should always be shared. good luck.

 

livdea - April 19

tlew...I agree! Try setting the mood for HIM...I'm sure he'll get into it! only 40lbs is great! Not a lot! Sounds like you may have to put some effort into helping him, but pregnant women ARE beautiful!! Slip into something cute and turn the lights down low...there's no way he'll be able to resist! good luck!!

 

mom2b2x - April 19

Ok my hubby is just the opposite he says he wants to have s_x all the time and ever since my doctor told him that we should do it 2x a day he has been even worse . i am 37 week s and 2 days and i have s_x with him about every other day and he complains that it just seems so mechanical and i am like what do you want me to do i cant get into those funny positions anymore really all i can do is lay there . but this has not been the case the whole pregnacy from like month 3-6 i didnt want anything he was lucky to get it once a week but now i we are trying to help my cervix soften and dilate which s_x helps so we do it like every other day .... also as far as wondering if your dh thinks you are unattractive as hard as it may be try not to feel that way ... has he done anything other than say he didnt want to have s_x becasue of the baby ? that is a natural response for some men becasue while they are excited you are prego at the same time keep in mind the baby is invading what your dh considers to be his space and it does feel diffrent down there to him not so much that he is feeling the baby though.. try taking him to your next ob appt and ask the doctor in front of him so he hears the dr ok it and rea__sure him that he will not harm the baby also remind him that after the baby comes he has to wait 4-6 weeks to do it then so he better get it while he can and while you are willing ... if all else fails and you are comfortable with this ...use a vibrator ( outside only ) and it helps you to feel like you are more s_xual ... Good luck to all and just in case this was not meant to be offensive in any way

 

meme - April 19

I'm just about 40 weeks, and s_x is uncomfortable for me at this point in pregnancy unless I have lubricant. But I'll tell ya... my partner loves having s_x with me more than ever... because the part of discomfort for me comes from the v____al ca___l temporarily feeling that much smaller/shorter. Tell your husband that, and he'll rethink everything! lol

 

AML - April 19

S_x hasnt been on my favorites list since being pregnant! I would say in the last 34 weeks we have done it maybe 15 times....MAYBE! lol....I just dont want it. Sometimes I give in, I refuse to do anything oral because it makes me sick! S_x has been hurting lately, he thinks I am just trying to make excuses! I am not!!! I kinda feel bad for him....but then again, if I dont want to go it then too bad!

 

AML - April 19

do it....not go it...lol sorry typo!

 

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