Going Back To Work

18 Replies
Sue - February 8

I quit my job at 4 months and now I am 30 weeks. My fiance asked me last night if I had been thinking about when I will be going back to work after the baby comes. We both are professionals and if I don't go back to work it is ok financially. I said maybe 6 months? and he said isn't the normal maternity leave 6 weeks? He says he wants me to be happy and productive. I am just trying to get through being pregnant and the last thing on my mind is work. What are you guys planning to do after the baby comes?

 

Allie - February 8

I'm planning on staying at home, I'm also a professional and have a master s degree, but I wouldn't change my plans, I want to rise my baby and be with him to teach him all the things he needs to learn. I wouldn't want someone else to rise my baby and be the first to see him crawling, talking,eating solids, etc..

 

Kel - February 8

I'll be going back to work after 12 weeks of maternity leave. I would love to stay home with my little one, but I just don't think we would be able to live comfortably as we are used to.

 

jilly bean - February 8

see i am going back to work and dont have too...the nice part is being an er nurse i am going back maybe two nights a week and that way i can keep my fingers in my career and it gives me a little time away too being that i will be home all day and it also will give my husband sometime too to have alone time with the baby. i guess what i am saying is i am going back to work for a little piece a mind and social interaction away from home....being a housewife is a hard job and we need a break from it sometime i guess i look at work as the break i'll need.

 

Marlene - February 8

I'm going back to work when the baby is 6weeks old. Disability will only pay me that long and I'm a single mother so if I dont go back there will be no money. I would love to stay home until he is at least 3months but that isnt possible.

 

Hannah - February 8

I would love to go back to grad school full time. :)

 

redhead mary - February 8

Im staying home for at least a year... I didnt even qualify for mat leave, so were going to be living off my man ..AND we have a 5 1/2 year old to support too... but its ALL worth it in the end!!!!! Kudos to the mommies who HAVE to go back because they are single...You ladies deserve a medal!

 

shelly - February 8

i'm going back when my baby is 6 weeks, thats how long my work pays for. Me and my hubby need to work. I already have been off for 5 weeks, I'm due on sunday.

 

mel - February 8

I'll be returning to work 6 weeks after baby is born, but only because I have to. not so much for financial reasons as the fact that my job is the one we have medical and dental insurance on. I'd love to take off a year. sigh.....

 

Allie - February 8

I admire and support all of you going to work because you have the financial need!! My mom did this too. You're child will thank you some day for this sacrifice, I remember growing up, I always wanted my Mom to stay at home, but now I understand and and I really thank her because I was able to go to school, and college because of her and my Dad working.

 

Girl Gilly - February 8

This is one situation where the U.S. and Canada differ greatly. I will be taking a year off, which is covered by the Gov't here. Through this website I have learned so much about the U.S. system. It has got to be so tough on all of you to go back to work so quickly, not to mention expensive trying to find childcare. In Canada, there is even talk of extending mat leave to two years, which i think is a bit too much - from the employers side of things. I do not plan on coming back to the job I am at right now. I hired a replacement who I think will work really well here for the long term so I feel no guilt whatsover about leaving. I am so ready to leave this job.

 

6 weeks isn't long enough - February 8

well my going back to work wont provide my child with nothing more than food, shelter, and clothes. Im a single mom, 1st child, living barely paycheck to paycheck. After all bills are paid & necessities met I will have $ 15 a week ! I don't know what I'll do if my car breaks down, or a medical emergy comes up for baby or myself. I have to go on food stamps and daycare a__sistance just to make ends meet. You ladies say we deserve a medal..for what?? Not being able to bond as much with our child, not being able to afford to do ANYTHING? Taking a chance that someone will mistreat your 6 week old baby in a lousy daycare cuz you cant afford a nice one? Or having your baby recognize someone else before you? No..... I dont want a medal. I want cheaper rent, a better job, or to be married so I could have some financial & emotional support. You ladies who get to stay home I hope you realize how fortunate you are. Have you ever sat down and seriously thought what you would do if you worked minimum wage, were single and pregnant? It's not easy. I wish I lived in canada where atleast they get more maternity leave than we do. It's ridiculous here.

 

mel - February 8

to "6 weeks isn't long enough". I don't know if it's the pregnancy hormones or what right now, but I started crying when I read your response. you see, when I had my first child, I was in the same situation as you are in now. and all the emotion that you show in your post, are all familiar feelings to me. Not that you are asking for support or advice in your post, but I wish so bad there was something I could say to you that would show that you things really will work out and be allright. things get really hard, but you'll find strength when you thought you had none left and emergencies and surprises will pop up, but things REALLY do have a strange way of working themselves out. I remember when I was pregnant and went to file for a__sistance and they told me that I made $15 too much a month to qualify for foodstamps or daycare a__sistance. I just sat there looking at these people in disbelief. amazing. and I definately remember crying my eyes out, when I thought of how my son would probably think the lady at the daycare was his real mommy or that I didn't love him becuase I left him everyday. OMG....what a horrible feeling. but you know what? none of that ever happened. he KNEW who mommy was, and we have an extremely close relationship now. no regrets. sorry to ramble....like I said, your post just brought back memories for me. I guess what I really wanna say is hang in there, because things DO get better and I'm a FIRM believer now in, "that which does not kill us, can only make us stronger". take care, girl.

 

Melanie - February 8

Sue, why not wait to seriously consider this question until after the little one arrives on the scene? It's impossible to know how you'll be feeling about it until then. It's is a crying shame that so many families don't have the opportunity to have a parent at home, and if you have the option to spend time with the little one, it's worth doing for awhile. it's good for both of you. You might find that there's no place you'd rather be.....or you might realize that while you love it, that you need the stimulation that your career gives you, too. Perhaps then there will be some sort of part-time options, so you can have the best of both worlds? Roll it around a little, but don't think too hard on it or commit to anything just yet, since you don't absolutely have to. Best wishes!

 

Cry me a river - February 8

Boo hoo to you "six weeks isn't long enough". It's people like you who get pregnant, unexpectdly and then expect the governement to pay for you because you can't afford to be a single person with a child. Maybe while you were working when you were pregnant, you should have been taking cla__ses at the community college to get an education for a job that pays more than minimum wage. You are trying to make those who get to be SAHM's feel badly because YOU are in a bad position and they are not. You seem to be bitter and it's your own fault. You should also be thankful that you are getting medical and daycare a__sistance through your state instead of b___hing and moaning about it. What redhead mary meant by a medal to single mothers who have to go back to work is that it's hard work and takes a lot out of the mother, financially and physically and emotionally. Fix that chip on your shoulder lady, you have no one to be mad at but yourself.

 

kara - February 8

To "cry me a river"-Your post was very rude. She didn't seem to be angry or blaming anyone. She was simply venting, and pointing out that those of us who are able to stay home should be very thankful. To "six weeks isn't long enough", I am sorry for your situation. Do you have any supportive friends or family who can help you?? Or possibly a crisis pregnancy center. They often help with things like medical care and baby clothes and gear. (and do NOT rely on govn't support). I hope that you are still able to enjoy anticipating your little one! A baby is a wonderful blessing no matter what!!

 

Girl Gilly - February 8

To Cry Me A River....I think it is a lot to a__sume that just because "6 weeks isn't long enough" is a single mom that the baby was unexpected. I do not know her situation but at least I have an open mind. Perhaps you should find out the situation before you start casting blame. Every woman has different circ_mstances and deserves to be supported.

 

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