Top 3 Fears About L Amp D

12 Replies
FlyBear - November 21

I'm just curious... What are everyone's top 3 fears about labor and delivery? Mine would be: 1. That he's big and gets stuck and rips me to pieces down there. 2. That I poop on myself during delivery. 3. That my husband will freak out. At this point I think he's more scared of labor than I am. He THINKS it would be uncomfortable for him if my best friend were in the delivery room when I deliver. I've tried explaining to him that it's a long tiring process for him as well as me and that he might actually enjoy having someone around to stay with me for a lil while if he needs to rest or get some food or something but he just really thinks it'd be best just me and him... but then at the same time he's scared of watching me get the epidural, he's nervous about all sorts of stuff and I'm thinking the support would be good for him as well. lol

 

kmoselle - November 21

My husband wants me to get a c-section. He thinks a baby coming out down there will ruin me for him s_xually. Yet he wants me to b___stfeed, which I would think that would also ruin my breats for him s_xually. Sometimes men just don't make any sense. I was considering having my sister in there with us. She used to be an ob/gyn nurse and I figured she would be able to calm dh down. I think he will be more of a wreck than me. He can't stand the sight of blood, and he won't even allow me a mirrow to watch (he absolutely cannot see anything!). But at the same time, I would like it to be just us, as this is a moment that I want to be so special. But like you- I have the same fears. I'm worried something will go wrong, that i will poop on myself and that my dh will freak out or won't be supportive enough or something. I also fear the pain. Oh, I am not looking forward to the pain!!!

 

FlyBear - November 21

This is our first baby and I moved away from all my friends and family to be with him and get married and all (he's military) and still haven't really made any good friends where we're at now so it's kind of important to me that my friend wants to come and be here for everything. She and my mom are really the only friends I have now that I've moved away and gotten married and all. I don't necessarily care if she is or isn't in the room when the baby is actually born but I think her being there during the active labor and the painful contractions and afterwards is going to be a nice help to both me and him. I can already tell this is going to take a toll on him as well. He's a wonderful man but like yours KMO he's not much on blood, pain, and needles so I honestly feel like he might realize if she's there that he appreciates having some support lol.

 

Teddyfinch - November 22

kmoselle you might read up on these things first. b___stfeeding won't necessarily ruin your b___sts at all and your husband is an a__s. sorry. a c section isn't some simple surgery. if you having the child the two of you made worries him about how he'll be pleased later (s_xually) then he's too shallow to bother with.

 

mjvdec01 - November 23

Teddy, I knew you would respond to that. LOL

 

iona - November 23

Sorry buy kmoselle your hubby is a selfish ignorant person saying that he wants to put YOU and your BABY at risk in order for him to perserve your v agina for his pe n i s!! Is that really all he can say to you about the birth. YUCKY! He is totally wrong. Have him talk to a doctor, do some internet research and get educated.

 

Skyeblue - November 23

Have to agree with iona, My biggest fear would be my hubby being so d__n selfish and stupid to tell me to get a c-section because he thinks it will "spare" my v____a! Poor you kmoselle.

 

kmoselle - November 24

Thanks for your input, but my hubby is not an a__s. He has 2 daughters from a previous marriage who were both delivered c-section, so it is all he knows. That is normal to him. He does not like all the blood and goop that comes with a v____al delivery, or even with menstration. He's a little weird when it comes to bleeding down there, but it doesn't make him an a__s. He is actually very supportive in me wanting a v____al delivery. I don't fault him for his weird thoughts on the subject because he can't help that it makes him squimish. And I think it is a normal worry that it will get so stretched out down there that s_x won't be pleasureable anymore. That is not only his worry, but mine too. Just normal worries which are actually nothing to worry about. We both know this.

 

FlyBear - November 24

Wow, you guys were a bit harsh. We're on here to support each other and share in our excitment and losses. Chill out. Not everyone has the same opinion on things. Some people adore being pregnant, some people HATE it, other people, such as myself, go back and forth on it. Some people prefer v____al births and other's like c-sections. I myself am worried about my v____a after giving birth. It's incorrect for anyone to say that it's a for sure thing for it to go back to normal afterwards. I've met people who have had to have surgery to fix their ability to control their muscles down there after v____al births. It is a realistic fear and maybe not one that everyone has but not something to speak so harshly to someone over either. He's her husband and she loves him and it's not our business to judge him or their relationship. I'm sure most of you women would flip out if someone started bashing your husband. If you wanna make a point you should maybe try asking her why it is that he put's s_xual pleasure ahead of the health and safety of his wife and unborn child. That would probably have been a lot less offensive and made the same point. Okay, I'm done on my soap box. I just don't like seeing that cause I would be really p__sed and hurt if everyone went off on my husband over something silly I mentioned. He's a wonderful man, a great provider, and wants the best for his family but I understand KMO's position cause he is totally freaked out by the whole birthing process too.

 

iona - November 25

Sorry. You are right, that sounded harsh. No ands, ifs or b___ts : )

 

mrsvalenti - November 25

Kmoselle: I completely understand! My husband thinks that the period is just the nastiest thing ever...I guess us women are just used to it cuz we've had to deal with it for so many years. :-P Anyway, my top fear about labor and deliver is PAIN. Yes, yes, I am a wuss. :) Another big fear is that something will go wrong with the baby.

 

bbdreams - November 25

I have to agree with mrsvalenti - my biggest fear is that something will go wrong(like the baby will have the umbilical cord wrapped around her neck, or she won't be in the right position and they will have to use forceps etc). Then the pain is a CLOSE second lol. I keep trying to imagine what the contractions will feel like(this is my first). I want to try and deliver with no epidural(I hate and fear needles so a big needle in the back is not sounding so great lol). But then I think - what if it hurts too much to bare? Guess I'll have to see what happens on 'game day'. Oh and having to get an episiotomy that is another fear - I really don't want that lol.

 

lovncr - November 25

My biggest fears are pain and something going wrong during the delivery. When I get stomach pains I curl up into a ball. They say contractiosn feel like really bad pains in the stomach..Another thing is will my husband be strong enough to stay in the delivery room with me or will he wuss out.

 

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