Mr Attitude Has Moved In

11 Replies
eclectic66 - November 30

I was wondering at what age is it that your lo's started showing some serious att_tude? My ds just turned 16 months and OMG! He has been throwing these temper tantrums if I put any kind of food that he is not happy about in front of him (which is totally new for him to do) Also when he is really mad he will actually start to hit me (not in the face, but more like arms flailing and trying to push me away type of hit)..also he has recently started to bite...now when he does the biting he is not mad, but he will just all of a sudden out of nowhere look at your arm or leg and go down for the bite! All this behavior has just started and is so new for me...where did my sweet little baby go?? Lol Anyway, I was just curious as to when your children started to have these phases and how do you deal with them? Any tips? Thanks in advance for your replies :-)

 

mlm056 - November 30

LOL!! You just described by 17mth ds! All the same examples. He started at 15 mths.. I'll never forget it. He wanted me to turn the tv on and I won't, he threw himself on the ground and rolled around screaming! I was like, what the heck?? SInce when did the terrible two's start at 15 months! Jacob will also bite dh and I but not other children (thank goodness). Most of the time it is just 'love bites'.. I think it's to relieve teething as he was biting everthing -- candles, tables etc. We firmly say "NO Jacob, NO biting, give us KISSES" when it comes to food and he throws a fit. We remove the food from him and tell him to use his 'words' and to talk softly. Then we ignore him for a few minutes. He always calms down. Once he is calm we will introduce a food we know he will eat, like peas or banana.. then after he eats that we will go back to the original food that caused the problem. So far this has worked, although it's a ton of work. But I feel that it's better to have the work now rather than have to deal with it when he is 2,3,4 years old. OH, yes, re: the flailing arms etc when they are mad.. I would gently put him in his crib and tell him I love him and I will stay in the room until he calms down. Both our boys are so big that they can really throw their weight around so I am always afraid I will drop him when he started the arms swinging. Luckily that 'flailing' stage only lasted 2 weeks. Anyways, hope this helps!

 

AudreyC - November 30

My dd just turned two but she's had a stubborn streak almost from day 1, being a redhead! She's usually well behaved and isn't fussy about her food. However when she doesn't get her way she will complain or cry, and stamp her feet. She does not hit anyone, and she only kicks if she doesn't want anyone to change her diaper even if it does need to be changed. Our usual tactic to ease a tantrum is to reason with her calmly in words she can understand, or sit her down in a chair until she calms down. In a really bad situation she's given a time-out in her crib.

 

DDT - December 1

Oh yes...my ds1 also started at the same age. He was probably 15-16 months old. He was a great eater before that and then immediately started becoming picky about everything. Hates sitting at his high chair. Screaming & lots of tantrums & hitting. We also brought his baby brother into his life at the time. So, lots of changes. It was especially bad for a couple of months, and after being consistent and firm he got better. Your baby is changing and becoming a toddler! Strong-willed, stubborn, particular, discovering his independence. When he would hit us we would sternly say "Don't hit Mama!" consistently. We tried saying "No, don't hit!" but that created a spiral effect of him yelling back at us "No, no, no!!" and so the fit would continue. So, we try not to use the word "no" in our house too much. When he gets especially out of control and just won't calm down we put him in his crib with his blankie for about 5 mins. Now at 21 months he is becoming more verbal so doesn't have as much tantrums as before because he can communicate what he wants.

 

Justine1 - December 1

My DD (3) has always been well behaved but my DS (22 months) for a few months has been Mr Seriously Grumpy at times. He was also the sweetest of babies just putting his arms out and saying duddle momma. He still is really sweet most of the time, still wanting lots of cuddles and kissing a lot but he goes through really grumpy phases. He used to eat everything but recently has got fussier and asks for ice cream, biscuits and cake all the time and thinks savoury food isn't for him so we have food battles. Over the past month he's started to hit and bite me - its very gentle like he just bites my clothes and sort of pats me but I still want to stop it. He doesn't bite other children fortunately. I tell him No biting/pushing etc sometimes just kissing. He always will immediately kiss often without me saying. He has also taken to screaming just for the fun of it which is quite annoying. When he does this I find its best to ignore him, if you ask him what he wants it makes him worse. He often wakes up grumpy says "I want milk", you give him milk and he throws it and says No then 10 secs later he picks it up drinks it and he's then singing happily. My Mum says boys are worse than girls and those that start tantrums early end them early - I certainly hope so but I'll believe it when I see it! Nick has been able to say what he wants for a while now so I don't think its that, often he's worse when he's tired I've noticed. I've just started putting him in the corner if he's naughty for 1 minute and that seems to work for a bit anyway! He understands he's not supposed to push etc I think as he goes round saying "No pushing Mummy, no pushing Mummy, no pushing Mummy" in a silly voice like he's trying to imitate me. This morning he bit me gently on the bottom - I normally say no biting, just kissing but I couldn't then - lol.

 

in the woods - December 1

When my dd was 15 months old, someone commented on "terrible twos". I thought, what terrible twos? My baby was so sweet. She had exactly a year of att_tude from 2 to 2 weeks to her 3rd b/d, when she turned into an angel overnight. I dont' have any particular advice, I think it's a parent bootcamp for teenage (or tween-age) years. My boy has had this period less defined, his personality is more of free-spirit, so it's still going on, and I'm afraid always will be... He's a month shy of 4.

 

Seredetia - December 1

I think all toddlers go through this at some point or another -- trying to let us know that they are independant. My daughter bit at around this age and we just told her that it wasn't nice to bite. Your tone is more important that what you actually say, I think, because if I got heated and yelled it to her, she would laugh. No good. Now she's into flailing at 21 months. She will just stop whatever she's doing and keel over backwards -- dangerous. If something is in her way, I will protect her head and then ignore her (if we're at home -- I'll be darned if I let her get away with it in a restaurant!! I take her to the car or outside until she's calm) Best of luck to you, my cousin said that her son lost his mind from about 2 until just about 4...and then he turned "normal" again. lol. ouch...

 

eclipse - December 2

Yeah, my little one started getting all crazy-like around 16 months. His tantrums can be epic, but luckily are usually confined to home. He can be so whiny, especially when he gets home before bed, it drives me nuts! And now he is doing the sit down strike shriek fest if he doesn't get his way. I know this sounds horrible, but sometimes I have to go in the other room so he doesn't see me laughing because he is so dramatic. Good luck, it is going to be an interesting few months for all of us! :D

 

eclectic66 - December 2

wow! i feel a lot better knowing that this seems to be the "norm" for this age (and for what sounds like all the way up until...teenage years! lol) i appreciate the tips as well. it sounds like dh and i need to sit down and make sure we are both on the same page when it comes to how to deal with these tantrums because i would hate for us both to be doing something different in reaction to it. Eclipse- I must say that i cracked up after reading what you wrote about having to leave the room to keep your ds from seeing you laugh when he throws a fit because i too have had to turn my head so that my ds can't see me laughing because when he all of a sudden just starts to scream...he will throw his arms and legs out (all 4 extremities become stiff as a board) and his face turns red and omg! it just is such a site i cant help but become amused by this display...but i know if he see's me that this will definetly NOT help...lol ya, i think they need to change it from terrible 2's to perhaps "terrible toddlers"...lol so far the best method i have come up with in dealing with him when he starts to scream is distracting him....dh will say "no sir...we do not scream" and will say it in a firm voice and he seems to respond to that at times, but not always. i too will say "no screaming" in my firm voice, but dh pointed out that my firm voice is not too firm...lol so i will need to work on that i guess. and so begins the great challenge of parenting....discipline :-/ agggggg

 

AngelinLuv - December 2

My 12 month old has actually had an att_tude for probably a month or two. He doesn't bite yet, but will screech/yell really loud, flail his arms, and cry hysterically when he is taken away from something or not allowed to do something he wants.

 

Malica - December 2

*Gulp* DD is coming up on 15 months now and sounds like the "sweet happy child" that everyone else describes their kids as before they hit this phase. I'm not looking forward to this!

 

kimberly - December 3

My dd is 16 months too and she has started to pull my hair and has bitten me. Her brothers are older and they fight like siblings do sometimes so she will also hit them with things. At this age timeouts are hard, but at about 18 to 20 months or so a 2 min. timeout in a chair against the wall with no toys or interaction if done right can really be effective. With my dd now I tell her no firmly and say that hurts! Sometimes she will stop, but most of the time she is stubborn and I have to remove her from the situation or turn her attention to something else. I think it is important to try and explain to them what they are doing hurts, because at thier young age they don't get that what they are doing hurts at first so everytime make sure he knows it hurt you. All my kids had the terrible two syndrome long before thier 2nd birthdays.

 

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