Sex Selection

7 Replies
Reem - October 24

Hi everybody! I am not quite sure which forum does this question belong to but I am hoping to get some of your ideas about it. What do you think of s_x/gender selection of your baby? I know that most fertility centers do not normally offer this option, however, there are some that do. I would like to know what do people think about this, as it doesn't seem to have been discussed much yet. Suppose you are undergoing an IVF/ICSI treatment for infertility, why not carry out one extra genetic testing on your embryos, if all available info so far says there is no harm to the embryo related with this testing; Let's suppose the case is purely of family balancing (e.g. you already have 2-3 sons and really want one daughter), not for example to avoid gender-related disease. Why not do it? Thanks in advance for all the inputs.

 

Evelyn - October 24

I don't think my fertility clinic does it, but I sure wish they did! My husband and I have both always wanted a boy. (I grew up a tomboy myself) I went through IVF and they picked out the two best looking embryo's and I am now pregnant with twin girls! Believe me, my whole life all I've ever wanted was to be a mom, and going through infertility has been very hard...so trust me when I say that I am very grateful for being pregnant with these two babies, and the most important thing is there health. I just want to have two beautiful healthy babies. However, if they actually gave you the option to chose...I would have. I would have chosen a boy and a girl, because after this pregnany, my husband and I really don't want anymore kids. Two is enough with exp___ses and everything else. So definately a boy and girl would have been awesome! But I will love my girls just as much, this is the way God chose it for me, so I will embrace it with open arms, and always thank him for just being pregnant in the first place.

 

My answer - October 24

When my husband and I were TTC, we got a book that told you how to naturally raise your chances of having a certain s_xed baby (certain foods, positions, etc...). It worked for us and we had a boy (the only boy out of 11 grandkids!) If we would have been going through IVF or something similiar and they would have offered s_x selection... we would have done it.

 

Reem - October 25

Thanks for both your responses. Evelyn, I almost cannot believe what I am reading from you! It is my story! Every single word of it! How far along are you now? I will complete 25wks tomorrow. The reason I asked the question is that if we ever find the strength to do this all again, I would really love to have a boy, but I am not quite sure of all the ethical and other implications of this. But what I am thinking is that if there is no danger to the embryo, why would there be any issue? On the other hand I do feel that it is quite a strange thing to be able to chose the s_x of your baby as you said, we must be happy with what God choses for us. So a bit confused about the whole thing. It's still long time into future and I know I should rather concentrate on this pregnancy! How are you handling yours? All the best of luck to you! Hope our girls are strong and healthy!

 

Evelyn - October 25

Reem, I am actually 21 weeks pregnant, will be 22 on the weekend. I guess it would be kinda strange to pick the s_x of the baby, but I'm sure there are tons of people that would pick that option if they had it. After all, who wouldn't love to be able to raise both a girl and a boy! I'm doing fairly well with my pregnancy. At first, I had VERY bad morning sickness, I was off of work for a month and in the hospital a couple of times to recieve fluids. (I actually got down to 92lbs) There are still things I worry about, like incompetent cervix. Also, I still barely ever feel my babies move. I'm hoping that that will come shortly within the next couple of weeks. I have a little backache and definately some heartburn. But for the most part, I really can't complain. I worry a little about my weight. I'm just now starting 6 months pregnant and I'm only 106 lbs. (I'm only 5 ft tall, normally around 98 lbs or so) But I just don't feel like I've gained enough, maybe that's why I don't feel the babies move as much? I don't know what has your experience been? I have a 3D sono of my babies coming up this Thursday, I'll definately let you know how that goes!

 

Reem - October 26

Hi Evelyn! Sorry to hear about your pregnancy troubles; they say we will forget all about them once we see our babies. I also had bad morning sickness, but not as bad as yours sounds. I was worried about babies not moving too, as everybody was saying you can feel them around week 18 and I didn't. But then they started kicking and turning I think about week 22 or 23 and now I am even worried and wondering why are they kicking me so hard! My major problems now are sore ribs and hips (can't sleep well because of that), i think the babies are trying to expand our little bodies as much as they can (I am 5ft 2). I feel very tired and sore after sitting at work for a few hours (specially my back) and was thinking of staying at home; for the time being I managed to change my timing to part time (9am-1pm only), which is great, but even that makes me tired! I am also quite disappointed with eating, as I thought I will have great appet_te during pregnancy and enjoy all the food; but even with the morning sickness gone, I still have to kind of force myself into eating and don't particularly like any food. The only good thing is that i drink a lot of water, i feel thirsty especially at night (and go to bathroom every hour, sometimes more!); very good luck to you on Thursday, let me know how it went; My next appointment is on 9 Nov; can't wait for that! Stay in touch and try to eat well, drink a lot and rest as much as you can! all the best!

 

Evelyn - October 26

I felt one pretty strong kick last night when I was laying down, but that's the first and only one I've felt. I'm really hoping to feel more like that soon, I'll be 22 weeks this weekend, so hopefully in another week or so I'll be having more like that. Even if it hurts, I'll probably only be experiencing it once in my whole life! Though I do understand about the sleep issue because I already have that without all the kicking! I get heartburn, have to get up to pee a lot, and depending on how I lay, even shortness of breath. On top of that, I do feel some movement...which that doesn't keep me up because of pain, but because I enjoy feeling it so much, lol! But as you said, when that starts to get stronger and more painful, I can't imagine I'll get much sleep at all. (Maybe this just prepares us for the lack of sleep we'll get once they are born!) You are very lucky to be able to change your time. I work 7:30-4 everyday, also at a sit down job, and I sure wish I could work half days! Do you plan on staying home once they are born? My job doesn't offer part time, so I will definately be staying home with my little ones as long as I can. I also really need to try and force myself to eat more, you'd think it would be so much easier, but I have the exact opposite problem as you. I have a very hard time drinking much of anything. Mostly because even before being pregnant, I have just never been a big drinker. As of lately I am really trying very hard to drink more water, but it is extremely hard for me, and I know that it's still not nearly enough. I will definately let you know how my test goes tomorrow, I couldn't imagine waiting until the 9th, even tomorrow seems so far away! We definately do need to stay in touch, if you don't mind, what is your e-mail address and that way we can keep in touch, even after our little ones are born.

 

Reem - October 29

Hi Evelyn! Nice to hear from you. How did your test go? It's good you feel the movements now, they will just get stronger and stronger. Sometimes I am surprised seeing them kicking on such strange places like my sides or somewhere up on top of my stomach. It's interesting. I am getting tired very fast these days. Even had to give up the weekend walk (which was the only 'sport' activity i was still able to do). Have you done you shopping for the girls? I have done mine a month ago or so, as I expected I might get bigger and unconfortable later; I am happy I did and don't go out at all now, except to work. How long do you plan on staying on your job? I thought with my short timings it will be easy, but it's getting more and more difficult every day. I am planning to stay home with the babies after they are born as long as possible, though a bit scared to be first time with only husband's salary, don't know how we will manage; but surely don't want to miss the things you experience with small babies after waiting so long for them! You are right, the days are pa__sing soo slowly waiting for my next appointment; i am hoping they will be more frequent now? (so far it has been once a month); it would be great if we mail each other; this is more of a dialogue anyway; my email is: [email protected] Looking forward to hear from you! Take care of all three of you!

 

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