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I understand how you feel. I also became pregnant from a one night stand. I was 27, had no job, and had recently moved in to my dads one bedroom apartment, sleeping in the living room. Things did not look good. I told the father and he really didn't have a reaction and since I hardly knew him I didn't have an emotional connection to him and I made a decision to keep the baby and not be with him. I too was upset over the idea of doing it alone and my child not having a father. I never contemplated an abortion or adoption because I think having the guilt of " what if " would have been harder than actually raising a child.A child eventually gets older and independent, where as the " what if " stays with you the rest of your life. That I could not deal with. So when my son was 6 weeks old I enrolled in a 2 year degree program, made my sacrifices and now my son is 3 years old, I have a great paying job, and I am so totally in love with my son that I couldn't imagine life without him. I actually enjoyed being single because that meant I didn't have to share him with anyone. I am a very strong willed, independent person to begin with, so I never was stressed out or thought I couldn't handle it. The love between a child and it's mother is something that words can't describe. Obviously I'm rooting for you to keep your baby. Remember, just because the childs father doesn't want to be a part of it's life, does NOT excuse him from his obligations to child support. If you choose to keep yoru baby, he has no choice in the matter. And don't be ashamed if you need help from the government, that's what it's there for. I was on medicaid and food stamps to help me thru college, then when I graduated and got my career going, I was able to discontinue those services. Also the government can help with daycare costs as well. If you put your mind to it, you can make having this baby a very rewarding choice. Just think, your only 21, when your 30 ( my age), your kid will already be 9! You'll still be in your prime and not tied down to caring for a toddler. You'll still be able to go out,date, and have fun. Also, I never felt lonely these past 3 years. My son has kept me company, kept my mind off of wanting to " go out ", and kept me responsible. Becoming a parent is a good thing if you let it and embrace it with a positive outlook. I met a man right before my son's 2nd birthday. He fell in love with me and my son and now I'm married and 9 months pregnant!!! You never know what the tide will bring in... I say ride the wave and see where it takes you!

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