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I am the mother of a former 23 weeker. Trust me when I tell you: if you had ANY idea what it's like to watch your baby fight to live, you wouldn't be so eager to have her born. You won't be able to "hold" her. Her skin will be too fragile. You won't be able to do much of anything, except sit and pray that her brain doesn't bleed, that she doesn't end up with cerebral palsy (or worse), that she learns to eat on her own, that she doesn't get an infection, etc... She'll likely battle learning disabilities, sensory disfunction, motor skill and speech delays as well as a host of other issues.

After she spends (assuming she survives) months in the NICU, she'll need oxygen at home and you won't be able to have people come visit, because they could introduce her to germs that could kill her. Chances are good she'll deal with damaged lungs for many years, meaning asthma problems.

Trust me when I tell you that weeping by your child's bedside, as they cry soundlessly (due to the ventilator tubing) during multiple iv stick attempts (and they finally place one in her head) is FAR more painful then ANYTHING you could endure during pregnancy.

I am pregnant again now and want nothing more then to be in pain, bloated and uncomfortable beyond endurance. Anything that means this baby doesn't have to fight the way it's brother did, just for a chance at life.

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