Hi Lybaum, I totally know what you mean ...

jademaiden - April 20th, 2009 3:37 PM
 [Original Comment]

Hi Lybaum, I totally know what you mean about the lack of compassion. It felt like after my 2nd miscarriage, people were "sick of hearing about it". It's like they just lost sympathy... yet for me, it was feeling even worse with every loss! Even my husband's family had this "when is she going to get over this" or "just deal with it" attitude. It was REALLY difficult to feel like everybody's turned their backs on me. What hurt the most was feeling like even my loved ones had lost hope and faith that this was going to happen to me. I remember starting to get the, "You should start thinking about adoption" speech. What I heard them saying is I needed to just give up. I confronted my sister about it, and she said it was her response to ME saying "I don't know if I can do this again..." BUT what I really needed to hear from her was, "YES YOU CAN!" Not... give up... go adopt. Does that make sense? When you've fallen, you need people to help you back up and to encourage you to keep going.

Anyway - there definitely feels like a statute of limitations for sympathy with recurrent miscarriages and I am so sorry you are going through it!

Early losses are so tricky because they are so hard to diagnose. I was on folgard, baby aspirin, heparin, and progesterone for 3 of my 5 pregnancies, and two ended in losses. I guess if you decide to keep going, you have to try everything you can. I had a 2.5 cm. fibroid on my uterus. It was away from the lining, and 5 fertility specialists told me it wasn't a problem, but I was willing to try anything after my 4th loss. I had the fibroid removed and I took prednisone. I don't know which one made it finally "work".

Have you done a hysteroscopy? The seemingly small fibroid looked like no big deal via saline ultrasound and hystosalpinogram, but the hysteroscopy showed it was distorting my uterus. You just want to make sure you don't have a lining issue either.

It's good you are being proactive and covering all your bases. Something will work, you just have to find the right combination!

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