An Expectant Father's Dreams: Feeling Left Out


During a pregnancy, much attention is focused on the mother to be, and dads to be may feel left out of the process a bit. While he watches his partner's body change with the pregnancy a father to be can't help but recognize his partner's unique role as a child bearer. However, dads to be often want to share in the pregnancy experience. He may feel like he can't bond with the fetus as well as his partner who is carrying it, and he may feel like his contribution to the pregnancy is being overlooked when everyone's attention focuses on his partner's health and wellbeing. While an expectant mother's changing and turbulent emotional atmosphere is mirrored by her changing body, an expectant father's changing and turbulent emotions and self concept is hidden and sometimes overlooked. This can lead to feelings of being left out or overlooked.


To reflect this aspect of pregnancy for an expectant father, his dreams may start to focus on protecting and nurturing his partner and their child, especially in the second trimester. He may also dream and find himself thinking about his family origin. It is also not uncommon for Dad-to-be to dream about being pregnant and giving birth himself.  In addition to giving the dad to be an outlet to explore his new role, these types of dreams may let him feel more involved and bonded with the mother and child, and they may help him explore and imagine how his partner may be feeling.


Dreams of being alone, invisible, overlooked, locked out, and excluded are also common ways expectant fathers' dreams demonstrate their feelings of being left out of the pregnancy process. Confiding in their partners about troublesome dreams is important for expectant fathers to overcome feeling of exclusion and for partners to stay in touch. 


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