14 Replies
Mommy - November 12

I myself am a teen mom of 2. I love my boys and they are my world and life and there is NOTHING I wouldn't do for them. However, some people seem to think that I condone having children young. I would like to shed light on the realities that come with the little bundles of joy. 1.BABIES CRY...ALOT. If they hurt, want to be held, hungry, over-stimulated, or bored. 2.BABIES REQUIRE CONSTANT CARE. There is very little "me time" after you have children. Your "me time" turns into your "us time" or your "their time." Going out and having fun all the time will be a thing of the past. 3. BABIES ARE VERY EXPENSIVE. Even with the help of aid if you get it, it is hard. Babies need clothes every few months due to growth spurts. Babies need formula and baby food. Babies need toys. 4. EMOTIONALLY, IT CAN TAKE IT'S TOLL. Dealing with a colicky baby then having to get up and go to school or work can be hard. It can make you tired and frustrated, and can possibly make you do something you wouldn't do otherwise. 5. YOU MAY NOT GET THE SUPPORT YOU NEED. If you have a child young, your parents may react in anger and turn you away. Or your babies father may crack under pressure. (It does happen to older women yes, but younger men are more likely to get scared and leave.) 6. BYE BYE PERFECT BODY. This may be very shallow, but if you have a perfect body to begin with, it very well may change with pregnancy. Women tend to get stretch-marks and are a bit heavier after having children. 7. THE MOST IMPORTANT THING TO REMEMBER! I understand it if you want a baby, but they are only a baby for a little while. You have to stop and think to yourself : Do I like toddlers? Little kids? Preteens? Other teens? Because in a very short time their baby days are over. So please stop and think before you go out and have s_x/TTC. Everything changes when baby comes. GOOD LUCK TO ALL. P.S. THIS POST IS NOT TO SCARE ANYONE OR TRY TO JUDGE ANYONE. IT IS JUST HERE TO SHED SOME LIGHT ON A TOUCHY SUBJECT. :o)


Bonnie - November 13

Well put "Mommy". I've never made any secret that I am not a fan of teen pregnancy. I'm a firm believer you should get a chance to do more with your life first. However, life does not always work out perfectly and sometimes we have to make due with what comes our way. Everytime I see your posts, you seem to have such a good head on your shouldres. I really have to take my hat off to a teen mom who becomes pregnant and is able to make things work out well. I do get very frustrated with young teens who TTC on purpose because they want something to play with. Maybe some will be willing to listen to your advice as it's coming from another teen who has been there. I know you have taken a lot of c___p from many people on these boards, and I certainly do not want to glorify or condone teen pregnancy, but it's nice to see someone stepping up and taking responsibility. Good for you!


Mommy - November 13

Thank you very much. I really hope this helps too.


charlotte - November 14

well said mommy,you are giving a true account of what these teens do not realise.As for saying its easy by someone else,of course it is if you are going to get someone else to look after your kids just like that,its taking advantage of your own mother,she did all that before,why should she do it again?To say "its easy"when she has'nt really got the responsibility is stupid,her mother is dumped with the baby,which is unfair,and she also buys the kid clothes,so this little girl saing "its easy"has'nt really got a clue.Also,having a baby itself mommy hurts like hell,I'm so glad I had a section.


???? - November 14

Mommy were your children planned?


Mommy - November 14

No they weren't. I was on b/c both times but that didn't work. I was on the pill with the first one and the second one was a condom accident. Both are by the same guy, my now husband.


me - November 16

im a teen mom too and im glad that u make us look good. we are the few trying to do our best for our kids. yay for us good teen moms!


bump - November 16



JJ - November 23

THAT IS THE BEST ADVICE. by the way, how ol are you exactly now? how old were you wen you had yor first child? how old were you en you got married? dont have to say.


Mommy - November 23

Right now I am 3 months away from turning 18. (yay) And I had my first child at 16, then my next in May of this year. They are only 11 months apart and I got married on May 27, 2 days after my oldest turned 1 and my youngest was just 22 days. It is very hard but worth it. Still, if you are going to have s_x BE CAREFUL! :o)


So True - November 24

Mommy, I am with you on this one. I am not a mom yet but I am taking care of two which are like my own and they take a lot out of me. I am almost 29 and I planned to have my first by 30. I don't condone teen pregnancies but if you can wait please do so. Make sure you educate yourself about babies needs before you get pregnant. Also, make sure you have a strong support (your partner) as well because you're going to need that. Good Luck!!


to Mommy - December 5

Thanks for posting this here. I haven't looked yet, but I'm hoping you posted it on the teen forum as well. I can't believe all the young teens who *want* babies. Back then, I *wanted* my childhood. It couldn't last long enough. I somehow knew how hard it was gonna be after 18. It was hard... and fun too. I'm glad I waited to have a baby until 30 so I could mature, have adventures, make (other) mistakes instead & learn from them. I got to finish school, hang out with my friends unabated, go across the country, go to Mexico on a whim, meet lots of people, take part in many actions. I feel I have that much more to offer my new son now than I did even five years old, let alone when I was a teen.


to Mommy - December 5

"five years old" is supposed to read "five years ago", btw.


ThinkPink3 - June 13

Dear Mommy, I really appreciate your feelings/feedback....very down-to-Earth and real. I think with 'stars' like Brittney Spears popping out babies for PR and to replace their toy-sized purse pooches gives many teens the wrong idea about motherhood. I've notice a 'baby bump' trend with celebrities and media buzz focused on expectant celebrity moms (Angelina, Gwen Stephani, etc.). Remember, these celebrities have millions of dollars in the bank, nannies, trainers and are at a place where they don't have to worry about affording food, clothing, shelter and daycare for their baby(ies). I have read forums of teens TRYING to get pregnant! Life should be carefree, focusing on getting your driver's license, attending prom, focusing on SATs, educating yourself and about enjoying your teen years (trust me, once adulthood, college, bills, mortgage comes, you will wish you had a 'fun' time to remember)...not sitting up all night with a sick/crying baby, shoving them in daycare, or with your parents while you are attending a pep rally, or football game. I completely agree that 'things happen' and babies come when they want to (despite birth control/responsible partners/mature outlook on parenthood) is just frustrating to see young girls intentionally getting pregnant to have something to love, dress-up, show to their friends, or due to pure negligence. Babies grow up into children/teens....they don't stay cute and cuddly forever and require constant love, nurture and emotional/financial support. Mommy, you are very wise and I always love hearing about teen mothers who beat the odds, manage to raise their children and be responsible parents. I am not by any means placing judgement, rather perspective to young girls wanting to get pregnant before they are (emotionally, physically, financially) ready. I think Spring Break, summer vacation and cheerleading camp is far better when you don't have the life-altering resonsibility of another little life depending upon you. If you want to hold a baby, volunteer at the local hosiptal, cuddle your cousin, and then go home to your care-free teen life. Think about the FUTURE, not the pa__sing phase of wanting a baby just because you think it will make you a "woman," or it will make a guy you have a homeroom crush on stick around....your baby is the one who will pay the price.


kayla_shauntel_05 - June 15

I am 18 and have a 20 day old baby said it just like it is.



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