Should We Try

13 Replies
Jules - May 6

I am 22 and my husband is 26. I am not that eager to start a family yet. I guess I'm just terrified of the entire pregancy process, the toll on my body, change of lifestyle, etc. But I also don't want to find myself changing my mind later down the road when I'm 35 and too old and at high risk. Another thing is that my husband is a pilot, so I could end up doing alot of the parenting on my own, which is scary as well. I feel content with our marriage with just the two of us. But things could change and I don't wan it to be too late. What are your thoughts?


Leslie - May 6

If your not ready, don't do it. It's a huge change in your life. Wait until your ready


Jenn... - May 7

I agree with Leslie. If you are not ready you should not try yet. Don't worry about waiting until it is too late - you still have plenty of time before then. If you have a baby when you don't entirely want one you could end up resenting them, it will be a more enjoyable experience when you are ready and it is what you want. Good luck!!


too wierd - May 10

This question is almost exactly my life. I'm almost 22 my husband is 26 and he is also a pilot - in the army. He just returned home from Iraq and will probably have to go again in a year or two. Which means I'll be left to raise the child (if we have one) on my own as well. I too, am afraid to do it all alone as well as being pregnant and what it will do to my body and lifestyle. But on the other hand, I really want a baby and I feel like I am ready for one....if only wish I could know what the future holds, especially with regards to our military lifestyle.


too wierd - May 11

Wow, that is strange that we have almost the same situation! I can totally understand where you are coming from. It is nice to know that we aren't the only ones out there in this situation. Good luck!--Jules


Daisy Jean - May 25

You have ages to think about this! If you don't feel wait you can wait. What does your hubby say about the timing?


Jessica - May 25

I think that if you aren't entirely sure that you want a baby right now then don't have one. You may change your mind down the road. There are a lot of women out there who are in there 40's having perfectly healthy babies. A baby is a very big responsibility and if you don't know for sure you want it then you may end up regretting it if you do have one....


Ca__sie - June 1

I honestly think that you should start your family, things will work out,you will nver know how much you will love your husband after you tell him you hate him in the delivery room, or when he tells you honey ill change the baby! It will bring you two much closer together! GOOD LUCK!


Kris - June 1

If you are not ready tell your hubby. Sit down and tell him how you feel and your fears of having to parent alone while he is out doing his job piloting. I am also 22 and my hubby is 23 we are trying to decide if we want to start a family yet. He wants to have a house and be financially stable first, and have some fun. Being able to be spontaneous and be able to go out with friend when you want and not have to worry about finding a babysitter is nice.


Jules - June 1

Yes, Kris, I agree that it is great to live spontaneously. To decide to go to the beach for the weekend with no worries is great. I guess when I see parents with their babies, my heart melts. And then I wonder, "What am I waiting for?" And then I think of our freedom we have now to do as we please, and I guess I feel a little selfish. My husband and I have discussed the fact that I would be doing alot on my own, and he feels a little guilty about that. He is, however, very lucky because he loves his job and I would never in a million years ask him to give that up. I guess we'll just wait and see what happens. I think I will stay on the pill. If it happens, it was meant to be. If not, it wasn't meant to be. I know my husband and I will have a wonderful life together either way. Thanks all for your input!


Jules - June 2

Well, it looks like I have my work cut out for me...our friends just had a baby about 3 weeks ago. They were telling us that the baby has already grown out of his ba__sinet. My husband said,"What's a ba__sinet?" Oh, my.....


Kris - June 2

Well it does sound like you do have your work cut out for you,but thats ok, maybe having yourfriends having a baby will help with him learning to take care of a baby and maybe you guys might end up wanting one of your own. As for his job which would be somewhat of a problem since you might be alone some of the time, I believe if you are meant to have a baby thing will work out for it to happen.


Jessica - June 3

Jules= In my opinion you are making a good choice. And it isn't one that you can't change later down the road if you decide that you want to try and conceive. Easier to make a baby then resent having one you weren't ready for. I am 23 right now and my hubby is 25. He drives tow trucks for a living and loves his job as well. He also is gone a lot of the time b/c he's on call 24/7. I am currently 18 wks preg and am very excited. However last christmas we decided to have a baby. This will be his 3rd and my 1st. I have a beautiful 6 year old step daughter and a handsome 4 yr old step son. However unlike your sittuation we are ready to have a baby, and are both looking forward to it. My step kids couldn't be happier and their mother (who used to hate my guts) is also very excited! My point in telling you this is really just to let you know that later if you decide to conceive and your hubby still has the same job, don't think you can't do it on your own. You can and you'll do a wonderful job. But don't do it unless you absolutely know for sure that you are ready.


bump - October 11




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