Scared About Being Pregnant To Keep It Or Not Quot Quot

108 Replies
Lisa - January 26

I'm 20 yrs old and im 11 weeks pregnant. im scared that i wont cope with having the baby. I keep thinking about haing an abortion but cant put myself through it. Does anyone have advice which they felt they couldnt cope but have... Please messsage me..


** - January 26

When I found out I was pregnant I was kinda scared but really happy, I mean I have always wanted a baby but @ 21 & not with the father I was scared as well, specially telling my folks, that is the only reason I thought about the possibility of not going through with it, other then that I don't really believe in it for myself, so I also took that into consideration & realized I was thinking really selfishly. If you don't think you can handle it then that is something you have to consider, but I bet with support & love you''ll be great, babies are wonderful, lots of work & a big change, but miracles, I think they arrive when we need them the most in our lives...I don't know if this is gonna help you at all, but I know that when I feel my baby kicking now I don't even know how I thought about not having him/her cause it's amazing...good luck.


Bonnie - January 26

I was pregnant at 18 and went through many different minds of wanting to keep it and not wanting to, well then deceided to have an about at like 4months, I didnt want the Baby cause i knew it wasnt theright time, but I regret doing it Everyday!!!!


Sarahk - January 26

Im 20 nearly 21 and 8wks pregnant, Im over the moon about it but im married too and have been trying. At the end of the day it is your choice to keep the baby or not. If you have a supportive b/f or family then they will stand by you either way. But I think the cut off date for an abortion is around 12wks so as nasty as this sounds you need to make the choice now. If you want to chat some more email me


DESIRE - January 27

Lisa, don't worry about it. I know you looking at the wrong way as in, alot of stuff is going to change for you and u can't do certain things. But when its over you going to feel like this was a STRONG ACCOMPLISHMENT AND YOUR BABY WAS YOUR BEAUTIFUL GOAL. I regret what I did with my 1st child @ 18 aborting it because I wasnt strong enough to except the fact the guy I was with at the time cheating on me.


** - January 27

If I were you I would immediately go to a pregnancy center for counseling. In some cases, they are able to do sonograms and you will be able to see the miracle inside you with a heart beating separate from yours. Even if you do not keep the baby but give it up for adoption--all life is so amazing and precious that it is worth it to stand up for your baby--this human you haven't met yet who has your genes and is living in your body--you can find the courage, with their help, to give that little human the same shot at life that you had--even if it is with another family. In any case, the pregnancy center will help you decide what your options are and most of all they will listen to you. There are people there who have gone through the exact same thing. You are not alone. Be brave!


Becca - January 27

Everyone, married/finacially stable/ect has fears about having a baby. Whether they were trying or not. It is completely normal. The decision to keep your baby is your decision alone. I have had an abortion, and I regret it every day, but I am older and wiser now. It totally depends on your situation/beliefs/and support system. When I was pregnant for my daughter my husband was FURIOUS. He was not ready to have any children and I thought maybe I should have another abortion, but then I realized I WANTED that baby and I would do it with or without him. Well, she is about to celebrate her 3rd birthday and we are expecting again and my husband is in love with her and thrilled about the new baby. Kids have a way of making you fall in love and nothing else matters but that baby. Everything you do will be for your child. Only you know what is right for you, but you are not alone in being scared or feeling inadequate. We all feel that way at one point or another! God Bless!


Chris - January 27

Lisa; Don't worry. I had my first baby when I was barely 21. I was married, so my situation was very different, but my mother had an abortion when she was 19 and she always regretted it, and never was mentally ok afterwards. You see, right now, you have one of the highest callings.... of being a mother. When you hold your little one, he/ she will be so precious, and your life will have a great purpose. I suggest maybe getting involved in a church or something with other mothers to be, so that you can have some more support. If you want to e-mail me and talk or just b__w off steam, I am totally willing.... my e-mail is I beg with you.... don't even consider an abortion.... you'll be a wonderful mom and totally ready!!!!!!


Chantal - February 5

Hi Lisa, I understand how scary an unexpected pregnancy can be. There is also the option of adoption that you can consider. If you are not emotionally or financially ready to take care of a child, you can be proud that you gave LIFE!!! to a child and give him or her to a couple who are desperate to have one!


Todd - February 7

Lisa, Everyone gets scared. I of course can't begin to know what you're going through because I'm a male and it would be very insensitive of me to say I knew what you are feeling. I can agree with the last post about adoption. I have a sister-in-law that can't have children and would give anything to be able to adopt. She hasn't been successful with that either, but there's always hope that she'll be able to adopt a little boy one day. I hope you make the right decision that is right for you. It's may be a bad situation now, but in time, it may be the greatest change in your life to have the child. If you don't keep it and give it up for adoption, you've given one of the greatest gifts someone could give to someone else.


Jen - February 7

You are going to be fine. I was 20 when I got pregnant with my daughter. I just knew she was meant to be and I can't imagine life without her now! I was scared too. My life changed. But it changed for the better!! I looked at her for the first time and she made everything wonderful. It was all worth it. I also think it is important to know all the awsome memories you are going to have. Don't be afraid. You will have the baby and when he/she looks up at you you'll melt. Remember to stay strong and try to enjoy what is happening to you. It really is a wonderful thing!!


Lisa - February 9

I think you have answered your own question...."i keep thinking about having an abortion, but can't put myself through it'. Your fears are quite normal and it will take time to adjust to being a mum, but I am sure that with support from your family and partner it will make it a lot easier for you to cope with having a new baby. There are also a lot of places you can go to seek further support and guidance once the baby is born.


Melissa - February 15

Well I understand that you are scared. I was 17 when I had my first child. My b/f and i got married 6 months before she was born, we kept her. She is now 6 and we also have a 3 and 1 year old. I don't believe in abortion. So i guess my best advise is to follow your heart. I didn't and got my tubes tided and now i regret it. I have decided in adoption. Children are wonderful little people. I hope that everything goes well for you.


kat - February 15

my friend got pregnant at the age of 15,she coped on her own as the father was a total waste of space,shes a brilliant mum,her daughter is now a lovely 8 year old,if a 15 year old can cope im sure you'll do just fine.i know prople who have had abortions and very much regretted it,if you are in doubt then dont do it,you'll have to live with the guilt for the rest of your life,you know a babys heart beats at 5 weeks..........


m.c - February 15

lisa,i got pregnant at barely 18 my parents did not even know i had ever had s_x i was scared to death i never thought of abortion or adopting but there were times when i thought my life was over,i couldn't have been more wrong my angel is now 8 yrs old and he is the love of my life he is the sweetest little boy in the world i was headed down the wrong road drinking and partying way too much but all of that stopped when i became pregnant and i truly belive god gave me that child to save my life he's the reason i'm still here if i wouldn't have had my baby i would probably be dead or close to it by now.I now have a little girl too and 1 more on the way and i love my kids dearly and the same but there is a special bond between me and my son because there was some really bad times in the last 8 years that if not for him i would've give up he is truly me reason for living!We grew up together!good luck whatever your decision i belive you'll be just fine and a wonderful mother.


Shirley - February 16

Lisa.. I understand where you are coming from. When I had my first daughter, twelve years ago, I was a single mother and my income had a lot to be desired. I decided at that point to return to college and finish my degree. It was difficult working full-time and carrying a baby, but I did it. I prayed hard about what I was going to do and I trusted God. Everything that my daughter ever needed was somehow provided for, and I mean in excess. This baby is a gift from God and know he/she is not a mistake. This is when your faith comes into place.. Fear is faith turned inside out.. I am now married and expecting my second child (a boy) and once again, I consider it a blessing that God has chosen me to take care of this blessing.. Also, even if you had everything is place, as I do for this one, you will still be scared, it's a normal feeling. I hope this helps..


Melody - February 16

Hello lisa! I am an 18 year old mother of a 3 month old, and everyday I am ever so grateful for having him. I believe that you are a strong woman, being that you saw the need to look for help. If you have any questions on how you can suppport the baby, recieve pre-natal services, and even just have a listening ear, contact If you want to contact me with any questions, or comments please feel free to do so. good luck!!!!!



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