Scared About Being Pregnant To Keep It Or Not Quot Quot

108 Replies
To Rea: - October 19

Can you up date us on your choice.


rae - October 19

we are talking to a counselor sometime within the next 2 weeks... no firm decision made, but still planning on adoption, unless counselling gives us something else to go on....


Hey Rae - October 19

My name is Joi and I was wondering if you have found a family for your baby. If not I would like to send you so info about us. We are homestudy approved and ready to be match!!!! please e-mail if you would like to know more: [email protected]


Tara - October 22

Rae i am 20 and 27 weeks my husband and i still live with his dad. But let me just tell you that for about the 1st 6 weeks after i found out i was pregnant i was petrified i couldnt think straight for the life of me. that is until my mom explained to me that if i did not want to get pregnant i should have stayed on my pills and by stopping my pills and not using protection i wanted to have a baby well of course i thought she was crazy people make stupid mistakes but the more i thought about what she said i realized she was so right it was then i just sat in my room and cryed i couldnt imagine giving up my son i did want him i just couldnt admit it. after i told my mom that i was going to keep him she confessed to me that when she was my age she had an abortion and never told anyone not even her own mother. I was floored but as i watched her face as she told me this i could see her eyes fill with tears but she never cryed since then i have not had a doubt about my son it has been 32 years since her abortion and it still hurts her just as much as the day it happened. Im honestly not trying to sway your decision i just want you to really take into account that no mother will ever forget the child they give up you may not be in the most desireable postion currently but please take my advice and think very hard about why you got pregnant and if you realize that you too wanted your child and cant admit it yet than you will regret it but if you trully did not want a baby than please make sure that if you do keep the baby DO NOT ever tell them they are a mistake that is something that will hurt them everyday of their lives.


rae - October 22

i dont see how i could ever mutter the word mistake around him, if i were to keep him. he wasnt a mistake, he just wasnt planned. my parents made the mistake of yelling at each other through many of their fights, me overhearing them, and my mom laying into my dad because he wanted me aborted, and my dad going off on my mom because she didnt really want me either... i never forgot that. how are you guys paying for everything? im starting to go crazy not knowing what to do. i have so many people who support me, but financially i have no one besides myself and my boyfriend. i just dont know what to do just yet. are you going through state funding, or are you guys doing it all on your own? my bf is worried that if we kept our son that he wouldnt be able to finish school, which weve already invested thousands of dollars in, and that he would have to work at a minimum wage job the rest of his life. he doesnt want that for us or for our son. im worried about the same thing. i couldnt imagine any other way, though... any help, especially from people who are younger and in the same position as me would help so much. if we do give him up for adoption, it is going to be through the boys and girls society, not a private one. sorry to all you ladies who would be wonderful mothers to my son, but i just think that it would be easier on us if we stuck with our original plan... tara, thanks so much. i know im not alone, but sometimes i feel like i am... it helps to know there are others out there in the same situation.


Tara - October 22

Rae my husband could totally understand your parent situation his parent had him when they were 18 and his mother is an alcholic who has in the past said some very hurtful things given your situation i would be just as confused as you i wish i could say that adoption would not be a good thing for you but seeing that your bf is in the picture i just dont know if he didnt care for me the decision would still be very hard but i dont think i could do it on my own. i understand the whole money and minimum wage thing and if i was alone i would still have a bad job. not that my husband has a great paying job he is a lumberjack but he did start out not having any experience its all about finding the right opportunity. as for me i do go to school just community college it is alot less money and he works full time he let me put my schooling 1st above his but that is really because i have 2 years in and he stopped cuz he didnt know what he wanted to do and i was dead set on my career. so basically he works full time and i go to school i hope he wants to go back to school but if he doesnt i wont be mad you know. i hope you make the right decision for the 3 of you if you do adoption than i hope he goes to a great family. oh and keep in mind that if you promise to give him to someone else it would hurt their family very much if you changed your mind at the last minute so think long and hard and figure out for sure what you want to do so you dont hurt another mother who wanted your baby.


Beverly - November 9

I just want you to know.. I am truly sorry for what you may be going through.. But I will say this God Loves you and he will see you through it all... I am 27 awating to adopt a child to a loving and careing home... Pleas email me if you would like to chat


Hanna - November 14

I have never known anyone who has said down the road, "well thank God that I had that abortion." Abortion usually comes with years of regret and depression. God already has a name for that baby, who now at 10 weeks has the same finger and toe prints that it will when it is 80 years old. God Bless your baby and you.


Crystal - November 16

I am only sixteen and i myself was faced with that decision, i myself do not believe in abortion. But, i think that if you have means to support the baby you should have it. If you really don't want it then give it up for adoption. If you get an abortion, you are going to have to live with the fact that you killed your own kid. Now personally i don't know you or know how you feel about that, but keep it in mind. Thank you for your time.


Sarah D. - November 16

I am 35 and preganant for the 1st time. My husband was adopted. I think the women who go through 9 months of pregnancy and give their babies up for adoption because they know that they cannot give the baby the life he/she desrerves, are saints. It must be very hard to give up the baby but it is in my opinion the greatest and most selfless act one can do. I wish I could meet my husband's birth mother and thank her for her generosity. My husband and I were considering adoption because we had been trying to conceive for a little over two years. Please consider adoption. Good luck to you.


angelea - December 1

first question is do you have support from family, friends or father of the baby? that can make all the difference. i have a 4 year old and a 3 year old and currently 38wks pregnant, but 18 months ago i had an abortion. the father of my first 2 was not a very good person. the relationship was very violent and he went to goal a number of times. the last time he got out, of course i get in contact with him and fell pregnant again. i was 6 weeks and i had decided that i could not have another child to such a man. he already denied the two we already had. it is not a nice thing to go through even though it is quite painless as you are asleep, but it is the after effects and the emotional effects that got to me. and now that i a m pregnant again to a wonderful man that is unbelievablely supportive and understanding i sometimes cant forget that fact of what if i hadnt gone through with it. when it come down to it, it is your choice, your body, your life. but please if you go through with geting rid of it make sure you have a good support network around you and speak to the father aswell, i know its you body but is apart of him too. you maybe in 2 minds at the moment but once you feel the first kick and seeing your belly getting bigger and hold your baby for the first time, them thought of never haveing him or her will leave you for good and you will wonder how you ever lived without them. its alot of hard work but its all worth it.


Sarah - December 9

I went through the same thing - i am 24 (23 when i found out i was pregnant) and i still don't feel ready to become a mum - i still feel like a child myself! I had been in a strong relationship for 4 years when we bought a house together and things went wrong we ended up splitting up and i got with someone else straight away after 3 months i found myself pregnant - i sobbed every day and convinced myself i couldnt go through with it - i wasn't ready its not that I had so many other things i wanted to do - i just wasn't physically or mentally prepared for it and i always thought i would be and it would be planned when i had a child. I spoke to my partner and he said he would stand by me what ever i decided - it was a very emotional time for us both and our families. The day arrived and we went to the abortion clinic together - i had a chat with a nurse and was still convinced i was doing the right thing until i had to have a scan to determine how far gone i was so they could terminate in the correct way (tablet or surgical) as she did the scan i looked at the screen and got the biggest shock of my life there was my baby - i never imagined at 9 weeks it would actually look like a baby i was expecting a blob on the screen - i just burst into tears and so did my bf, we got out of the room and just sobbed on each other - it was then that i decided no matter how apprehensive i was feeling about it all i couldn't go through with the abortion! I have nothing against abortions its whatever feels right for that individual but i do think that you have to be very strong minded and stable otherwise it can destroy your life forever! I also think that of adoption - is it really fair to bring a child into the world for it to grow up knowing that its own mother and father didn't want it - think about it yourself how would you feel if your parents had rejected you - surely it would be better never to of been here in the first place? you wouldnt know any different. I am now 38 weeks pregnant and althought i still have my doubts, worries and anxioty about becoming a mum for the first time - i am gonna give it my best shot cos that is all i can do! I already love him and he's not born yet and no matter how hard things might get - love costs nothing and i know that the bond between me and my son will be one of unconditional love and we will have that forever!


jessy - January 5

thats just what i wrote on a board about pregnancy..i like to state my opinon


nicole - January 11

you can do it , I am 18 and having a baby with man who is worthless and no matter what i am going to keep my baby


sammy - January 12

I would definitely recommend going to pregnancy counseling for anyone debating about whether or not to keep a baby. Take the time to weigh all your options first. My personal opinion is that abortion is wrong except in cases of rape/incest, danger to the mother and similar situations like that. Every baby has a right to live, but I also feel that every baby has a right to grow up in the best situation possible. Adoption is always an option. If you don't feel you can provide your baby with the things he/she needs, then give your baby the chance to grow up with parents who can. There is nothing wrong with doing what is best for your baby (and most likely you too)! If you are not ready to be amother, then hopefully down the road when you are better prepared you will have other opportunities to be the mother you really want to be. You have to do what is right for you, but please don't forget there are loving couples out there who would love to help you do what is best for your baby!


Mama - January 14

If you have an abortion i can almost guarantee you will join the millions of women who regret it everyday of their lives....Life has been created, enjoy it or give it to someone else who will....



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