Pregnant Not Happy

7 Replies
LEX - May 4

ok so this was totally unexpected. I was on bc. This was not planned but i did become pregnant. I am 23. And have come across a great job within the last year that i make about 30,000 a yr. With out a college education. Im finally getting on track and now im preggos. I just started telling people at work. They are so overly excited and Im just i dunno "mute." My one friend called me on it lshe said "Its like you dont have any emotions??" I dont knwo whats wrong with me my mother is upset because she wishes I be happier about it. I was a RH factor baby with all sorts of problems. Coming from her end i guess i should just be happy i dont have the same type of problems she had with pregnancy. She said im lucky I can even have children. My boyfriend is over joyed he cant wait. He kept asking me to call in for the blood tests the other day. And i had to keep reminding him the office didnt even open yet! It was like 7am. I think my biggest fear is he is not the one for me. And i just may have made a huge mistake in my life. We have been together 2 1/2 years. But had our issues and hence brokeup twice. Im still hurt tremedously over it. I dont think its somethign i will ever get over honestly. And now Im pregnant. I keep thinking of possibly getting an abortion and just saying i miscarried. i couldnt bare to be a single mother. Thats just not possible for me. I have so many goals in my life that would just not happen if that would happen. And adoption is cruel in my book. That child will wonder what happened to its mother for the rest of its life. Why do that. ugh im just so depressed..maybe its just being preg. thats making like this cause im tired but i just called even think about it during the day. help me i just need someone to talk to


MHO - May 4

Sweetie if I could give you a big hug I would. I can't advise you on what to do because I'm not in your shoes. I do think however that this depression could be part of the hormonal and emotional stuff with the pregnancy. It might be a good idea to talk to a couselor about it. Babies are not the end of your life, they are such a blessing and an adventure.. they fill your life with such amazing things. You also don't have to give up on a career if that's what you want, you might just be delayed momentarily. Whatever you decide to do, this is your life and you don't have to answer to anyone but yourself. It's my opinion that adoption is a far better choice than terminating a life. That baby is meant to be here, or you wouldn't be pregnant ;o) Best of luck, and please talk to a professional soon if you can.


Understand - May 4

I know how you feel, I was 21 when I got pregnant with my first baby, although I had nothing really...I kept him and he is now 9 and one of the greatest joys of my life!! Things happen for a reason!! I am 30 and now pregnant again!! I was on bc too and my boyfriend was furious, he even insisted that I get an abortion and I told him it was never going to happen...he has come around and is now happy...believe me...things always seem horrible at first, and right now you have to adjust to the idea that your pregnant....whatever decision you make...please talk to someone and weigh all your options....good luck!


Lulu - May 5

I am so rorry for you. I don't think I would have thrilled at your age either but I hope you can make the best of it for your baby's sake. Thankfully we live in a society where we have all kinds of choices. You need to talk to Planned parenthood, your dr., your mom. I wish you the very best in whatever you decide to do.


Heidi - May 5

Well try to cheer up. You may be having these feelings due to hormones. I know I did at that stage. Nobody said you have to give up your good job either. I love my job and make decent money so I plan on coming right back after my maternity leave. You don't have to give up all your goals because you're going to be a mom, they just may take a little longer to accomplish and you may find that having a baby was your biggest accomplishment :) Keep your chin up. Everyone goes through the roller coaster ride with their spouse. I know I have and even wonder if he's the right one but every relationship has it's bad times but you have to work past them and move on. Maybe you should sit down with your boyfriend and tell him you're still hurt about whatever happened in the past. Open up to him and maybe you'll feel better about it. Don't give up hope just yet. I wasn't happy at first either and I'm 30! Everyone was so excited for me and I was just like, ah, okay.....and would get very emotional. After about the 9th week my hormones got better and I quit feeling so depressed and started looking ahead. Now at 16 wks I'm back in the slump but trying to keep an open mind about it all. I believe things happen for a reason. Take care!


Harry - May 5

Maybe this is not the time to have a kid. You could always terminate. Then you would probably feel better.


Jena - May 5

Okay, Harry, you need to go! You are so negative and that's not what this forum is about! I'm sorry - I know it's free speech but I haven't seen one positive comment from you. Anyway, Lex, it's TOTALLY normal! I'm 23, married, was ttc, and am pregnant with twins. I'm extremely overwhelmed and sometimes just think I can't do it. But I will, and it will be GREAT. You sound like you have such a supportive family - mom, bf, etc. and that helps SOOOO much. I know you can do it and while having a baby may slow your completion of goals, it will NOT stop it! You could be suffering from depression (no big deal - me too!) and talking to someone about it could really help. But remember your hormones are crazy right now, so how you are feeling is really out of your control. Take care and you'll be fine.


Jena again - May 5

Okay, I didn't mean to say how you are feeling is out of your control as in you can't fix it - you can (!) - I meant to say don't blame yourself for how you are feeling because it is the hormones. :)



You must log in to reply.

Are you New to the forum? Sign Up Here! Already a member? Please login below.

Forgot your password?
Need Help?
New to the forum?

Sign Up Here!

Already a member?
Please login below.

Forgot your password?
Need Help?