Grandma The Anti Giver

8 Replies
Angi - November 7

My grandma is an artist - a really good detail landscape artist and she gave me a painting last year and now she wants it back to sell at a gallery. I really wanted to keep this GIFT to pass down to my children and a few months ago she was diagnosed with br___t cancer which isn't good at 72 years old... anyways I was wondering what I should do to keep the peace because she is supposed to stay with us for thanksgiving week from Florida and if I don't do this she might not come - is there anyone who has experienced something similar or any advice??? I'm beyond frustrated (this isn't the first time she's done this and last time she actually sold the picture and promised to paint me another, never happened and now she is taking another back - ahhhhhh!!!) anyways, please any advice would be helpful :)


Kr - November 7

Some people are just like that. I think if you really like the painting you should tell her that you really like it...and then offer to BUY it from her. If she has promised to sell it to someone else tell her you would like to buy another one. Maybe she will paint one especially to you specifications. Peace is a good idea. Make sure she knows that is what is important to you...and never ever ever accept a "gift" painting from her again.


J.J. - November 7

Obviously if you and she were close she wouldn't be giving you gifts just to take them back. If she never told you that she would be taking it back, then she's wrong. I'd let her know how much it hurts to give the painting back, then I'd give it back to her, and firmly tell her to never give you another painting if she expects to get it back. Is she really poor, or does she need the money for doctors? If so, then you should have thought to give her the painting to sell before she asked.


kris - November 7

I agree totally with Kr - tell her that painting is worth more to you than it would mean to anyone else, and you want to pa__s it down to her grandchildren, so you'll buy it. Maybe you'll shame her into giving it to you - for good.


Lisa - November 8

I would be really upset if my grandmother did that to me. I would remind her that she gave it you as a gift and what your plans were for it...if she wants it, give it back to her. Ask her to exchange for another painting in it's place; she should be able to do that atleast.


sara - November 8

I wouldn't give it back to her. Tell her she gave it to you and you would like to keep it. I really like Kr's idea about offering to buy it if she puts up a fuss about it. I agree with all of Kr's advice never take another gift painting from her again. or anything that you don't mind giving back someday.


No name - November 8

Perhaps you should just tell her how much it means to you. She might surprise you by telling you to keep it.


My answer - November 8

Just another thought that no one has hit on yet... is she asking for it back because she has some large medical bills to pay? Cancer is devistating to your financial situation and she may need all the resources she has right now. I also think it would be best if you could offer to buy if from her... maybe that offer would get her to understand how much it means to you.


Keely - November 8

I don't agree with her giving and then taking back, that is a crazy thing to do, unless like 'My Answer' said she wants to sell it because she needs money now that she is sick and in that case you could offer to buy it or just go ahead and let her have it back.



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