How To Tell The Boss

15 Replies
Rachel* - March 18

I am going in for my second doctor appt today (13 weeks) and I was planning on breaking the news to my boss today. It's a small company and I'm anxious about how to tell him. There are no written company policies and no HR department. Any suggestions?


Julie - March 18

I say just make an appt. with him and tell him.


leslie - March 18

Depends..Do you have a good relationship with your boss, or is he the serious type of boss?


Rachel* - March 18

It is a small office and we rarely set up meetings/appointments. Usually I just go to his office and see if it's a good time to talk. I've only been here since October 2004. I haven't really had to tell him anything personal before. It's usually stricktly business.


Billie - March 18

I would just go in there and tell him. He can't fire you or anything so don't worry about it. (it's against the law)


BBK - March 18

Hmm, well it's illegal for them to fire you for it, but salary continuance is rare. Usually it is handled by STD (Short term disability). If you have that you should be OK. I don't know if the link will show up correctly, (take out any dashes) but you can read: Compliance a__sistance — Family and Medical Leave Act (FMLA) in the dept of labor site


To Rachel - March 18

FMLA will most likely not apply if it is a small company and as long as you can perform your duties they cannot fire you. I would think of your desires and needs from him and write a list. When I went to my boss ( our company is similar- small etc.) I said I am pregnant and I would like to continue working until this date and I would like this amount of time off. I asked for a little more than I was willing to settle for that way when he said they would only give me this many weeks off I could say ok and look like I was the team player. Also expect it to be unpaid. Ask about returning slowly if that is what you want. Come to him with a plan especially if there is no dept. that handles this and no written precedent. He will like your straight forward and prepared point of view. Good Luck.


To Rachel - March 18

I also had only been with the company since Aug. 2004 and I told then in November when I was 4 weeks pregnant because of complications then we got sold and then I had to do it all over again. I managed to get 12 weeks off and 6 they are paying me a portion of my regular salary. They are holding my job and letting me ease in over the first 6 weeks back.


Rachel* - March 18

The problem with going to my boss with a plan is that I think I might want to stay home for 6 mos after the baby is born. Also, I am interested in working only part time or working from home. I think this might be too much to tell him right away. What if I change my mind and want to come back sooner and resume full time? I was thinking of just letting him know that I am pregnant and asking him what the company policies are. I think I can have a deeper conversations with him around month 6 or 7. Does this sound like a good plan?


tara - March 18

I think you should just tell him about the pregnancy for now and see how he takes it and let that sink in for a some time. We don't make appointments in out office either, I just walked into his office and talked about some work stuff and the said, 'well i have some news that I'd like to share and it's important that you know. I'm just about 3 months pregnant.' If he asks you about long term plans you can say that you havn't yet made a firm decision and would like to think about it for a while. good luck.


Rachel* - March 18

Tara, I like that. Thanks for your input. I'll post later to let you know how it goes :)


~S~ - March 18

You really should tell him ASAP. He can't fire you or lay you off, as that is discriminatory, but you are obliged to tell him because if you plan on taking Maternity Leave, he may need to plan on other arrangements while your gone. I was a bit anxious about telling my boss, only because I didn't know what to expect. I knew he and my co-workers would be happy for me, but for some reason I was still scared. Finally, I sent him and the head boss an email. I told them that my pregnancy will not stop me from working and i planned to stay here as long as I can. I also told them that I have every intention of returning after taking Maternity leave. Everything went well, they were happy and excited for me...Good luck with beaking the news, I'm sure everything will be a-okay.


BabyTiger - March 18

Soon he would know anyways :). No other way, except to tell him the way it is-- in a calm, respectful and full-of- excitement way :). He'd feel bad if he doesn't think it's good news seeing your happy expectant face! :))


To Rachel: - March 18

The problem also arises that depending on other state laws he may not be required to hold any position for you much less for 6 months. I think you are asking too much. If you want 6 mo. off you should plan on resigning and finding work when you are ready. I think you should really evaluate what you can afford to do and then decide. But yes you should talk to him as soon as possible.


tara - March 18

Rachel* I have been thinking about you all day - how did the talk go?


Rachel* - March 18

Tara, thanks so much for your thoughts. I took your advice and told him that I had something important to tell him. He congratulated me and was very nice. I am due at the end of September and he said that is good because it is a slow time for our company. Thanks again for your thoughts!!



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