Jlorenzo Please

15 Replies
autum - March 16

hey looks like your a big help on here lately, anyway my bf and i are talking about kids. i already have one from a previous relationship. he says that he isnt ready, but then the other day he brought up the subject as i want you pregnant. now he says he was joking, but i sense that he is scared of having his own child, as a man what would yoou make of that


b - March 16



JLorenzo - March 17

Hi Autum! First off, how old is your boyfriend? I think the reality is that if he is with you and you have a child already, he is willing to committ to the relationship. That is a good sign that he didn't head for the hills when he found out you were already a parent! I think every joke has a hint of seriousness to it. He is probably exploring the possibility of starting a family with you and he simply wants to feel his way through it. But I can tell you this, personally I go about things the exact same way! Ask my wife; she always knows I want something when I start joking about it. Call me Josh and let me know what happens with this okay?


autum - March 17

thank you josh. he is 26. i forgot to mention earlier that i recently went off the birth control pill in jan. talked to him about it and he never told me not too. we do have unprotected s_x, always. so his body language, and actions tells me its good if we get pregnant, but he still confusses me with the "joke". sorry for repeating myself, its just fustrating. i will let you know what happens good or bad. and thank you ever so much.


Elena - March 17

OH my gosh ,Autumn, i so know how u feel right now. I have 2 kids already and mentionned a 3 rd kid and he says he seriously against it , but like u when i told him i went off the pill, like ur b/f ,he didn't tell me not to and we have unprotected s_x all the time as well.I even told him that im letting him know i am not on any bcp, so if "anything" happens, he shouldn't blame me by saying i didn't tell him i wasn't on bcp, and he laughed about it as if he wasn't bothered about it. So i'm like u, all confused ! He says he does not want anymore kids for now, but agrees to be intimate with me knowing im not using anything ! What the heck is going on in their heads ?? Im 26 & he's 35 by the way What do u think ? I do think like Jlorenzo, some ppl use jokes to cover serious issues.Don't mention it again and let him come forward about it , and see how it goes.Good luck !


autum - March 17

lol we are in the same boat, men sometimes i wonder who is the more complicated ones, us or them LOL, anyway i dont ever mention it he does, he is always talking about how i have baby on the brain, because im baby this and baby that, you know with cloths and tv shows, im always complimenting on baby stuff, there so cute, but even when not saying anything he thinks thats what im thinking about BABY, but really its him, if that made any sense. sorry im blabbering. like for ex, the other day i had really bad cramps, i was complaining, (af) i said that i didnt want them, so he said, well your gonna get cramps either way, either those ones or the other ones (meaning pg cramps) then he goes, ohhhh you want the other ones, with a little giggle. and that was that.


Elena - March 18

So Autumn, did u remind ur b/f ur still not using bcp ? I mean, im thinking ,if they really didn't want us to get preg. surely, they would take all the necessary measurements to prevent it. I know if i was the guy and my g/f, wife was constantly brabbing about a kid, i would make sure she's using bcp .They're not stupid, u know.LOL Men....! What are they being scared of ? We are the ones who are gonna carry the child and suffer the childbirth.I wish i had a wide word to give u , but frankly i am as confused as u are! Arghhh....men !!!


JLorenzo - March 18

I feel like I walked into a taping of Oprah Winfrey! I can't speak for all men on this, but sometimes women give confusing signals too. I think it is human nature. My wife tells me something and I am like, "huh? What in the hell are you talking about." She then thinks I am either stupid or didn't pay attention. But I just didn't understand what in the world she was asking...communication between the s_xes is tough. Sometimes I think it might be best if I were gay. At least then I could communicate with someone I know and double my wardrobe!


Elena - March 18

LOL JLorenzo ur funny ! Yeah ur right , it does sound like an Oprah Winfrey show ! Now tell me , if ur wife tells u " I am not on birth control anymore !", what is it u wouldn't understand ? It's true men and women do speak different languages ! Hubby says it too, "i'd be better off being gay , cos womaen are too.....somehow ". Sigh.....what to do ??


autum - March 18

yes he knows that i am not on birth control, ive even bought condoms, and foam just incase he didnt get that im no longer protected, and still he refusses to use them. i didnt beat around the bush about this issue either i flat out told him i want a baby, and im stopping the pill, are you ok with that? "ya that's fine" was his answer, but then he doesnt think he's ready for a baby , then couple weeks later he starts saying he wants one until last week its back to "Im not sure". hope you have better luck , oh ya and my son is starting to ask for a sister good timing LOL


JLorenzo - March 19

Elena, when my wife got off BC I was happy because I wanted to try for a baby. But if I hadn't, I would of either gotten some form to use myself, or packed my things in the middle of the night and moved to Alaska!


Elena - March 19

LOL J-lo u are really funny ! That's what i'm talking about ! As a man , if u really didn't want to impregnate ur wife and knew she was not on BCP, well...u said it urself ! PS: welcome to Oprah Winfrey show, please take a seat ..! LOL Autumn, ur b/f does sound like he wants a kid , but is d__n scared ! Try to rea__sure him, it's gonna be fine . Since he says it's fine not to use BCP, i suppose he knows how babies are made and by continuing having unprotected s... with u, u'll eventually get pregnant ( if ur not already ! ) so , frankly, i feel for ya !


autum - March 19

thank you elena, and josh you are funny. hopefully it does happen soon, not now as af made her show bla......., he probley is scared, there is no children from his side of the family yet, we would be first. but time will tell, so how are you doing lately?


Elena - March 19

Sorry ur dirty aunt showed up . It's probably why then ,if he hasn't got any example, he might freak out BIG time ! I mean if he had loads of nephews and nieces, he'd be more relaxed about it ! Sigh... don't worry , he'll come around ( eventually ! ) Nothing special is going on over here, how about u ?


autum - March 19

well just had a "talk with him" and he says that if i thought he was serious, and didnt see that he was joking that, that just goes to show how nieve (sp) i am, i'm really upset with him right now. and now i dont disipline my son well enough. when i say jump he doesnt say how high. i agree that im not very strict, but i am a good mother and he is safe and knows his boundries.sorry for talking about me, me ,me just venting, thanks for listening. what do you think of this new update. im ready to say the hell with it sometimes. anyway i drop in tomorrow hopefully on a more happier note. again sorry for that talk about me, we should keep in touch my email is [email protected]


JLorenzo - March 20

Well Autum you know my motto, nothing wrong with talking about how you feel.



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