Losing Best Friend

2 Replies
crabapple666 - September 15

I'm 33, single, childless, obese, chronically depressed, and unemployed. I've been single most of my life, and no partner is on the horizon. I like kids and want them some day, but it looks increasingly unlikely. A few months ago, my best friend moved almost 100kms away with her partner, and got a couple of jobs. Now she is pregnant. I was all excited to be an "auntie", but all of a sudden she doesn't want to know. My car is unreliable and I can't drive up there, and I can't afford another one. On Facebook, she is all ultra friendly with other mothers who she couldn't stand while she was single. She has stopped texting me, ringing me, and when I ring her she's really flat. She even got tetchy with me on Facebook for no real reason. Now I feel like I have lost my best friend of almost 10 years, and my life is even more c__ppy and empty than it was before. I feel suicidal and that I will eventually lose all my female friends to motherhood and that I will end up miserable and die alone. I can't think of another place to ask for help as there isn't a place for single friends who feel like their life is over because they have no family of their own.


melip82 - October 6

I felt like I was losing my best friend when she became pregnant at the age of 18. We were attached at the hip and then all of a sudden she fell off the radar and it was all about her new little family. I was depressed as well and going through rough teenage years and really needed her....but we were on two different levels at that point. All I can say is that with time, everything comes full circle. My friend and I are still best friends till this day and are as close as ever. It is normal for friendships to go through cycles. In the mean time, you need to seek counseling for your underlying issues and wait for your friend to come around. If she never comes back around then she was never a friend to begin with. Focus on yourself to make yourself better, and dont rely on others for your happiness! Good luck!


loriandbaby - October 7

I know I may not say what you want to hear since I guess I'd be your "pregnant friend", but I kinda know what you're saying. I never had many friends growing up and boyfriends are pretty non-existent too. I've battled depression and suicide all my life (for many reasons), but finally got a hold of myself couple years back with the help of an awesome councilor and self-acceptance. But then I got pregnant and everything fell out from under me. There was a time where this pregnancy was the only thing keeping me alive. Believe it or not, my friends all left me. Every single one of the few I had. Your friend may feel insecure and unworthy of your friendship. Her hormones are going out of control so she will not necessarily make the best decisions. I suggest to just wait till the pregnancy is over and the baby is here. But then keep in mind that she'll be busy taking care of the baby. She needs a true friend beside her, especially now. Though that may not mean hanging out on weekends; just let her know you're there.



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