10 Replies
Anya - November 1

My fiancee and I have been together for almost two years. Towards the end of august I met up with an old friend who I had not seen in years for coffee. He raped me. I tried to get him off of me but he wouldn't stop, the most I could convince him to do was use a condom and when he went to put it on I tried to run, but that didn't help. It happen anyways. I told my fiancee and he has been helping me recover physically and mentally. I found out in sept that I was pregnant, I'm not three months pregnant. My fiancee and I have been going back and trying to remember all the times we made love before this happened. We deseperatly want this child to be ours. Is there anyone who knows what I can do? Is there some way to find out when I concieved. I'm so scared. I need help


Anya - November 1

I'm three months pregnant. I type too fast when I'm upset :(


Viv - November 1

If you can remember the dates of your periods you might be able to be more sure. At this stage of the pregnancy a doctor can give you a fetal age quite accurately. You can do pre-natal or post-natal paternity testing. Would the two of you keep the baby even if it was not the fiances, or would adoption be a better solution? You have our sympathy.


Anya - November 1

We talked about adoption, I don't know if I could take very good care of the baby if I found out it's from that man. Everytime I think of him I feel sick. My fiancee though said that we could do a paternity testing and go from there, because he considers himself the father. He's been there since day one, he's come with me to my appointments and read the books.I wish I could do something , I feel like this is all my fault.


W - November 1

How on earth could a friend do this? Did u go to his home? He wasn't a very good friend! Have u informed the police shouldn't u think that he should be punished incase he tries to do this to another friend. U will have to do a paternity test it's the only way u will find out. Good Luck x


Anya - November 1

I don't know why he did this. I brought him over to my house so I could get my puffer *I have asthma* and then the next thing I knew he was doing this. He was saying how long he wanted me and he's felt this way forever. I told him I didn't feel the same way, I don't love him. But he didn't stop. He used a condom but he was realIy rough. I went to the police station the day after with my fiancee but the more I sat there the sicker I felt. So I just ran out of there.


Vivi - November 1

A friend of mine just tested paternity by checking DNA from a sample of Amniotic Fluid, this is a cientific way of knowing who the baby belongs to.


Anya - November 1

Does it hurt?


Mellissa - November 1

Get an amniotest as soon as you can, it should be done around 16weeks so you should go in and see your doctor right away and let him know WHY you NEED THIS TEST! It doesn't hurt, I had it done. Actually, it's the sound that is unnerving because you can hear the needle but otherwise, it's just the skin that feels it and it's less than having your blood taken. Your uterus cannot feel it. This is the only way to know without waiting until AFTER the baby is born and having a blood test with the baby and your fiancee. That would be too heartwrenching, I couldn't even imagine it. What you are going through must be terribly difficult and I'm glad you have your fiance to lean on. Get the test done. No matter what the results, it's better than not knowing and at least you can make decisions from the knowledge you gain. Good luck and, I'm terribly sorry.


Anya - November 1

Thank you so much for you support and advice. I'll talk to my doctor about getting a prenantal paternity test done. I don't want this entire pregnancy full of doubts and fear.


erin - November 4

there is probably not a way to find out now. but it sounds like your fiance is very loving and supportive through that, then it shouldn't matter, the baby did nothing wrong and neither did you. just love the baby with all your heart. i am sorry that happened to you. but be strong.



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