Scared To Get Pregnant

14 Replies
Cat - June 17

I've always wanted so much to get pregnant, but after talking with so many women, they have scared me so much about all the challenges of pregnancy and especially the delivery. I don't know if I can do it. Watching births on t.v. certainly don't help. Can anyone offer me advice on what helped them get through the fears? Is there ANYONE out there who had a fairly easy pregnancy?


monica - June 17

dont worry we all have to go thru it. Your reward at the end is the most wonderful thing that could ever happen to you. All woman are different with their pregnancy and I am not going to tell you that its a piece of cake because it usually is not. But there are some woman that loved being pregnant and there are medication for the pain during delivery. Dont let fear stop you from the most wonderful experience you will ever have.


Steph - June 17

My pregnancy was complication free. Sure there was times when I was uncomftorable, but I really enjoyed being pregnant. Labor was not that bad for me and it was not that long, so I don't have any bad things about being pregnant or L&D. Good luck to you, get pregnant, take care of yourself and you'll be fine!!


Cat - June 19

O.K. Thanks for the advice. As for as delivery, would you suggest taking something like hypnobirthing cla__ses, or just going for the epidural? Can anyone tell me if getting the epidural hurts?


Julz - June 19

Oh girl, get the epidural!!!!! I was in your same position when I was pregnant with my first baby. I heard so many horror stories about how aweful labor was and how much it hurt.....I was literaly preparing to die. But when I went into labor, as soon as I got the hospital they asked me if I wanted an epidural, so I got one. After that, it was a breeze. I was able to hang out and play cards with my fiance and sister in the delivery room. It was great!!!


Cat - June 19

Thanks Julz! That really makes me feel much better. I'm not usually such a wimp, but I am when it comes to the idea of pregnancy and birth! Epidural sounds like a great idea, but I have heard that it actually hurts getting the epidural, is that true? I have also heard that if you get the epidural, it takes longer and it is harder to push the baby out and that it increases the chances of having to get a c-section, which I know I don't want! Is that true?


Mary - June 19

I will give you my 2 cents here - I am going to be a 1st time mom in October so I know the fears you have. However, please put it in perspective. Your are not having heart surgery, you are not loosing a limb forever. You did not have a car accident and have to deal with the terrible pain and slow recovery of these things that can take years or never a full recovery. You are not slowly dying of cancer and having to deal with chemotherapy and invasive surgerys and the pain and suffering of others to see you vanish away. The end result of all of this is not death or dismemberment or permanent damage of any sorts - The end result is a baby! So no matter how painful it may be - ripped croth, c-section, pooping on table, strech marks, morning sickness .. it all shall pa__s in record time with very little or no traces of what you been through and you will live a healthy, full live caring for a little one that will love you unconditinally. So do not fear a pregnancy, only fear what is going to kill you!


Audrea - June 19

The only thing that may hurt about an epidural is when they put a tiny needle in with numbing medication. It kind of stings like a bee, but goes away fast when the numbing med starts to work. Usually the contractions are so painful you won't hardly feel the epidural. I have had many spinals done and each time it was a breeze. And that was while I was fully awake without going through labor and felt every bit of it. The numbing med takes a hold in seconds and then the pain is all over with. It is surely worth going through to get rid of the pain of strong contractions. A lot of times it helps the mother to relax so much that it helps the labor progress so much faster, and yes it can also slow it down for other reasons. Everyone is diffirent.


Cat - June 23

O.K. Thanks Audrea. That helps alot! I do have some issues with anxiety, not true panic attacks, but I do have to occasionally take anxiety meds when I have an anxiety attack (xanax) and of course I am worried that I will only become more anxious if I do get pregnant. Of course I know I can't take this med if I am pregnant, but is there anyone else out there who has taken anxiety medication while pregnant? I've heard to Zoloft is safe, but I've never taken it so I don't know how I will react to it. I really don't want to delay getting pregnant, and if I have to wait until the anxiety issues go away, I probably won't be able to conceive. I am hoping I can get through pregnancy without any type of meds, but it would help getting some input if anyone out there has had to take them and what the results were, etc. Also too during labor, can you get something for anxiety along with the epidural? I don't want to be out of it, but I heard that demerol can take away some of the anxiety, but never heard of anyone taking it along with an epidural. Thanks everyone for the input. It really does help.


To Cat - June 23

To me, it's like s_x. I was soooo scared before hand because my mother never taught me ANYTHING about it. My only education was my older sister showing me pictures and scary stories about things she'd "heard" about it. And then there are movies, which never really tell you anything. So, I was extremely nervous. And then it hurt at first, so much that we could "do it" the very first time, it had to be worked at. But now, I absolutely LOVE s_x! Now I'm pregnant, and I'm not worried at all. So, I dunno if that helps at all, but hopefully that can help you to compare a bit. Best wishes!


nelly - June 23

Pregnancy can be absolutely wonderful at times and feel so magical and there are a lot of discomforts that come along with it but not everyone has them I have talked to people who say they felt the best whil they were pregnant. As for the labor and the delivery it just depends on that person I had my first daughter almost 5 years ago and I was 18 and I was induced because she was late and it was no where near as bad as I had anticipated. I also had a very good pregnancy hardly any pains at all. I am 36 weeks now pregnant with girl number 2 and this pregnancy has been very painful for me and I am scared that the labor and delivery will be as well. Just remember that our bodies are made to have babies and our bodies know what to do and that you will be in good hands in the hospital with people taking care of you and monitoring you and not to mention the meds that take away the pain and the beautiful baby you will get it is so worth it honey. Oh and after you give birth you will feel like you can do absolutely anything.


Soleil - June 23

I had really bad morning sickness for 5 mo. but i think that was my only problem after that things were kool, of course you feel all disables cuz you cant do a lot. About labor, contractions are sooo painful and the epidural hurt so freakin bad u dont understand and after 2 they did not WORK!! I tore really bad, but after everything is done you get a beautiful baby. And as soon as you see your baby u know everything you went through was sooo worth it. I cant explain the feeling but its great. Labor and birth sucks as well as pregnancy symptoms but after its done and over with u forget all about it.


Jennifer - June 24

Welp this will b my 3rd baby(my last was almost 10 yrs ago)I think everyone is petrified when they first find out,after all theres alot that goes along with pregnancy.The scariest thing for me is labor as I know how it goes,but its the best feeling in the world when your holding your baby in your arms.Just remember its only 9 months out of your life and most of the time pregnancy is a breeze,also with labor it can be really easy too with pain meds.Dont let anyone scare you with their stories everyone is different.I remember when i was bout 15 my aunt was tellin me she hemorraged with her son,scared the life out of me,swore right there and then I was never having kids lol.Low and behold I have been pregnant 5 times and I now have an 11 yr old a 9 yr old and in bout 11 weeks a brand new baby.As it gets closer I do get more scared but just remember most women do it and everything turns out great.I say go for it you wont regret it.My kids are the light of my life and more.


Cat - June 25

O.K. Thanks everyone for responding. I do feel a little bit better. :) Can anyone tell me more about episiotomies, do they hurt? I heard that tearing is healed more easily than an episiotomy too.


Cat - June 30

Has anyone tried the hypnobirthing technique? I've been reading about it, and it is supposed to help a lot with labor fears. It is designed primarily for women going through non-medicated births, but I've read that it can also be helpful for reducing anxiety even if you get an epidural. So I'm wondering if anyone has tried it?



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